Tom Cruise Has Kidnapped Laura Prepon's Heart

Today in celebrity gossip: Tom Cruise may have found his next bride, Bryan Singer has been accused of the sexual abuse of a teenager, and Jenny McCarthy is officially engaged to a New Kid on the Block.

For weeks, That '70s Show alumna Laura Prepon has had to watch as former co-stars Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher prepare to usher a little person into this world, but now it's looking like she's already ushered a little person into her world! You guessed it: Laura Prepon is now dating Tom Cruise. And, you guessed it (you are great at guessing!) this newly rumored relationship is an all-Scientology affair. Page Six reports that the two were first rumored to be dating last November "after the actors were spotted enjoying a cozy dinner at the Manor Hotel in Los Angeles." Well, those rumors have suddenly flared up again like a tiny dinosaur spitting directly into Newman's face. "It’s the buzz on the set of her show," Page Six reports of those notorious busybodies and gossipmongers better known as the Orange Is the New Black cast. But just how steamy is Laura Prepon's rumored thetan-thwarting romance with Tom Cruise? THIS steamy: "They had their second date at the restaurant, too, meeting for Sunday brunch, and then she accompanied him a few days later to a dinner party at John [Travolta]’s home." That's right, date #3 was at John Travolta's house. It straight up does not get any steamier than that. When it comes to Tom Cruise's seduction of fellow church-members, whisking them away to a Travolta-centered wonderland is the nuclear option. Nobody will come away without radiation burns and loose teeth, which is a perfect metaphor for being in love. Did you like it? Laura Prepon does. Congratulations to Tom Cruise! [Page Six]

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Oh no, this is no good at all: Bryan Singer, director of the upcoming X-Men: Days of Future Past as well as tons of other movies STILL being billed as "From the director of The Usual Suspects" has been accused in a civil lawsuit of having "sexually abused an underage boy at a lurid California sex party" during the late '90s. In what will probably not be the kind of publicity Fox is hoping for in the run-up to the new X-Men film's release, attorney Jeff Herman alleges that, among other things, Singer regularly "attended parties at a mansion in Encino, California, where adult males did drugs and had sex with teenage boys," as well as supposedly flying the victim in question "to Hawaii for drug-fueled sexcapades and also promised him roles in an X-Men movie." TMZ points out that the victim was 17 at the time of the incident(s) and is now around 30 years old (heavily implying that the victim gave consent) and quotes Singer's attorney's refutations of the lawsuit: "It is obvious that this case was filed in an attempt to get publicity at a time when Bryan's new movie is about to open in a few weeks." Guys, if the allegations prove true, I don't know what to tell you. But are we all a bunch of Judge Dredds over here? No, we are not. We are dancer. [Page Six, TMZ]

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Whoops, more bad times: Columbus Short, that Scandal castmember who recently beat up a man in a restaurant "allegedly threatened to kill his wife and himself with a knife." According to the restraining order his wife filed against Short, on April 7 he returned home "intoxicated" whereupon this scene transpired:

After pouring wine on his wife, the actor allegedly got a knife and pinned her to a couch. He proceeded to list men he accused her of having affairs with, threatening to cut her if she admitted any involvement with said men. When she denied them all, Columbus put the knife to her neck and threatened to commit murder and then suicide.

Fortunately, she had the wherewithal to call the police. Short was placed under arrest for domestic violence, the aforementioned restraining order was filed, and she has now filed for divorce, too. Oh, and they have a 2-year-old child. What a wonderful story for the Scandal cast and crew to talk about at work. Which character will be summarily killed off next, Shonda Rhimes? [Page Six, TMZ]

Pour one out for Lindsay Lohan's riveting, weird OWN docu-series Lindsay. Page Six (via Daily Mail) reports that the show will not be renewed for an additional season "and the troubled starlet has yet to be notified." The notification thing is especially amusing for the same reason that it was amusing when Lohan recently told David Letterman that she had absolutely no control over the production or its editing: Uh, she is a NAMED PRODUCER in the credits. What is a producer even FOR, then? Anyway, Page Six attributes the rumored cancellation to a ratings dip, noting that the most recent installment of Lindsay clocked only around 390,000 viewers, a figure Oprah is rumored to be very disappointed by. But uh, let's be real, it's highly unlikely OWN is up in arms about overnight ratings. It's bled so much publicity out of this particular stone and it's probably super grateful we're talking about OWN at all. The likelier reason that there won't be Lindsay Season 2 is that Lohan probably does not want to continue documenting her inability to be professional and not a compulsive liar. She might be hungry for work, but not that hungry. Anyway, congratulations to Lindsay Lohan and condolences to the rest of us who love tense, awkward reality shows. May we all don black veils to match our heavy hearts. [Page Six]

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Jenny McCarthy, a lady who yammers into a camera every morning beside four of her friends, is now engaged to Donnie Wahlberg, a guy who used to yammer into a microphone every day with four of his friends. It is not clear when the The View co-host will finally tie the knot with the former New Kid on the Block, but here is a picture of them just hanging out, chillin, and loving-vaccinations-on-Opposite-Day together:

[People]

Sports Illustrated swimsuit model turned actress Brooklyn Decker recently appeared on Larry King's cardboard-and-dixie-cup powered "radio show" to talk about her journey or whatever, doesn't matter. The main thing that matters was this selfie they took together.

And finally, here's a nice picture of the very talented Craig Robinson and an unidentified friend just hangin' out.

This article was originally published at http://www.thewire.com/entertainment/2014/04/tom-cruise-has-kidnapped-laura-prepons-heart/360800/

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