COMING TOGETHER: Cancer tightens bonds of Raasch family

Mar. 11—NAPPANEE — The memories are distinct for Mike Raasch.

He was in his kitchen when his wife, Pauline, told him she had cancer for the first time. Three years later, it was on a Saturday during the second quarter of his oldest son's basketball game when he received a call from Pauline's oncologist that they needed to see him as soon as possible. Forty-eight hours later, the news was delivered that cancer had returned.

Pauline's cancer battle has been ongoing for more than six years now. What started as breast cancer has now spread to her liver, femur, hip and spine. She will be starting another round of chemotherapy next week.

Through all of this, the Raasch family has grown closer than they've ever been. They've been able to enjoy each other's successes that much more, including Ian's sectional championship victory as part of the NorthWood boys basketball team last week.

"We, as a family, have allowed this to draw each other closer to one another," Mike said. "And although this may sound odd, in some ways, God has definitely used this trial of cancer to knit us closer as a family than we ever would have if Pauline had never been diagnosed."

INITIAL DIAGNOSIS

It was Jan. 2015 when Pauline first diagnosed with breast cancer. She was only 39 years old at the time, while her three sons — Jacob, Ian and Tyler — were 12, 10 and 8, respectively.

"It was an absolute shock, and our world was turned upside-down," Mike said.

Pauline remembers how difficult it was to tell her children what was going on.

"It was very hard to tell the kids because when you get the diagnosis, you do not know what the future will be and 'cancer' has such a negative connotation," Pauline said.

Mike wasn't sure if his kids fully understood what was going on. Ian remembers the moment, though, and all the emotions of it.

"At first, it was tough, obviously," Ian said. "But you have to face the fact that she has cancer, you have to live with it and know that God has a plan. His will is good."

Faith has played a key role for the Raasch family throughout this journey. Mike has been a pastor at Living Gospel Church in Nappanee for 19 years, making religion a focal point in the Raasch household.

"The boys, Mike and I find great comfort in the hope we have in Jesus Christ," Pauline said. "We know, because of His life-giving sacrifice that all of us will continue to live eternally with Jesus after we leave this current life."

Pauline started treatments for cancer immediately. She did multiple rounds of chemotherapy in the summer of 2015 and continued with follow-up appointments with doctors in the fall of that year. Upon completion of treatments in 2015, it appeared the cancer had been cleared from Pauline's body.

A NEW FAMILY MEMBER

Cancer then added another person to the Raasch family in 2016. Wes Bryan, who had been loosely connected to Mike's church, made a phone call to Mike on the morning of March 7, 2016.

Bryan, who had been battling metastatic lung cancer, told Mike that he woke up and was paralyzed from the waist down. Wes' son, Cody, had already departed for school and asked Mike if he could pick him up from school later that day.

When Mike brought Cody home that day, he became a new member of the family.

Wes Bryan died less than a month later. Cody was soon adopted by the Raasch family and brought in to be a fourth son of Mike and Pauline's. Cody and their youngest son, Tyler, are only separated in age by three weeks.

"It was an instant change for us," Mike said. "These sudden and somewhat unexpected changes to our family were definitely an ongoing challenge, but they have definitely proved to be life-changing and life-transforming for the better."

CANCER RETURNS

It seemed as if the Raasch family had settled in to its "new normal" when Pauline's cancer returned again.

Not only was it back, but it had spread across her body. Cancer was found in her spine, femur and hip upon re-diagnosis in 2018.

"When I was re-diagnosed, I was not really surprised because I was experiencing pain in my hip and leg, but I was sad," Pauline said. "I learned from past experience that it's OK to be sad, but focusing on the negative doesn't improve the situation."

The cancer wouldn't go away easily this time. In Jan. 2020, doctors found the cancer was continuing to spread across her spine and now into her liver. The family had to make multiple trips to a Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota for treatment options. She was put on a clinical trial in Sept. 2020, and four months later, she was told the trial wasn't working for her anymore.

Pauline has been doing IV chemotherapy sessions since February. Just as it has through her first battle with cancer, her faith has guided her through the trials and tribulations of the past three years.

"Jesus Christ has been key for our family during the last six years," Pauline said. "I know God loves my family immensely more than I do, so whatever He has planned is best. I have become more dependent on my Lord, recognizing that He is ultimately in control of every aspect of our lives, including how many days we have together as a family."

LIVING WITH CANCER

Jacob, Ian, Tyler and Cody are now 18, 16, 14 and 14 years old, respectively. Cancer has been something in their lives since they were all pre-teens. Despite the emotional obstacles cancer has brought on the children, Mike has seen his kids thrive through it.

"I am incredibly proud and impressed with how our boys have handled this," Mike said. "And I know I'm speaking as a proud dad, but their character and their ability to process what's going on and not allow it to make them feel bitter or angry has been incredible to me."

Basketball has been the sport of choice for the Raasch family during this time. Jacob played through his sophomore year (2019) at NorthWood, and Ian is currently a sophomore on the Panthers' squad. After being a role player off the bench a season ago, the 6-5 forward has blossomed into a key starter for NorthWood in 2021. Ian is second on the team in points-per-game (10.8) and leads in rebounds-per-game (6.1).

"Ian is extremely versatile ... I feel like the sky's the limit, but I think defensively, he's grown into a player that can defend multiple positions," NorthWood coach Aaron Wolfe said. "There's been games where he's been able to switch ball screens and also contain the other team's best player, which is so beneficial to your basketball team."

Along with individual success, Ian has now been on back-to-back sectional championship winning teams. He grabbed a huge offensive rebound and sank three free throws in the final 90 seconds of the Panthers' 46-40 victory over West Noble in last week's sectional title game.

Despite going through cancer treatments, Pauline has been able to attend most of Ian's games this season. The whole family, minus Cody, was on hand to watch Ian help his team cut down the nets in Ligonier Saturday.

"I love being able to support Ian in any way I can," Pauline said. "Basketball is a big part of his life currently and having the opportunity to attend his games is something I do not take for granted. I know these experiences are creating wonderful memories for us all."

Ian knows how fortunate he is to have a loving family like his.

"Just having not only my mom, but family there to support me — they support me in pretty much everything I do, and it's something I probably take for granted," Ian said. "It helps me appreciate it even more."

For Wolfe, seeing the Raasch family come together over the past six years makes him emotional.

"I think it's been difficult to watch from the outside because you understand how close-knit of a family they are," Wolfe said. "Watching Pauline and just watching her internal toughness to where — she's been a great mother, and watching her support her boys when it has to be difficult just pulls on your heartstrings. But you also look at her with admiration.

"And then to watch Mike support his wife through difficult times is touching, but also, you just admire at how they've handled this as a family."

Now, Ian and the rest of his team are preparing to play in the New Castle regional Saturday. Regardless of what happens on the court this weekend, Mike is happy with how Ian has handled everything since Jan. 2015.

"I was pretty proud of (Ian), not only to endure some of the trials of the basketball season, but I know some of the trials that are going on at home and the challenges of battling cancer," Mike said. "... I keep reminding Ian that, as a dad, I am proud of you. Win or lose, I am proud of you, and my love and my pride in you does not change whatsoever."

Austin Hough can be reached at austin.hough@goshennews.com or at 574-538-2360. Follow him on Twitter at @AustinHoughTGN.