This Year’s Bachelor Is Aged Up for the First Time, and It’s Already Blessed Us With the Most Fun “Fun Facts” Ever

Say goodbye to the Laurens, Ashleys, and Beccas of the regular Bachelor—at least temporarily—and hello to the Sylvias, Ediths, and Nancys of The Golden Bachelor. On the new spinoff, which is set to premiere in late September, the franchise will for the first time be given over to an older Bachelor and contestants, with 22 age-appropriate women vying for the affections of 72-year-old Gerry Turner. Though the first episode is still weeks away, excitement is steadily building, and this week brought the release of some info about the contestants that only helped stoke enthusiasm further. Cast bio day is a time-honored Bachelor franchise tradition, of course, but the fun facts that go along with these boomer ladies’ bios, courtesy of People and other outlets, represent a triumph of the form. For example, now we know that among the participants will be Kathy, a 70-year-old who is “OBSESSED with Christmas,” and Maria, 60, who has “never gone paintballing but really wants to try.” Tantalizing, no? If this season is anywhere near as perversely interesting as these tidbits, ABC may have a hit on its hands. While we wait to see these Christmas-obsessed, paintball-curious women for ourselves, we decided to rank this season’s contestants by fun facts, from least interesting to most.

22. Nancy, 60

—Nancy loves a good rom-com.

—Nancy is a dancing machine, but only at weddings.

—Nancy is a Bruce Springsteen stan.

Not at all a bad start: Loving rom-coms, wedding dancing, and Bruce Springsteen are all great qualities. Still, we assume that most people love those things, so that’s why we had to rank Nancy last. What really makes you you, Nance?

21. Ellen, 71

—Ellen dreams of going to Africa on safari.

—Ellen loves dancing despite her two left feet.

—Ellen idolizes Michelle Obama.

Again, lovely facts, but a tad generic. At least, I hope they’re generic—if being a Michelle Obama–loving liberal makes Ellen special on The Golden Bachelor because it turns out a bunch of the rest of the ladies love Trump, then that has the potential to make this a very different show than the one I’d been envisioning.

20. Joan, 60

—Joan loves dancing after a couple glasses of wine.

—Joan enjoys historical museums.

—Joan’s favorite food is a big, juicy burger!

Joan is the third woman in a row to qualify her love of dancing—sigh. Is this a generational difference, in that they grew up before a million AIM profiles and/or Pinterest boards taught everyone to “dance like nobody’s watching”? Either way, I’m giving Joan extra points for her “big, juicy burger” lust. Campy!

19. Pamela, 75

—Pamela loves a backyard BBQ.

—Pamela can’t get enough Judge Judy in her life.

—Pamela loves to cuddle.

These fun facts are still a tad on the pleasant but forgettable side, it’s true, but Judge Judy is a nice reference point, and hopefully spells a little sassiness in Pamela. Is Pamela the type to point out when another contestant tries to proverbially pee on her leg and tell her it’s raining? If so, that would make for good TV.

18. Natascha, 60

—Natascha enjoys relaxing in Central Park.

—Natascha wants bell bottoms to make a comeback.

—Natascha’s favorite thing to do on a date is laugh.

“Enjoys relaxing in Central Park” is a more intriguing fun fact than it initially seems. Every New Yorker I know loves Central Park, but to enjoy not going there but specifically casually relaxing there is cool, almost insouciant. Central Park? Oh, you mean Natascha’s backyard? Also, bell bottoms totally are making a comeback. This is Natascha’s world, and we’re just living in it.

17. Sylvia, 64

—Sylvia loves any excuse to put on a costume.

—Sylvia enjoys lifting small weights.

—Sylvia makes a famous pistachio cake.

I like that Sylvia sounds exacting: She doesn’t just like to dress up; she likes to wear a full costume. And she doesn’t just lift any old weights; she lifts small ones. And naturally, she doesn’t just make good cake; she makes a famous pistachio cake. Having a signature cake is also very Tom Cruise of her.

16. Renee, 67

—Renee really wants to meet Harry Styles.

—Renee loves taking her grandkids to the zoo.

—Renee doesn’t enjoy fishy-tasting fish.

Harry Styles? Renee has good taste. And I’m not sure how not enjoying fishy-tasting fish came up, or why it’s relevant, but she’s right about that one too.

15. Theresa, 69

—Theresa loves to sing … alone in her car.

—Theresa taught herself all about the stock market.

—Theresa loves ’70s rock, both soft and hard.

It’s refreshingly self-deprecating to love to sing alone in a car, and quite admirable to teach yourself all about the stock market, so both are well played by Theresa. Probably a lot of these women like ’70s rock, but you’ve got to hand it to Theresa for mentioning—wink—both soft and hard.

14. Maria, 60

—Maria has never gone paintballing but really wants to try!

—Maria’s favorite indulgence is a glass of 100-year-old Grand Marnier.

—Maria loves Valentine’s Day.

That Maria has never gone paintballing but really wants to try is either the best or the worst fact on this whole list. It’s so beguiling. Did she volunteer that, or did it come out in the course of an interview with producers? On the one hand, it sort of tells us nothing about Maria, but it’s somehow admirably game anyway. I hope, when we tune in to the show, that really wanting to try paintballing ends up being a large facet of Maria’s personality, but something tells me that we may never get the full story behind it, and that’s a shame. If I were Maria, I would drown my sorrow in some “100-year-old Grand Marnier,” but I can’t claim to be so classy.

13. Susan, 66

—Susan has a pair of pink go-go boots that she LOVES.

—Susan dreams of having lunch with Kris Jenner.

—Susan loves eating leftovers from the night before.

I respect that this woman has a pair of shoes she loves so much that she considers the fact of her ownership of them a key feature of her personality, and that she speaks so passionately about them so as to be rendered in all caps. They must be some shoes. Would she wear them to lunch with Kris Jenner, and would she serve leftovers at that lunch? The more committed Susan is to this persona, the better.

12. Peggy, 69

—Peggy has a very cute bichon frisé named Libby.

—Peggy would love to be Jennifer Lopez for a day.

—Peggy is a go-karting enthusiast.

There can’t be very many 69-year-old go-karting enthusiasts out there, and even fewer go-kart enthusiasts who want to be Jennifer Lopez for a day, so Peggy sounds like a woman of diverse interests. And Libby is an undeniably cute name for a pet.

11. Anna, 61

—Anna spends her Sundays at the local farmer’s market.

—When Anna dives with sharks, she goes cageless.

—Anna loves anything dark chocolate—especially lava cakes!

Anna wins the award for bio element that required the most Googling. What the hell does it mean to dive with sharks “cageless”? I still don’t quite know, but Anna must be a badass. I wonder where her favorite spot for dark-chocolate lava cakes is.

10. Patty, 70

—Patty is an avid sailor.

—Patty loves her body glitter and encourages you to do the same.

—Patty can’t start her day without a cup of coffee.

—Patty is the mother of former Bachelor Matt James.

Patty was the only contestant whom People let give four facts instead of three, so she must be pretty special, and it is indeed cool that she is the mother of a former Bachelor. But her love of body glitter, and her insistence on body glitter positivity, is also quite noteworthy, and almost makes up for the boringness of the coffee fact.

9. Faith, 60

—Faith loves riding her horse, Liberty, through the mountains.

—Faith would love to be in a band.

—Faith hates technology that doesn’t consistently work.

As far as I can tell, Faith is the only contestant with her own pet horse, which is definitely a plus. (Though a horse named Liberty … once again, I am concerned about what we’re going to find out about these ladies’ politics.) Faith’s other fun facts leave a bit to be desired, but at least one person had to complain about technology or it wouldn’t be the boomer Bachelor.

8. Leslie, 64

—Leslie absolutely hates mice.

—Leslie is a former aerobics champion.

—Lady Gaga and Post Malone are at the top of Leslie’s Best Concerts Ever list.

“Former aerobics champion” is a very cool distinction, and one I hope we get to find out more about—or watch in action—on the show. We’ll forgive her for leading with absolutely hating an animal that pretty much everyone hates.

7. Jeanie, 65

—Jeanie is a certified scuba diver.

—Jeanie’s favorite color is neon.

—Going to the Super Bowl is at the top of Jeanie’s bucket list.

Neon is not a color, but I like the cheekiness of anyone who confidently claims it as their favorite. If she wears it on camera, even better.

6. April, 65

—April has a discreetly hidden tattoo of her nickname “Presh.”

—April dreams of writing a bestselling book.

—Finding pennies out and about brings April so much joy.

On the one hand, “Presh” is a potentially annoying nickname. On the other, liking to find pennies out in the wild speaks to a thriftiness and love of the little things that can be very sweet qualities in a person. I also like that she dreams of writing a bestselling book—call me if you need a collaborator, April!

5. Kathy, 70

—Kathy has been to three continents and hopes to go to all seven.

—Kathy has two adorable geriatric cats.

—Kathy is OBSESSED with Christmas.

Being all-caps OBSESSED with Christmas is one of the better facts on this whole list. It tells you so much about a person. Like, I know Kathy’s ornaments are organized within an inch of their lives—incredible! Alas, her other facts are slightly less fun—yawn, cats (sorry)—and I feel rude for saying this, but it’s not really that much of a flex to have been to three continents? Not for Agnes Callard reasons, but that’s not even half of the continents.

4. Christina, 73

—Christina’s first concert ever was The Beatles in 1964.

—Christina loves a good dude ranch.

—Christina prefers to drive stick shift.

I love all the contestants’ modern references to people like Lady Gaga and Harry Styles, but if we’re being honest, the Beatles are probably way more likely to appeal to a 72-year-old man. And having seen them in 1964 is worth bragging about—I’d still be dining out on that too if I were Christina. I am not 100 percent clear on what a dude ranch actually is, but between that and stick shift, I’m getting a vision of a guy’s girl, and though that can be divisive on the Bachelor franchise, I’m interested to see how this personality type manifests itself in a 73-year-old.

3. Edith, 60

—Edith is building an ADU in her backyard, and she is the project manager.

—Edith doesn’t do cold. Ever.

—Edith makes beautiful hand-painted birthday cards.

I had to Google ADU, and it stands for “accessory dwelling unit,” so it sounds like Edith is building something like a guesthouse, and also like Edith knows that it’s more fun to make you Google something than just to flat-out tell you. Make ’em work for it, right? I like the vintage sassiness in Edith’s refusal to “do” cold, though I wonder how it will serve her on a TV show that typically involves a lot of traveling. And the hand-painted birthday cards? She’s going to murder any art-related activities that come her way.

2. Marina, 60

—Marina has not one, not two, but THREE master’s degrees.

—Marina doesn’t stand in lines.

—Marina enjoys reading biographies and medical nonfiction.

I am impressed and intimidated by three master’s degrees, and if Gerry’s worth his salt, he will be too. As with Edith and the cold, I like that Marina is coming out against lines. Lines are an enemy we can all get behind. No one else mentioned reading in their fun facts, and this could be a real asset for Marina, as 72-year-old men typically love to read biographies. Maybe they can bond over American Prometheus.

1. Sandra, 75

—Sandra says anything by Luther Vandross puts her in “the mood.”

—Sandra is very proud of her high credit score.

—Sandra has 32 favorite NFL teams, AKA she loves all of them.

Three exemplary facts! Each one is actually fun—no filler here. The one about Luther Vandross is just the right amount of naughty. And bragging on her high credit store is naughty too, if you think about it—the other great taboo in American society! She’s busting down barriers all over the place. And while I sincerely disliked the movie 80 for Brady, even I can admit that there’s something charming about a 75-year-old woman being a big football fan. We shall see if Gerry agrees.