Justin Bieber's Mom Reveals Sexual Abuse, Addictions & Suicide Attempt In New Book

Access Hollywood

Justin Bieber's number one lady is mom Pattie Mallette -- she posted his first song on the Internet and the rest was history. But who is Pattie?

Her story is both uplifting and tragic, and she chronicles her journey in her new book, "Nowhere but Up: The Story of Justin Bieber's Mom."

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"It was a mixture of pure joy and fear all at once, but as soon as I held [Justin] in my arms everything else disappeared," Pattie told Access Hollywood of her superstar son's birth in a new interview. "He's just 10 fingers, 10 toes, perfect little baby."

Before Justin arrived when Pattie was just 18 years old, she lived a life battling addictions. After being sexually abused as a child, Pattie turned to drugs and alcohol in her early teens -- hitting rock bottom at 17 when she attempted suicide.

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"It was incredibly selfish of me," she said of her attempt to take her own life. "At the time, I was a broken, desperate teenager and I didn't have access to guns in Canada and the thought process was going through my mind - 'What's the quickest way to die?' And I selfishly and sadly knew my sister was killed by a car, and thought that's what I had to do."

While in the hospital, Pattie turned to religion to help her heal and realized she needed to forgive her abusers who are still alive today.

"This book is so not intended for shame or blame or any of that," she said. "It's to really give hope and inspiration for healing and, as crazy as it sounds, maybe even for them."

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And it was Pattie's faith that led to her making a vow 16 years ago to not have sex with a man until she's married - a vow she has not strayed from.

"One, I wanted to commit to God that I wasn't going to have sex before marriage because I believed that's what he wanted me to do," she explained of her chastity. "And the other [reason] was that I don't want to get pregnant again without having a father to help raise a child and the child not having two parents living in the same home."

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But Justin's enormous success can make finding a man a little tricky.

"I have dated... I told Justin I was going to wait until he was 18," she said. "Once we moved to Atlanta I told him I would wait until he turned 18 because it's been so crazy and I wanted to be able to focus on him, so... he's 18 now."

"Nowhere but Up: The Story of Justin Bieber's Mom" is available in bookstores now.

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