Humor

Just Looking, Thanks!

Peter McKay - Tue Aug 26, 3:00 AM ET

Creators Syndicate - This past week, as we watched the Olympics on TV almost every night, I had to sit by quietly while my wife commented, with disturbing regularity, on all the young male athletes. She wasn't talking about scores, times, or world records, or even their medals, but about how well built they all were.

  • China's Gold Medals Found to Have High Lead Content Andy Borowitz - Sat Aug 23, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - Phelps Warned Not to Lick Medals

  • Screen Play Peter McKay - Tue Aug 19, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - My 14-year-old son spent the first part of the year shoveling snow, then cleaning gutters and cutting grass — doing everything and anything he could do with an eye toward saving up a big wad of cash he could blow on something extravagant.

  • Athlete Without Compelling Personal Drama Expelled from Olympics Andy Borowitz - Sat Aug 16, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - Diver Hid Details of Intact Family

  • The Weighting is the Hardest Part Peter McKay - Tue Aug 12, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - About eight years ago, I went to the doctor to get a full checkup. I was just entering my forties, had decided to start actually exercising for once, and decided that it might be nice to see whether it was likely that I'd actually see the other end of the decade before I put any effort into fixing up the body I had been issued.

  • Britney, Paris Air Savage Anti-McCain Ad Andy Borowitz - Sat Aug 9, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - Just days after Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) broadcast an anti-Obama ad in which he compared the presumptive Democratic nominee to celebrities Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, the two tabloid mainstays fought back with an eviscerating anti-McCain spot of their own.

  • Home Alone Peter McKay - Tue Aug 5, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - My wife and I only have five offspring, but it's always seemed like so many, many more. At one point, the gas meter man came into the house, looked at all the kids chasing each around the house and asked whether we were running an orphanage. Between TV, guitars, video games and the occasional bare-knuckle death match, our house has been anything but quiet.

  • Obama Leads McCain in Frequent Flyer Miles Andy Borowitz - Sat Aug 2, 3:00 AM ET

    Creators Syndicate - Could Qualify For Free Trip to Maui, Aides Say