What's that about summertime and living easy? Parents beg to differ. But even though we can't take the summer off from our parenting duties, that just means we'll have more memories to smile about later.
Grab a snack and a cold beverage of your choice; we'll provide the laughs.
And please call when you arrive home safely.
When I saw Top Gun in the ‘80s I fell in love with Tom Cruise & begged my parents for a bomber jacket.
This time around my crushes are the nerds in the control room & I whisper things like “Where are their life jackets?” and “He should be wearing a helmet.”
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) June 6, 2022
I can’t tell you what age kids generally are when they learn to take a towel out of the bathroom closet before getting into the shower, but I can tell you that it’s not 12.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) June 5, 2022
I took out the trash AND lined the can
-Married Sext pic.twitter.com/Da9lbGYd23
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) June 6, 2022
Whenever I see a couple doing yard work, I like the one standing by the bags of dirt who looks like they can’t quite believe they are outdoors and can’t fathom how they’ve gotten caught up in this terrible thing.
— Mary (@AnniemuMary) May 13, 2022
The pool = nature's bathtub. Right?
Other parents: My kids smell so good after a bath. I just want to breathe them in.
Me: My kids smell like chlorine.
— Julie Burton (@ksujulie) June 5, 2022
My wife: How does a summer road trip with the kids sound?
Me: Sounds like we had a good run.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) June 3, 2022
I’ve never diffused a bomb but I have woken my toddler up from a nap on the couch at 4pm
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) June 4, 2022
Is it fall yet?
My kids have been out of school for 6 days and we’ve had to take out the trash 473 times.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) June 7, 2022
Having multiple kids is weird. You have one kid you could trust to be home alone for a whole weekend & you know they’d eat vegetables, lock the doors, & wash the dishes.
Then you have another kid who is not allowed to hold an umbrella.
And they’re almost the same age.
— The 21st Century SAHM (@21stcenturysahm) June 6, 2022
I ran a 5k with my daughter. About half way she said “I wish we were watching people do this instead of actually doing it.” I don’t know if anyone has ever summed up so eloquently how I felt in a single moment.
— No Idea: Daddy Blog (@byclintedwards) June 4, 2022
And the latter is terrifying.
There is no "quiet" after having kids. Either it’s "quiet enough" or "too quiet."
— The Dad (@thedad) June 5, 2022
Got a pedicure and the guy applying my nail polish complimented me on having "very even toenail space" and it has been the highlight of my day in case you were wondering how high my self-esteem is as a mom in her mid-30's.
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) June 6, 2022
You think you’re a good parent and then you see the senior quote your son chose for the yearbook is from Lil Uzi Vert.
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) May 22, 2022
Me: Do you want your eggs scrambled or hard boiled?
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 4, 2022
my fitbit gives me like 1000 steps every time I sit and fold laundry and it’s just nice to finally be appreciated
— Science Mom 🔬 (@EmSlyce) June 7, 2022
This is relatable.
Made of steel.
You can't break me, kid. My generation survived dial-up AOL and texting on a flip phone.
— A Dad Influence 🇺🇸🇫🇷🇺🇦 (@gbergan) June 6, 2022
Million dollar idea.
Drove by a coffee shop with “Roasters” in the name and my 12
y/o daughter asked, “do they roast you before they give you your coffee or something?” Someone needs to make this happen.
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) June 2, 2022
Oh yay! Summertime. Which means we’ll spend more time in our yard. Which means another space for me to keep clean.
— Brynn (@themommylode) June 6, 2022
Did we just become best friends?
Mom talking to each other will go from “Hi, nice to meet you” to the most graphic child birth story anyone has ever heard.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 6, 2022