All the worst opinions on what Apple’s iPhone 7 announcement means

Today, Apple used a rejected stock photo to announce that it's having an event on September 7. The company is all but guaranteed to release a new iPhone or two, along with possibly unveiling a new Apple Watch and/or new Macbooks. It's all pretty straightforward.

But, because it's Monday afternoon on the internet and we still have over a week to wait for the actual event, let's speculate wildly about what those colorful dots might actually mean.

DON'T MISS: Here comes the iPhone 7: Apple just sent invites for a big event on September 7th

Luckily, Twitter is ON IT with a bevy of #hottakes:

https://twitter.com/jetscott/status/770293749289193472

https://twitter.com/pierce/status/770293206839799808

https://twitter.com/carlfranzen/status/770292901792321536

https://twitter.com/geoffreyfowler/status/770293223038316544

https://twitter.com/MKBHD/status/770292523789090817

https://twitter.com/jjvincent/status/770295188052905984

https://twitter.com/mg/status/770298925886558210

https://twitter.com/JonyIveParody/status/770297747710865408

Amongst all the navel-gazing over an event invite, there are actually some details we can tease out of the event invite. It's basically a stock photo for bokeh, the effect you get with a camera with objects that are out of focus. Good bokeh (like you see in the invite image) is traditionally the preserve of expensive cameras with big lenses, exactly the kind of thing that's missing from smartphone photography.

So, the obvious deduction is that Apple is planning a major camera update. Leaks have shown us camera modules with two sensors (and two lenses) on the iPhone 7 Plus, so it's very possible the bigger iPhone will have a better camera that can produce, uh, very pretty event invites.

Nothing else jumps out from the event invite. The location and time are exactly in line with previous Apple events, and there's precious little else I can tease out from the event image. But if you can channel your inner Da Vinci Code, there's probably some Illuminati symbols waiting to be found.

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See the original version of this article on BGR.com