U.S. Politicians: Coal in Their Stockings This Year?

Yahoo Contributor Network

Yahoo! News asked readers and contributors to play Santa for some U.S. politicians and brainstorm some handy Christmas gifts for them. Below is one reader's recommended wish list.

Santa's sleigh will be packed this year with gifts for all the good girls and boys. Perhaps even those on the "naughty" list deserve something more instructive and meaningful than a lump of coal. Here are a few gift ideas to help our political leaders, and want-to-be leaders improve their outlook in the new year.

John Boehner: The book "Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child," by Robert J. Mac Kenzie. Maybe it will help him get control of those rebellious tea party House Republicans. The next time Republican party leaders negotiate a deal with the Democrats, maybe Boehner can get the foot soldiers to go along with it.

Ron Paul: A globe, so he can see that the U.S. is actually not alone in the world.

Rick Perry: High-school government text book, so he can learn about the voting age and the functions of various federal departments (like the Department of Commerce, the Department of Education and - what's that third one??? -- oh, yeah, the Department of Energy).

Michele Bachmann: A parrot, so she can stop repeating the same old tired retorts, and maybe move on to something new. "Awwwk, we won the Iowa straw poll, Awwwk!"

Like Perry, Bachmann could also benefit from a basic American history text. The president should probably know that the founding fathers didn't "work tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States." (In fact, many were slave owners.)

Newt Gingrich: A magic potion of forgetfulness -- and he's going to need a lot of it -- to get Christian conservatives to forget about his extra marital affairs, and the 84 ethics violations with which he was charged during his term as Speaker of the House.

Herman Cain: A little black book, so he can keep all his dates -- I mean "business contacts" -- straight.

Sarah Palin: A telescope, because that's the only way she's ever going to see Russia from her house.

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