55 cute Valentine's Day jokes for kids that will warm your heart

Rebecca Dube and Kait Hanson
·4 min read

Valentine's Day isn't only about romance!

There's plenty to love about getting a good laugh and this collection of Valentine's Day jokes for kids are sure to put a smile on your face this Feb. 14.

Whether you're hoping to crack a smile on the face of your Valentine, or you're just waiting for chocolate to go on sale Feb. 15, these sweet and family-friendly Valentine's jokes (including plenty of puns) are the perfect gift for anyone in the family.

Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids

From punny to knock knock, here are 55 Valentine's Day jokes for kids that will get the whole family chuckling and sharing the love.

  • How do sheep reply after hearing "I love you"? You’re not so baaa-d yourself.

  • Did you hear about the guy who promised his girlfriend a diamond for Valentine’s Day? He took her to a baseball field.

  • What does a ghost call their partner? Their ghoul-friend.

  • What did the woman with a broken leg tell her Valentine? I have a crutch on you.

  • Why do oars make the best Valentines? They are so row-mantic.

  • What did the paper clip say to the magnet? I find you very attractive.

  • What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day? I’m stuck on you!

  • What did the calculator say to the pencil on Valentine's Day? You can count on me.

  • What do farmers give for Valentine’s Day? Lots of hogs and kisses.

  • What kind of Valentine’s Day candy is never on time? ChocoLATE.

  • Knock Knock. Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Luke who got a Valentine!

  • What did one scientist say to the other? We've got good chemistry.

  • What do you call a very small Valentine? A valen-tiny.

  • What did the whale say to his sweetheart on Valentine’s Day? Whale you be mine?

  • Knock knock. Who’s there? Bea. Bea who? Bea my Valentine.

  • What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.

  • What do owls say to declare their love? Owl be yours!

  • How did the phone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.

  • What do sheep say on Valentine's Day? I love ewe.

  • Knock knock. Who’s there? Al. Al who? Al be your Valentine if you’ll be mine.

  • Why didn’t the skeleton want to send any Valentine’s Day cards? His heart wasn’t in it.

  • What did one bee say to the other? I love bee-ing with you, honey!

  • Why was the rabbit happy on Valentine's Day? Some-bunny loves them.

  • What kind of flower do you never give on Valentines Day? Cauliflower.

  • What happens when you fall in love with a French chef? You get buttered up.

  • Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day? Sure, they're very scent-imental!

  • Why did the sheriff lock up her boyfriend? He stole her heart.

  • What did the lightbulb say to the socket on Valentine's Day? I love you watts.

  • What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts!

  • What do you get when you kiss a dragon on Valentine’s Day? Third degree burns on your lips.

  • What is the difference between a girl who is sick of her boyfriend and a sailor who falls into the ocean? One is bored over a man, and the other is a man overboard.

  • What did the baker say to his sweetheart? I'm dough-nuts about you!

  • What do Jedis say on Valentine's Day? Yoda one for me.

  • What did one cat say to the other cat on Valentine's Day? You're purr-fect.

  • What did the strawberry say to the cantaloupe? You're one in a melon.

  • Why should you date a goalie? They're a real keeper.

  • What do street performers say on Valentine's Day? Be mime.

  • Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Frank you for being my friend!

  • What flower gives the most kisses on Valentine's Day? Tulips.

  • How do farmers celebrate Valentine's Day? By giving hogs and kisses.

  • What did one oar say to another? Can I interest you in a little row-mance?

  • Knock knock. Who's there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you!

  • What did the cucumber say to the pickle? You mean a great dill to me.

  • How do snakes express affection? Love and hisses.

  • What did one squirrel say to the other? I'm nuts about you.

  • Knock knock. Who's there? Howard. Howard who? Howard you like to be my Valentine?

  • What did Frankenstein say to his mom? Be my Valen-stein.

  • What did one tree say to the other? Do you be-leaf in love?

  • Where did the hamburger take his date for Valentine's Day? The meatball.

  • What did the shoe say to the lace? You're my sole-mate.

  • Why do skunks love Valentine's Day? They are scent-imental.

  • What did the cup say to the coffee maker? Words cannot espresso what you mean to me.

  • Why did the zucchini take a raisin out? Because he couldn't get a date.

  • What's the most romantic ship? Relation-ship.

  • Why did everyone want to be banana's Valentine? She is very a-peeling.

This article was originally published on TODAY.com