A Latino dad said he would never agree to donate his son’s organs. Why he changed his mind

Weeks before graduating from the Sacramento Police Academy in 2000, Joe Chairez sought assurance from his father, mother and siblings that they would donate his organs for transplant if he died.

Joe had signed up as an organ donor, but he learned that his survivors could refuse to donate the organs if they wanted. His mom and siblings acceded to his plan, but despite multiple appeals, his father Jess Chairez refused to go along with it.

More than 20,000 people are waiting on California’s organ transplant list for tissue, eye or organ donations, according to Sierra Donor Services, and roughly 78% of them come from communities of color.

Higher rates of chronic diseases — heart failures, high blood pressure and diabetes — exist in minority communities, contributing to more organ failures, medical data have long shown. But due to myths and mistrust, people of color comprise a much smaller proportion of those making these life-saving donations, said Sean Van Slyck, the executive director of Sierra Donor Services.

From January 2023 to present, data from Sierra Donor Services shows, 72% of Caucasian families authorized organ donations from their dying loved ones. That compares with 38% of Asian families, 50% of Pacific Islanders, 52% of Hispanics, 57% for African Americans and 63% for Native Americans.

The data clearly shows that when donors and recipients share the same ethnicity, Van Slyck said, the transplant recipients actually have better outcomes with their new organs.

On average, 17 Americans die each day because they simply were unable to get a needed organ. The Biden administration is undertaking an overhaul of the nation’s organ donation system aimed at reducing long waits and improving oversight. In the meantime, Sierra Donor Services has been trying to raise awareness of the mismatch between donations and demand.

A Latino son advocates for organ donation

Joe, who is Hispanic, told his father that the low donation rates were one of the reasons he wanted to give. He used this argument and several others as he tried to bring his father around.

He told Chairez: Even if the family donated his organs, they could still have an open casket at his funeral. Still, his father’s answer was no, “not gonna happen.”

It won’t cost the family anything, Chairez recalled his son saying. His reply: “I’m sorry, sir. The answer’s no,”

Then, Chairez said, Joe played the ace up his sleeve. He told his father that his mother, Theresa Chairez, and his brothers Jess and John Chairez all had agreed to approve the paperwork.

If it came down to a vote, Chairez told his son, “I’m 51%, and your mom and your brothers are 49%.”

A little more than five months after these conversations, Joe Chairez was on duty as a Sacramento police officer when he went to handcuff a suspect and collapsed on the spot, Chairez said. His son had to be rushed to the hospital, and when the family got there, they learned that an aneurysm had burst in his brain and, because of its location, Joe had only a 30% chance of living.

“They talked about drilling holes in his head to relieve the pressure because his brain swelled up … or (cutting) the top of his skull off,” recalled Chairez, a West Sacramento resident, “but it got to the point that he was just brain dead.”

As Joe’s family reached the stage where they were weighing end-of-life decisions, they met a family care coordinator tasked with determining whether they wanted to donate his organs. Sierra Donor Services handles this delicate work at hospitals in 13 counties in Northern California and Nevada, including Sacramento County.

“We spend time with families, days sometimes, sharing stories, talking with them, supporting them,” Van Slyck said.

Myths, past abuses hurt organ donation effort

The agency’s work in the early stages with families focuses on offering resources to manage grief, building trust and attempting to debunk myths and misunderstandings about organ donation, Van Slyck said.

For instance, he said, some people think that, if they sign up as an organ donor, the medical teams won’t go the extra mile to save their lives when they go to the hospital. There’s also mistrust, he said, because of a past history of abuse. This includes involuntary sterilization of women of color and the withholding of medications that could have prevented the deaths of Black men who had contracted syphilis.

However, medical providers have no way to know a patient’s organ donation information, Van Slyck said, and this information wouldn’t be discussed until closer to when end-of-life decisions are being made. A hospital’s core function, he said, is to help people get better.

There are people who also believe they’re too old to be organ donors, Van Slyck said, but there’s no age limit. Recently, he said, a liver from a nonagenarian saved the life of someone awaiting a transplant.

Some people of faith express fears that organ donation goes against their religion, but Van Slyck noted that all major religions have supported it as one of the greatest gifts people can make as they depart this earth.

None of these concerns weighed upon Chairez, though, as he considered his son’s request. In fact, back in the 1970s, Chairez said, he had agreed to donate his father’s organs when he had died. He balked in his son’s case, he said, because he felt Joe “would try to save the world and end up getting himself killed” if he knew that, in death, he could still continue to save others.

It’s been 24 years since doctors at UC Davis Medical Center delivered the painful news that Joe wouldn’t make it, Chairez said, but he had a sense that it was coming from the moment he learned why Joe collapsed.

So, one day, before doctors arrived to share the latest medical update, Chairez stepped out of the family room and made his way to a space where he could pray.

“I said, ‘God, what do I do? I told my son no, that he couldn’t donate,’” Chairez recalled, “and no sooner than I said those words, God told me ... that if I honored my son, I’d be honoring him (God). I knew in my heart that I had to change my mind.”

Will Joe’s Dad agree to organ donation?

He returned as the doctor was explaining how little brain activity they were seeing on Joe’s scan. Then, the doctor asked whether they would consider donating his organs.

When Chairez said yes, he saw an immediate look of shock on his wife’s face.

Then the doctor asked about each organ.

Was Chairez willing to donate his heart? “Yes,” Chairez said.

His lungs? “Yes.”

His kidneys? “Yes”

His pancreas? “Yes.”

His lower intestines? “Yes.”

His liver? “Yes”

He then went to sit beside his wife to comfort her, he said. She was so overcome that she couldn’t speak, Chairez recalled, but she mouthed the words, “Thank you for honoring our son’s wishes.”

Today, in organ transplant circles, people know the 74-year-old Chairez as “Joe’s Dad.” You’ll understand why if you ever see Chairez out speaking on behalf of Sierra Donor Services. That’s because he’ll likely be wearing a cap with “Joe 238,” Joe’s badge number, embroidered on the front and the words “Joe’s Dad” stitched on the back.

He had hat pins made up in memory of Joe, and over the years, he has handed them out to people he meets at the annual Transplant Games promoting amateur sports among transplant survivors. When people take the pins, he’s asked them to send him badges from police departments near where they live. He’s received hundreds, he said.

Chairez eventually learned to quilt, so he could sew the badges into blankets. He’s donated those quilts to survivors of fallen police officers. Search online for “Joe 238,” and you’ll find an hourlong documentary about Joe Chairez and the momentous decision that changed his family.

“Joe saved four lives the day he passed,” Chairez said. “He donated a kidney and a pancreas to a 31-year-old lady. … She had two little girls. And then there was a 49-year-old man that got my son’s liver and a kidney.”

The man who got Joe’s heart and a recipient of his lungs have since died, Chairez said, but he vividly recalled receiving letters of thanks from them to his family.

“I get choked up just thinking about it now,” he said. “I don’t even know how to explain to you how I felt. I just felt truly blessed.”

How to become an organ donor

Californians can register to become a donor when you get a driver’s license or when you renew your license, or they can go to register.donatelifecalifornia.org/register and sign up now.

If you’d like, you can specify which organs you’re willing to donate.

Children as young as 13 can sign up.

After joining the registry, share your wishes with the family members who would make decisions about your remains if you should die. Ask them to honor your commitment.

Thinking of becoming a living donor? You will be evaluated to determine mental and physical fitness. Learn more under the “Understand Donation” tab at donatelife.net.