Cannibal teens, Pinhead and more film freaks to see out of Fantastic Fest

Horror, crime, sci-fi, haunted 1980s variety shows: We saw it all at Fantastic Fest 2022, which came to Alamo Drafthouse South Lamar from Sept. 22-29. Here's a rundown of the best and worst to look out for in theaters (and on streaming).

‘The Menu’

If "The Menu" was a conceptual meal (and in many ways it is), the theme would be clear: Yeet the rich.

In Mark Mylod's film, a group of rich and powerful types all converge upon an exclusive island restaurant. There, the chef (Ralph Fiennes) has a disturbingly personal menu planned, with a fatal final course. There was one ingredient he didn't account for, though: a mysterious plus-one who's never breathed rarefied air (Anya Taylor-Joy).

The deadly satire of the fine dining world works mostly because the flavors all complement each other. The script is given to actors giving spectacular, precisely observed performances. Pity the poor sap who recognizes themselves in Nicholas Hoult's insecure gastronomy tourist.

All parties are fair game, both the monomaniacal chefs losing their humanity to the "art" of the dish and the callous dilettantes who could solve world hunger if they pooled their money but instead choose to eat scallops for sport.

At its best, "The Menu" feels like "Clue" with more perfectly plated bone marrow. Do they give Michelin stars for movies?

In theaters Nov. 18.

Grade: A-

Read the full review:'The Menu' is a serve

‘Give Me Pity!’

Media formats of the past will always bring us both warm nostalgia and chilled disquiet. Take the 1980s variety special pastiche “Give Me Pity!” — on the one hand, the VHS grain, sequin-born lens flares and presentational mania of star Sissy St. Clair (Sophie von Haselberg, aka Bette Midler’s daughter, aka a complete dynamo) provoke a chuckle, and a sigh for all the years gone by since you might have seen such a thing on TV.

But then, it becomes a variety show from the lower reaches of Tartarus, without losing any of that cheesy style. A sinister man in a fright mask haunts the cheerily narcissistic Sissy from the fringes, until the very fabric of this lost extravaganza starts to warp. An extended late-night-style impression segment from actor Cricket Arrison is a scream (both from humor and terror).

Dis. Quiet.

The descent into madness might descend a hair too long. But as I told anyone I talked to about director Amanda Kramer’s hallucination: This is precisely my (expletive).

Grade: A-

More:Alamo Drafthouse at 25 years: A history of cult classics and queso

‘Decision To Leave’

South Korean master Park Chan-wook spins his plates so precisely that you’re never quite sure how you could possibly add anything of substance to the conversations around his films, given the limits of human perception. But to try: “Decision To Leave” sees Park go noir, with an elaborate tale of an overworked detective and a bad-news lady who’s got a hold on his heart as much as his mind.

Viewers most familiar with the twisty plots and twisted mindsets of “Oldboy” and “The Handmaiden” will mostly find the former here; “Decision To Leave” is a pretty grounded murder mystery with just a little bit of outrageousness peeking through. Not a knock. It’s darn funny, too.

That’s not to say the film isn’t swimming in meaning: In this world, the most beautiful things, from the sea to love itself, have it in their nature to destroy.

In theaters Oct. 14.

Grade: A

‘Lynch/Oz’

What could be better for a Fantastic Fest crowd than an anthology of video essays juxtaposing the work of film’s most disturbing master, David Lynch, with the most disturbing musical of Hollywood’s golden age, “The Wizard of Oz”? Over six chapters of solely archival footage, director Alexandre O. Philippe invites filmmakers — Karyn Kusama! David Lowery! John Waters! — to poke at that particular flying monkey from every different angle.

For fans of Lynch, it’s a euphoric experience to trace the overt “Oz” references in “Wild at Heart” to the dimensional transcendence of “Mullholland Drive” to the ever-present curtains in the director’s work — “Twin Peaks,” “Eraserhead,” you name it. (And you know that you’re not supposed to peek behind that curtain.)

Is it all a bit academic? Sure, and you could say it’s not the most accessible. But anyone fascinated by the place from where artists derive inspiration will love “Lynch/Oz.”

Grade: A-

More Fantastic Fest:'Smile'? Polite smirk will do

‘Bones and All’

Yes, the Timothee Chalamet cannibal movie. To say nothing of Armie Hammer, the gorgeous, devastating and dirty “Bones and All” is the most disturbing movie I’ve seen in some time.

In a 1980s American wasteland, young Lee and Maren (Chalamet and Taylor Russell) travel the road, hungry for each other and the human flesh that their supernatural nature compels them to devour. The world, you might guess, ain’t cut out for two cannibals in love.

Director Luca Guadagnino, a master of sensuality and envelope nudging, plays this bizarre premise quite straight and loses none of his romantic tendencies, which makes it even more jarring when Elio from “Call Me By Your Name” starts snacking on skin. (Mark Rylance and Michael Stuhlbarg give honestly bonkers turns as fellow “eaters” met on the road, adding to the twitchiness.)

It’s apparent that “Bones and All” is working in the realm of metaphor, particularly that of queer experience and life for any souls on the margins. The effectiveness of comparing those vulnerable people’s experiences to cannibals — well, can’t say I love it.

I also don’t think I could say whether I liked or didn’t like this one. But boy, did it stick with me.

In theaters Nov. 23.

Grade: B

‘Medusa Deluxe’

My great disappointment of Fantastic Fest 2022: a murder mystery set in the world of competitive hair shows. That premise is irresistible, and yet director Thomas Hardiman’s feature opts for dishwater blonde instead of striking platinum. Filmed in single-take style, with characters passing focus like a baton, there are striking performances in “Medusa Deluxe.” Clare Perkins as the ferocious stylist Cleve and Luke Pasqualino as fussy widower Angel shine, in particular.

But even at only 1 hour, 40 minutes, this one felt interminable and dull, disappointingly murky and void of suspense. Slice of life can be fun, but it’s gotta be a slice with style.

It's expected to hit theaters later this year.

Grade: C

‘Hellraiser’

Listen up, sickos. Pinhead’s back, she’s a lady now, and the rebooted “Hellraiser” is queer as hell (which is raised yet again). Director David Bruckner’s take on the demonic franchise casts Jamie Clayton as the head priest of the mutilated, torturous Cenobites, and if you’re looking to wince in delight, here’s your film.

The pattern remains the same: A young woman (Odessa A’zion), addicted to both drugs and wreaking havoc in the lives of her friends and family, chances upon a mysterious puzzle box. Unlike a Rubik’s cube, each configuration of this game summons a crew of supernatural beings looking to dust off some techniques deemed too garish for the Spanish Inquisition.

“Hellraiser” doesn’t renovate cinematic hell too radically. The beats are almost comforting, if you love a creature feature, including plenty of “don’t go in that door” moments for the viewer. Clayton’s phenomenal, and A’zion gives a fun if occasionally grating final-girl turn. The CGI gets a little made-for-TV by the end — hey, it’s a Hulu movie — but “Hellraiser” is the Halloween party feature you’re waiting for.

Streaming on Hulu on Oct. 7.

Grade: B

This article originally appeared on Austin American-Statesman: Best, worst of Fantastic Fest 2022, from Bones and All to Hellraiser