College football is back in NC. Enjoy this version of the sport, while it lasts

And ... we’re back.

First full weekend of regular season college football since late last November. That’s about nine full months of waiting, give or take. About 278 days. Not that anyone’s been counting.

So let’s see here, what’d we miss between then and now?

Ah, yes. There it is: the continuing destruction of the sport (and college athletics at large) as we’ve come to know it. The Big 12 continues its absorption of schools the Big Ten and SEC doesn’t exactly want (while those two leagues, themselves, continue to grow larger).

The Pac-12 is mostly dead but, on the bright side, that means it’s slightly alive. Miracle Max explained the mostly-dead phenomenon in The Princess Bride and it’s helpful to know such things in these days of mostly-dead, slightly-alive conference realignment dynamics. So here it is again:

“There’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well — with all dead there’s usually only one thing you can do.”

“What’s that?” Inigo Montoya asks.

“Go through his clothes and look for loose change.”

Well, considering that, perhaps the Pac-12 really is all dead. For the rummaging-through-clothes scavenging has commenced, with the ACC perhaps, maybe, possibly ready (or not?) to add Stanford and Cal — given that the collection of loose change in the pockets of those two schools is larger than poor (literally and figuratively) cast-offs Washington State and Oregon State.

That the ACC is even considering this is reflective of its worry — justified, it should be noted — that it’s only a matter of time before its pockets endure a good plundering on behalf of richer, greedier leagues. And they’re not going to wait for the slightly-alive phase, either. The day is coming, unless there’s some sort of reckoning and will among conference commissioners and school presidents to work together for the good of all. (A humorous thought, indeed.)

Does any of what’s going on in college athletics make sense? That the Pac-12 is mostly (or all) dead; that the Big Ten now spans (or will, soon enough) Piscataway, N.J., to the Puget Sound? That the ACC, desperate and fearful to varying degrees of both, is even considering adding two schools from the greater San Francisco Bay Area? And let us not forget the league’s other expansion candidate, Southern Methodist.

No, nothing particularly sensical about any of that.

Is any of this in any way good for the fans who allowed college football to become the enterprise it is? Well, of course not. But, sorry fans, nobody asked you. And besides, there’s plenty of old rivalry games you can watch on YouTube, reminiscing about the good ol’ days, while the powers-that-be are over there counting their money and considering which Frankensteinian conference concoction might generate another tenth of a ratings point, and a few more dollars.

If all of this doesn’t get you pumped for college football season, I don’t know what will. But no, really, moral of the story here is this: Enjoy this season while it lasts. Because it is indeed very likely to be among the last of college football seasons as we’ve come to know the sport. And here in North Carolina, especially, the current iteration of the game grows more endangered given the forces surrounding it.

North Carolina and N.C. State in different conferences? Could be coming. The Big Four, in four different leagues? Not as far-fetched as it ever seemed a year or two ago. A much more difficult path to relevancy for the likes of Appalachian State and East Carolina? Yes. Even more difficult than it is now. We don’t know when college football will reach its maximum state of implosion. Only that everything happening in college sports right now guarantees it’s coming.

So embrace this version of the sport while it still exists.

One big thing

Carolina vs. Carolina. Or is it ... Carolina vs. Carolina. Which is the real, true Carolina? Wrote about this earlier this week, in a well-received (dare I say) story about the eternal conflict between the two Carolinas, and the never-ending debate about who owns the true rights to the original name of our dear English settlement. The football game between North Carolina and South Carolina in Charlotte on Saturday night will decide the issue, once and for all, for about one minute. And then we can go back to arguing. It’s what we do. (Oh, and, obviously, North Carolina wins if we’re just talking about the states. Come on.)

Realignment rumblings

A new feature to this space. Every week we’ll have some fun with the hottest topic in college athletics these days: conference realignment. So here goes:

OK, hear me out. About how a conference near the Atlantic Ocean, full of like-minded schools with similar athletic programs, with shared borders that would allow for geographic rivalries; a mix of schools public and private of roughly similar size stretching from, say, Maryland through South Carolina. We could call this league the Conference of the Atlantic Coast — still workshopping the name here — and include the most notable schools from the aforementioned states.

A seven-, eight-school conference feels like a good number. To me, this idea has legs.

Three to like

1. A neutral site game of regional significance to start the season. Nothing worse for fans than looking forward to opening weekend for months and when it arrives, the first game is a total dud that’d generate zero buzz if placed anywhere else on the schedule. And there are a lot of season openers like that. So kudos to North Carolina and South Carolina and the Charlotte Sports Foundation — and the good people of Duke’s Mayo — for making the Battle of the Carolinas a reality Saturday.

2. ECU going to the Big House. No fear here. No hesitation from the Pirates, who get things going by just heading up to Michigan to play in front of 100,000-plus people, and against a team with national championship aspirations. Hey, ECU: If App State could get it done in 2007, no reason why you can’t, either. No pressure. What’s that? This Michigan team is a lot better than that Michigan team? Well, details, details.

3. Duke in primetime, with everybody watching. I’m old enough to remember the mid-2000s, when it seemed like every year the executives at ABC and ESPN tried to pretend that Florida State and Miami were still what they were in the 1990s, and put them on national TV on Labor Day night every year (and reader, they were not what they were in the 90s). How far we’ve come, that Duke now has its moment. Duke football fans — and we know you’re out there (right?) — the onus is now on you to fill Wallace Wade on Monday night when Clemson comes rolling into Durham.

Three to ... not like as much

1. The NCAA’s inaction on the Tez Walker case. To the surprise of no one, the NCAA continues to embarrass itself (and that’s as evergreen a sentence as can ever be written). The UNC receiver has been in eligibility purgatory for weeks, waiting on an answer to his appeal. What’s at stake? Only just about everything, for Walker, who was ruled ineligible after transferring twice. His case is unique for a few reasons and his eligibility should be restored. But either way, there’s no reason for this to have dragged out as long as it has.

2. That the ACC’s will-they, won’t-they will drag on into the season. For weeks the conference has been evaluating whether to add Cal, Stanford and SMU. Speculation about whether it happens has been the only thing capturing the attention of people who follow ACC football and, thus, it has overshadowed the start of the season. Dear presidents and chancellors: If you have to take this long to think about saying yes to something, you probably already have your answer.

3. No Saturday afternoon home games among the Big Four. Allow me to go Andy Rooney for minute here and wax poetic about college football belonging to Saturday afternoon. And look: no Saturday afternoon home games for Duke, N.C. State, UNC and Wake Forest. What happened to the good ol’ days, folks? Well, maybe it’s actually not so bad to avoid sitting out in the sun in 90-degree weather.

This week’s ‘best program in the state’

Another new feature to this space. Every week we’ll have some fun thinking about which college football program is the best in North Carolina.

This week’s actual best program in the state? Perhaps a three-way tie, under the criteria outlined in this last season, among App, Wake Forest and N.C. State. But for the purposes of this exercise, we’ll go with Charlotte this week. Why Charlotte? Because it has Biff Poggi as its head coach and nobody else does. Charlotte might not have the best team in the state, or close to it, but it has the most entertaining head coach. Just pull up some clips of the guy and you’ll see.

Carolinas ranking

1. Clemson; 2. North Carolina (but has to show it Saturday); 3. South Carolina (ditto); 4. N.C. State; 5. Duke; 6. Wake Forest; 7. Appalachian State (best of the non-Power conference teams until proven otherwise); 8. ECU; 9. Coastal Carolina; 10. Charlotte.

Final thoughts, in no particular order

▪ I think it’s now or never for North Carolina. You have Drake Maye. The defense has nowhere to go but up. Plenty of support (or should be, anyway) surrounding Maye on offense. If the Tar Heels don’t take the next step this season, you have to wonder if or when it’s ever going to happen. No better proving ground, either, than in Charlotte on Saturday night.

▪ I think North Carolina, the state, might be in for an even better season than last year. And last year was good. Historic, even, with a lot of competitive teams. But collectively it could be even better this season. No real weak teams among any of the top nine FBS programs in the state. And as for Charlotte, well — again. Biff Poggi should at least entertain while he attempts the rebuild.

▪ I think Davius Richard is a name more people should know. He’s back again at quarterback for N.C. Central, and again he stands to be among the best FCS players in the country. Richard could’ve cashed in and “moved up,” but he’s found a great thing at Central, which won the MEAC last year, as well as the HBCU national championship. Amid all the nonsense dominating the news throughout college sports, stories like Richard’s offer a nice reprieve from the (well-earned) cynicism.