Miley Cyrus Chews Out Joe Jonas While Chewing On Kellan Lutz

The Atlantic

Today in celebrity gossip: Miley Cyrus has strong words for Joe Jonas and strong actions for Kellan Lutz, Anna Wintour threw out her Christmas tree before Christmas, and Beck is a less-than-stellar tenant.

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Former Jonas Brother (but current Jonas brother) Joe Jonas' December tell-most to New York Magazine delighted and annoyed for the same reason: He named names. From spilling details about Demi Lovato's former cocaine addiction to giving an account of how a teenage Miley Cyrus (along with Lovato) first pressured him into smoking weed, Jonas scored a publicity coup that instantly gave him the credibility he'd never had. But since then some of us noticed that his allegedly candid admissions served to throw others under the bus without him actually admitting anything unflattering about himself. One person who also noticed the slightly gross Eve-corrupts-Adam narrative in his pot story was Miley Cyrus herself, who finally gave a public response to Jonas' comments this week when she told The New York Times, "If you want to smoke weed, you're going to smoke weed. There's nothing that two little girls are going to get you to do that you don't want to do." Told! Take that, Joe Jonas. Miley Cyrus is basically an unstoppable publicity machine these days and when she's not trolling the world via outlandish sex-parodies on awards shows she's scoring publicity points the old-fashioned way: Sounding smart and funny in interviews! Imagine that. [Us Weekly]

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But telling off a Jonas brother in the NYT may not even be the best thing Miley Cyrus did this week. Depending on your fondness for C-list beefcake, you might be even more impressed/excited by Cyrus' newest hunk conquest: Kellan Lutz. Rumors of a possible tryst began last week when Cyrus and the upcoming The Legend of Hercules star were spotted ride-sharing in a private jet, but now an "insider" has revealed to Us Weekly that Lutz "reached out" to Cyrus earlier in the month and, despite his friendship with Cyrus' ex-fiancé Liam Hemsworth, the two HIT. IT. OFF. Or, as the source put it, they "hung out" because "they really enjoy each other's company." Which means so much sex, right? Just all the sex. We all need to keep warm in the wintertime, and Miley Cyrus is no different. (Now could we get a few more deets on that Lutz-Hemsworth friendship pls? Do they ever spot each other at the gym just asking.) [Us Weekly]

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If you heard that Vogue editor Anna Wintour had deemed her Christmas tree "too messy" and had it thrown away well before Christmas Day, to what degree would you be shocked? Two percent shocked? One percent shocked? Maybe just a big ol' goose-egg of shocked? Well get ready to not be very shocked: Anna Wintour threw away her Christmas tree before Christmas because it was too messy. According to  Bee Shaffer's (Wintour's daughter) Instagram account, the Wintour family gift-opening ceremony involved no actual trees. And as Meryl Streep's speech in The Devil Wears Prada taught us, the decisions made by fashionistas today will trickle down into normal practice tomorrow, so you know what that means: No more Christmas trees ever! It will be a harsh reality, but then again so is beauty. Deal with it, Baby Jesus. [Page Six]

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Few things are as fun as celebrity-on-celebrity property disputes (like, remember that time Quentin Tarantino sued Alan Ball because his birds screamed too much?), and here's another good one: Apparently Beck rented a beach house from German heartthrob Til Schweiger for three years and left it in shambles when he moved out. That last part neither side disputes, but the question seems to be who should pay for the damages? Beck claims that the house needed serious renovations including mold removal and pipe restoration while Schweiger contends that Beck's unauthorized "improvements" to the home actually damaged it severely. What will happen? How will this all play out? All I know is, very few of us will ever rent an $11,000-a-month Malibu beach house from a famous German actor, but this is a lawsuit we can ALL enjoy. [TMZ]

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Every year Barbara Walters overturns a steel drum and spreads a fistful of chicken bones to determine which celebrities qualify as her 10 Most Fascinating. But as we all know the only celebrities more fascinating than the ones Walters profiles in these specials are the ones who are chosen, but decline the honor. What kind of celebrities wouldn't want to be featured on Barbara Walters' 10 Most Fascinating specials? Fascinating ones! This year is no different, as the list of "thanks, but no thankses" include Kristen Stewart, Robert Downey, Jr., and Jay Z. Radar's unnamed source declined to explain why Downey, Jr. or Jay Z didn't want any part of this special, but the Kristen Stewart explanation was a big ol' no-brainer: "Kristen hates being interviewed — by anybody — with a passion." I realize it's no longer 2010 and Kristen Stewart's 'tude is not terribly novel or newsworthy, but this quote reminded me of just why Kristen Stewart's interviews actually ARE really good. It's because she hates doing them, that's why. Seriously, say what you will about Stewart, but she's not one for preplanned sound bites or fakey banter even if the faux-sympathetic face of Barbara Walters hovers perilously near. Anyway, another reason why Stewart probably declined is that nobody knows where she is anymore. Enjoy it, Kristen Stewart! [Radar]

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Professional junior high student Ke$ha was once amateur junior high student Kesha, but the twist is that the amateur version had better taste in music? BuzzFeed has uncovered a clip from Ke$ha's middle school days in which she sang a sincere rendition of Radiohead's "Karma Police" in front of a presumably baffled audience. Though the future popstar lacked the sleazy-drawl and thick slathering of glitter vomit she came to make her trademark, there are already whispers of the sort of desperate hunger for coolness that would make her what she is today. Which is, uh, I forget. What exactly is Ke$ha supposed to be today? This is perhaps our greatest mystery. Anyway, the video is below! [BuzzFeed]

And finally, let's maybe close out this Christmas week with one last celebrity pajama selfie, this time from the endlessly appealing Kristen Bell and her househusband Dax Shepard (and their dogs).

This article was originally published at http://www.thewire.com/entertainment/2013/12/miley-cyrus-chews-out-joe-jonas-while-chewing-kellan-lutz/356514/

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