He was advised against playing trombone. Now Puyallup teen will play Carnegie Hall

When Melinda McConnaughey was pregnant with her son her belly was his dance floor.

“Any time any song would come on the radio with a beat he would move,” McConnaughey said. “I knew he was gonna love music.”

Fourth grade was when her son played his first instrument: the trombone.

“The band teacher told him, ‘You might want to pick a different instrument. You really have to have long arms to play that,’” McConnaughey said. “My son took that as a personal challenge. He picked up the trombone … and he has played it every year since.”

McConnaughey and her son have been living in Puyallup for about seven years. She is an assistant principal at Shining Mountain Elementary School and her son is a senior at Bethel High School.

The Honors Performance Series, a performing arts organization, recently offered Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey an opportunity to play with other young musicians in early February at Carnegie Hall in New York City. The offer came after his teacher nominated him, his mom said.

His mom created a GoFundMe page on Jan. 10 to fundraise $1,500, which is about half of the money needed for his trip. As of Jan. 20, she had raised a little over $1,200 from family and friends.

“I’ve just been grateful and overwhelmed by the generosity of friends and family members,” Melinda McConnaughey said. “It makes a huge difference in helping me give Sabien this opportunity that by myself — there’s just no way I could have done it.”

Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey has been involved with his school’s music programs since fourth grade. He is a member of his high school band, the Tacoma Youth Symphony and he occasionally plays at his local church, Bethel Church of the Nazarene.

In addition to the trombone, Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey also plays the cello. Throughout his childhood, he has played the bass guitar, french horn and trumpet, his mom said.

“I love music so much because it’s lovely to listen to,” Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey said. “Other people love listening to it, too, and it makes a good amount of people happy.”

Third grade marked the beginning of it all, Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey said. He earned the highest belt color anyone could earn playing the recorder — the black belt. He said he earned a big chocolate bar.

“I think (my mom) might have thought I would play clarinet since I love the recorder, but I saw the trombone. It looked massive, and I was like, ‘That would be incredibly funny if I started playing that,’” he said.

The trombone has been his instrument since then, even during his freshman year of high school when he had braces, which was “very difficult,” Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey said.

“They hurt my lips every time I tried to play high notes,” he said. “It would suck.”

When the COVID-19 pandemic put a halt to in-school learning, Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey and other students in band had to practice over Zoom, which was “not fun” because they had to listen to people play through recordings, he said. They’d record themselves playing and send the clips over Zoom.

“My passion for music was a little challenged over COVID,” he said.

Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey rekindled his passion during junior year when he was able to practice with other band students in-person again. Gaining the opportunity to play at Carnegie Hall also helped, he said. They’ll do a little sightseeing, practice together, then perform Feb. 5.

“One of my dreams was to play at Carnegie Hall. That was like a huge dream of mine, and so seeing that a spot had opened up was like, revolutionary. I was really excited,” he said.

Melinda McConnaughey raised her son by herself. Oftentimes, she said, single parents are hard on themselves because they feel like they cannot always provide what they’d like for their children.

“For him to qualify for this opportunity and for us to … find a way to make it happen — it’s just the coolest thing ever,” Melinda McConnaughey said. “I’m just so proud of him. He’s got such an amazing future ahead of him.”

After high school, Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey is hoping to study trombone performance at the Oberlin Conservatory of Music in Ohio. He wants to be a professional musician and a music professor.

People can donate to Sabien Kinchlow-McConnaughey’s GoFundMe page at gofundme.com/f/help-sabien-play-at-carnegie-hall.