Are Emotional and Behavioral Nurturing the Keys to Long-Term Weight Loss and Wellness?

Are emotional and behavioral nurturing the keys to long-term weight loss and wellness?

When it comes to losing weight, many people think they can accomplish their goals with increased exercise and better nutrition. While those two factors might be enough for some, others -- like me -- can struggle to move the needle on the scale. So I wondered: What if there was another aspect -- maybe an even more important variable -- in the weight-loss equation?

With an increased interest in fitness, health and weight-loss retreats to ignite personal transformation as part of a new trend in wellness tourism, it's one thing to "go" somewhere to detox and lose weight, but what happens once you get home? To find out more, I turned to two health and weight-loss retreats that provide behavioral tools and emotional support through counseling as integral components of their programs to explore how this nurturing plays a role in long-term success.

"The weight is a symptom -- not the actual problem," says Lisette Cifaldi, director of behavioral health at Hilton Head Health wellness spa and weight-loss retreat in Hilton Head, South Carolina. Cifaldi works with individuals in group and one-on-one counseling settings as part of the Live Well and Lose Well programs, in addition to teaching meditation and leading educational seminars on how to change behavioral patterns. She sees her role as helping people find a deeper meaning for what they're doing. Cifaldi explains: "A lot of guests come to Hilton Head Health thinking they want to lose weight. When they get there they realize that the weight is the least of what they need to change as emotions bubble up throughout their stay. The changes need to happen in the the emotional system, the physical system and the spiritual system to make sustainable progress that is more than just a dress size or number on the scale."

She continues: "We make this terrible mistake of thinking that we are a body and that we are fixing our body. But really, the body is just where we live. If we want to change the body, we have to look at the whole three-dimensional self."

At Vera Via -- a comprehensive all-inclusive luxury weight loss resort in San Diego, California, MaryBeth Skoch, an integrative behavioral health therapist, begins her work with guests before they even arrive to pre-assess goals, habits, learning styles and needs to create an individualized experience. The program integrates fitness, nutrition, overall health and counseling for groups of no more than 10 people per week. For Skoch, the key to treating health and wellness goals is to nurture and support emotional systems and the mind. "Our thoughts influence our feelings, and our feelings dictate certain behaviors."

Skoch and the Vera Via team highlight the importance of building a support system within yourself. Her work helps individuals learn to use self-talk, compassion and awareness instead of self-criticism to reach goals. Throughout the week, guests receive four individual sessions with the Vera Via psychologist and director of behavioral health. Resiliency building, meditation and therapy help guests learn to combat the biologically driven stress response of increased cortisol levels redistributing fat to the waist and hips.

The key of course is what happens when guests leave the sanctuary of a program -- even one that nurtures the mind and emotional self as much as the physical self?

Accountability seems to be part of the answer. According to Hilton Head Health's Cifaldi, "You are not meant to do any of this alone. If we do it alone, we isolate. When we isolate, we become lonely. When we're lonely, we find ourselves in a disconnected place." Whether it's a personal trainer, a health coach or a therapist, she suggests everyone working toward a health or wellness goal have someone to check in with. While she facilities a Facebook group for alumni of her intensive Food Addiction Recovery Workshop to support one another once they're home, another way to stay accountable is to join Weight Watchers as a way to connect to others for a weekly weigh in.

At Vera Via, individuals receive four to six "after care" consultations via Skype or telephone after their stay to discuss fitness, nutrition or emotional goals and progress once they are home. Skoch hopes that individuals learn to connect the dots during their stay through hikes, challenges, workshops and meeting with members of the collaborative team so that they can generalize what they learned once they are home.

She reminds guests that "change is possible, even if the obstacles seem insurmountable," and advocates breaking goals down into little bits to move along the path.

Another tip? Cifaldi recommends journaling as a way to work through the emotional component in a safe way. Instead of being uncomfortable with feelings, a journal helps keep track of progress -- including relapses. "When people relapse it can be devastating and de-motivating and create so much shame and self-loathing. It can take us fully off track. But if we realize that it's like any other endeavor in life -- where anything worth working towards involves set backs -- we become more accepting of relapse as part of success." By acknowledging the challenge, we take away its power when it happens.

For Cifaldi, the ultimate takeaway for long-term success -- whether you participated in a weight-loss retreat or are working on your own health and wellness at home -- is that "in order for anyone to be successful, they have to invest in one day. This day. You can do anything for one day." Instead of being overwhelmed by the idea that you need to maintain these changes and habits for the rest of your life, the trick is to ask yourself what you can do -- right now.

Elena Sonnino is a travel and wellness writer, public speaker and chaser of dreams based in Northern Virginia. She inspires readers to discover everyday wellness in far-flung places and their own backyard at LiveDoGrow.com.