9 funny situations for the gays to activate Vanilla Mode on Sniffies
This one’s for the discreetly horny gays!
— (@)
Sniffies has taken pride in marketing itself as a very inclusive, sex-positive, and shame-free platform for horny LGBTQ+ guys to get together and hook up. The app allows users to DM others, join group chats, and set up hookups with one person or a whole group.
The app has also positioned itself as the digital evolution of “cruising,” so that it allows many kinds of kinky interests and explicit pictures on the platform. Unlike most of its competitors, which try their best to focus on “dating” if they’re primarily used just for hooking up, Sniffies has always gone all-in on embracing the horniness and not making any excuses for it.
This week, the app launched a brand-new feature called Vanilla Mode, which is a toggle that you can turn on or off. Once activated, Vanilla Mode will blur any explicit images that might show on the app — so you can continue to use Sniffies without the risk of any penis or ass showing on your screen.
Some cruisers that use Sniffies might find Vanilla Mode to be contradictory given that part of the “fun” in cruising is the potential to “get caught.” On the other hand, we can absolutely think of a few times and places when perhaps Vanilla Mode is exactly what you should be turning on…
Scroll through to check out a few funny situations that might benefit from you turning on the Vanilla Mode feature now available on Sniffies!
While visiting your parents-in-law.
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If you open up Sniffies while visiting your parents-in-law, it’s possible that you’re in an open relationship with your man, which isn’t always an easy conversation to have with family. You could also be cheating on him… which can be, uh, tricky! Or you could even be closeted and married to a woman. Sticky situation! For all of these cases, maybe Vanilla Mode is for you.
At the supermarket.
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You’re supposed to be at the supermarket shopping for actual eggplants and peaches. There are also people from all different walks of life shopping for food there, so it’s probably not the best for the “eggplants” and “peaches” be visibly popping up in the produce department and not on your phone, sis.
During a job interview.
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When you go into the interview for a new job and the HR person asks you about your goals, you are not supposed to repeat the “any hole is a goal” meme! Just… don’t do it! Maybe put the Sniffies down for the interview, or at least turn on Vanilla Mode.
At your workplace.
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Even if you’ve already landed a job, it’s probably Not Safe For Work (literally) to just walk around with the Sniffies app open flashing all sorts of explicit photos from random users in the area. There’s also a chance that one of your coworkers might be on the map. Vanilla Mode is here for you, and for that coworker, too!
During a failed hookup.
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The last thing you need during a failed hookup is for any involved party to get the idea that you want to “keep going” that night and are looking for alternative options. If you’re still hanging out at the same place, maybe turn Vanilla Mode on before anyone else thinks that they’re invited to join your next adventure.
Inside any government building.
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You do NOT want to look like the gay Senate staffer who got stuffed in a leaked intimate video filmed inside the Capitol’s hearing room. You just don’t. We’re not trying to kink-shame anyway, but these buildings aren’t the right places to let your freak flag fly. If you’re curious about finding someone in there, at least consider turning on this new Vanilla Mode.
At a movie theater (or any theater, tbh).
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There are already strict policies for the use of phones inside movie theaters. Imagine someone walking up to ask you to put the phone down, and you have a full screen of Sniffies on your screen showing all sorts of body parts. It’s probably for the best to switch off your phone in the first place… but if you really need to look, consider turning on the toggle for Vanilla Mode. Trust us, you don’t want to look horny while watching the Beetlejuice musical like Lauren Boebert.
Hanging out at a gay club.
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This is gonna be a controversial one, but here we go. It’s already annoying when any person opens any dating app while at a bar or club. That’s true for the straights using Tinder while having a night out, and it’s also true for the gays using Grindr at a gay bar. I mean, just look around! There are options right there in front of you. So if you feel the urge to check Sniffies while going out, at least Vanilla Mode makes it a little more discreet.
If you’re still in the closet.
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Like… full-stop on this one, right? If you’re still deep in the closet about identifying under the LGBTQ+ umbrella and seeking like-minded partners to have sex with, Vanilla Mode could be extremely useful to help stay in the closet.
