Daddy Blog: A Warning For All Dads of Girls
I’m a dad of two: one girl and one boy. Both barely more than babies - she’s two, he’s one (yes, we’ve got our hands full; yes we did know what we were doing) - so I’m no expert by any means. But there are a few things I’d like to share on the subject of raising a daughter.
Because I have found, already, that I have some double standards when it comes to my kids. My boy is my mini me - all cheek and boisterous fun that I fully encourage. I hope he grows up to be a bit of a rascal, a ladies’ man even.
But my daughter, well, with my daughter it’s altogether more complex.
[Copyright: Yahoo/Adam Sparks]
It’s because of her that I’m pencilling in a heart attack when she hits 15. Not because there’s any indication that she’ll cause more trouble than her brother. And not because I have any clue what I’m in for with a teenage girl. But because I know what teenage boys are like.
I was one, after all. And I wouldn’t let me anywhere near her.
Already I dread the day she brings a boyfriend home. I already have his visit planned: I’ll usher him in the front door and boot him out the back door before he knows what’s happening.
Or at least I wish that’s what I could do. In reality, I’ll have to let him in and, according to my level-headed wife, be grateful that our daughter, in her teenage angst, still likes us enough to bother to bring a boy home to meet us. But that doesn’t mean I can’t sit him down and grill him on his intentions, his grades, his prospects, his family.
Dads need to be a little scary, right? At least to prospective sons in law. And actually, it probably wouldn’t do me any harm if my daughter found me a little scary too. That might sound a little odd, but hear me out. I’m already fighting a losing battle: she’s only two and a half and already she runs rings round me with her toddler logic and winning smile. If I can convince her that I mean business, that I’m not a pushover, that when I say she’s in big trouble then she’s in BIG trouble, my life would be much easier and that heart attack might seem a little further away.
Yeah, who am I kidding? Not me, and definitely not her.
But seriously, I completely underestimated how I’d feel about my responsibility towards my daughter. It’s no reflection on my love for either of my children. Kids, if you ever read this, I’m telling you once and for all, I don’t have a favourite.
I have a responsibility to both my kids, to bring them up as best I can. Of course I do.
[Copyright: Yahoo/Adam Sparks]
But in a way, I do feel a more weighty responsibility to her, as the first example of how men should behave. I have a responsibility to show her how she deserves to be treated.
To tell her she’s beautiful both outside and in. To build her self confidence.
To teach her how to defend herself.
And to help her believe that she can be anything and do everything that she ever dreams of.
That’s a lot of responsibility. Luckily I’m man enough for the job.
