Being grateful for the years learning while in Singapore
This morning at breakfast, I mentioned to my husband John that my regular article for the Monroe News was due today. “Why not write about gratitude?” he asked. “EVERYONE is writing about gratitude. It’s the Thanksgiving season!” was my response.
I then started to think about what gratitude meant. Author Diana Butler Bass, in her insightful text “Grateful,” begins her book by quoting a French proverb: “Gratitude is the memory of the heart.” What are some of my ‘memories of the heart” to which I am grateful?
One of the most difficult memories I have had was attending Trinity Theological College in Singapore. For my two years at Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary’s Master of Divinity program in Evanston, Illinois, I spent my weeks alternating between intensive and joy filled academic work during the week and then happily returning each weekend to Grand Rapids to be with my then-husband, who was managing a furniture factory there. I had been ordained as a Deacon in the United Methodist Church. We had submitted adoption applications and were awaiting a match, which would probably happen in 1 to 3 years.
One weekend, my then-husband shocked me in sharing that he had been recruited to take a position as a quality control manager in a Singaporean furniture factory. He wanted to take the job. Both of us had dreams of living outside the U.S. for a time. It would be a great adventure! But NOW?
One of my professors at Garrett-Evangelical discovered there WAS a seminary in Singapore that I could attend that would meet the academic standards for credit transfer back to graduate. I could finish my classes at Trinity Theological College. I could complete Field Education in a Singaporean Methodist church. With major anxieties combined with wonder, we sold our home, packed our bags and took a 30-hour plane trip to the “Lion City.”
I found myself sitting on a bus going to downtown Singapore, counting the stops to where Trinity was then located. Amid the swirl of languages, scents and colors, I found myself approaching panic. What if I missed the stop? What if I couldn’t find the school? What if …?
I did find Trinity, then perched onto Mt. Sophia, one of the highest points in downtown. As I walked into my first Chapel service, I soon discovered that I was the only American, the only Caucasian and the only ordained woman in their Master of Divinity program. Surveying the syllabi in my classes, I felt like as a total outsider. How could I contemplate Christian ministry in Asia authentically? What business did I have even being there?
I soon discovered that I had much to learn and much to share. Many of my fellow students were as curious and anxious about me as I was about them. Some of the lecturers previously had poor experiences with Western students and (as I later found out) did not want me admitted to the college.
But there were also allies who became dear friends. My Field Education placement was with the Dr. Rev. Lorna Khoo, the first woman ordained in any Christian denomination in Singapore. I found nurture in a “family” group, directed by my academic advisor Dr. Wu, who helped me connect with eight other students as we met weekly together for meals, support and prayer. The academic and spiritual foundations I received at Garrett Evangelical were fundamental in helping me be open and curious about this new place and what God had to show me.
My favorite photo of my graduation from Garrett Evangelical in 1996 has me in my cap and gown, holding my 2-year-old daughter Kara in my arms, adopted through the Singapore Court System. I remained in Asia for a total of nine years finding God opening doors for ministry in continually amazing ways.
Was living outside my comfort zone difficult and sometimes painful? Oh, yes. Did it shake my cultural and theological foundations and show me new viewpoints on everything I had assumed was normative? Oh, yes. Looking back I wouldn’t change it. I am truly grateful for this memory of my heart.
Melodye Surgeon VanOudheusden is the pastor of St. Paul's United Methodist Church in Monroe. She can be reached at pastormelodyevano@gmail.com.
This article originally appeared on The Monroe News: Being grateful for the years learning while in Singapore
