COMMENTARY | Nadya Suleman (dubbed "Octomom") knows how to get attention. The single mom of 14, including octuplets, can't manage the kids, says she's always broke and was said she "hates babies. They disgust me" (though Suleman claims In Touch lied). Those "disgusting" kids earned her $28,000 last month, however.
If the $28,000 a month from entertainment projects, bikini photo shoots and celebrity boxing matches is consistent, Suleman pulls in $336,000 annually. That's about $22,000 annually per family member. Does that figure even include her welfare payments? Many families survive on $28,000 in a year. Sure they probably have fewer kids, but per capita in a family of four that's only $7,000 per household member annually.
Yet Nadya still claims that she is $300 overdrawn each month and can't afford the children's food, school and mortgage payments. Why? Because she can't (or won't) manage her money. She could start by skipping the pricey plastic surgery (that she got while on welfare, mind you). If $800 a shot collagen injections are any indicator of how Suleman spends, it's no wonder she has no money to feed the kids.
Why does she need so much money for school for the children? Public education is free. Head Start and other government-funded preschools are free. I'm sure the Suleman household qualifies for every form of public assistance available. Even if she does pay for preschool, at about $300 per week, that's only about $1300 of each child's $22,000 living income.
Money isn't the only thing Suleman can't control. She uses her volume of children as an excuse for bad parenting. On the Today Show Suleman demonstrated her hands-off parenting style: sit calmly, discuss self, allow others to chase kids. I'm guessing this would be Suleman's modus operandi if she had two or three kids, too.
Not everyone is so willing to jump on the Suleman circus train, however. Suleman got called by "3rd Rock from the Sun", Kirsten Johnson when her screaming kids disrupted an airline flight. Suleman blasted Johnson with "why don't you grow a baby and get a life?"
If Suleman's going to fly (or do anything) with her kids, she needs to learn some basic child care skills. It is possible to manage that many 3-year-olds. In most states, the day care provider to child ratio for children over age two, is 12 to 1. As a day care and preschool supervisor, both I and my staff have managed that many kids very well. I'm guessing Suleman's older kids are expected to help her, too.
How is Suleman going through so much money? Why is she unable to keep her kids under control? Part of it is mismanagement of resources, but there's a bigger problem. Suleman has major attitude of entitlement issues. She fails to take personal responsibility. This is how Nadya thinks: "I wanted lots of kids, therefore, I should have them, but I should not be expected to care for so many kids. I am a celebrity. Everyone should queue up to help me."
The dilemma is that those children need care. If Suleman can't or won't do it, we can't abandon them. She knows this and exploits it. There must be some way to stop enabling parents like this without endangering the children.
Marilisa Kinney Sachteleben writes from 22 years parenting four children and 25 years teaching K-8, preschool, adults and special needs.
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