Before You Complain About Your Body, Think About This

Academic studies can be fascinating... and totally confusing. So we decided to strip away all of the scientific jargon andbreak them down for you.

The Background

Whether it's a woman complaining about the size of her thighs or saying she's "so bad" for having that extra cookie she had at lunch, "fat talk" is oftena regular pat of women's daily conversations. According to a 2011 survey,93 percent of college-aged women engage in this type of disparaging commentary about their bodies and the bodies of others, endorsing the idea that thinner is always better. Fat talk has beenlinked with body dissatisfaction, especially forthose who engage in it themselves, but also for those who hear their friends' negative comments. The question is: How bad is fat talk for women, especially in the context of friendship?

Researchers from University of Queensland were among the first to study fat talk among actual friends, andtheir new study explores its affects on women's mental health as well as their social dynamics.

The Setup

The researchers gathered 43 pairs of friends between the ages of 17 and 25 and told them that they'd be participating in a study about communication on social media (not fat talk). Each friend pair was separated and instructed to discuss 20 celebrity images over an instant messenger program. They were told that they'd be randomly assigned to chat their friend first or second. If they were second, that meant that they'd reply to their friend's comment about the celebrity. But in reality, all participants were told to be the second one to chat, and the researchers sent them pre-selected comments that were either considered fat talk ( "She looks great after losing all that weight"), positive body talk ("Love that skirt, would look amazing on me!") or neutral ("Such a great actress").

After that, participants completed a survey that measured their body image, mood, their intentions to diet, and how much they had internalized the thin ideal. The survey also asked them to report how often they engaged in fat talk with their friends, and how they felt about the friend partnered with them in the study.

The Findings

After analyzing survey results, the researchers found that the correlates of disordered eating (like thin-ideal internalization, body dissatisfaction, poor mood and dieting intentions) were significantly higher for those whose "friend" chatted them with fat talk. In this study, however, merely listening (or reading, in this case) a friend's negative commentary only affected well-being if the person responded with fat talk, too.

Talking about bodies didn't always lead to negative consequences though. Those whose "friend" chatted positively about bodies, on the other hand, showed no increased risk. In fact, out of the three types of talk, positive body talk was considered the most "socially acceptable." Participants rated this type of chat positively, even if the norm in their friend circle was to engage in fat talk.

The Takeaway

While it may seem harmless to look at a photo of Jennifer Lawrence and joke to a friend, "I'd neverbe able to wear that," this study suggests that it could actually be pretty bad for your self-esteem -- and your friend's, if she chimes in with her own negative body talk.

Fat talk is the norm in many women's friend circles, so it might seem daunting to deviate from that social formula, sitting silently as your friend jokingly berates herself for ordering dessert or even --gasp-- expressing that you actually like your body the way it is. But knowing how bad it is for everyone involved can serve as motivation to avoid fat talk and maybe even say something nice about your own figure. After all, participants across the board appreciated positive body talk.

When it comes to talking about your body -- or anyone's body -- perhaps it's best to remember the old adage: If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

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Gina Rodriguez

The Golden-Globe winner <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/21/gina-rodriguez-body-image_n_7104118.html" target="_blank">told HuffPost Live</a> how her father shaped her perspective on beauty: <blockquote>Beauty was very much on my mind. I had a father that would -- we would look up at billboards and he would say, "That's one version of beauty. You're another version of beauty. And she's a version of beauty. And that girl? She's another version of beauty." He always said that beauty came from within, and as much as you're younger and you're [sarcastically] like, "Yeah, beauty comes from within" -- no, beauty does come from within. I've met some of the most beautiful people, and sadly their heart is just not smiling, and that destroys it all. And then other people that aesthetically aren't considered as beautiful are the most gorgeous people I've ever seen in my life.</blockquote>

Lady Gaga

After the media focused on her <a href="http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-body/news/lady-gaga-shows-off-25-pound-weight-gain-in-tight-outfit-2012229">alleged weight gain</a> in September 2012, Gaga hit back at critics by baring her body in photographs, sharing her struggles with an eating disorder, and inviting her fans to join her in a <a href="http://www.forbes.com/sites/melaniehaiken/2012/09/26/lady-gaga-puts-bulimia-and-body-image-on-the-table-in-a-big-way/">"body revolution."</a>

Adele

Adele says she <a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504803_162-57376080-10391709/adele-talks-about-her-body-image-and-weight/">tries not to worry</a> about her body image and doesn't want to be a "skinny minnie."   "The first thing to do is be happy with yourself and appreciate your body -- only then should you try to change things about yourself."

Rebel Wilson

The actress <a href="https://twitter.com/RebelWilson/status/253324823005118465">took to Twitter</a> to say, "I'm not trying to be hot. I'm just trying to be a good actress and entertain people."
The actress took to Twitter to say, "I'm not trying to be hot. I'm just trying to be a good actress and entertain people."

Margaret Cho

In a powerful 2012 <a href="http://jezebel.com/5875219/cho-mad-twitter" target="_blank">piece for Jezebel</a>, the comedian responded to people who criticized her appearance: <blockquote>I grew up hard and am still hard and I don't care. I did not choose this face or this body and I have learned to live with it and love it and celebrate it and adorn it with tremendous drawings from the greatest artists in the world and I feel good and powerful like a nation that has never been free and now after many hard won victories is finally fucking free. I am beautiful and I am finally fucking free.</blockquote>

Ashley Judd

After the March 2012 frenzy around Judd's "puffy face," the actress fought back in <a href="http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/04/09/ashley-judd-slaps-media-in-the-face-for-speculation-over-her-puffy-appearance.html">The Daily Beast</a>, calling the media out for making women's bodies "a source of speculation, ridicule, and invalidation, as if they belong to others."

Danielle Brooks

The "Orange Is The New Black" actress wrote a <a href="http://www.glamour.com/inspired/blogs/the-conversation/2015/05/danielle-brooks-body" target="_blank">powerful essay for Glamour</a> about her struggles with self-esteem and journey to body love. She's now dedicated to making sure all body types are seen on-screen: "Ideally, I want to see all beauties, all shapes, all sizes, all skin tones, all backgrounds represented in my profession. Now that I am blessed to be that reflection I was once looking for, I’m making a promise to speak out for that little girl that I used to be."

Allison Tate

Tate's <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/allison-tate/mom-pictures-with-kids_b_1926073.html">essay</a> about body image and motherhood not only broke the Internet; it has sparked a movement of "moms who stay in the picture."
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Autumn Whitefield Madrano

On her informed, thoughtful blog <a href="http://www.the-beheld.com/">"The Beheld,"</a> Autumn writes about beauty, body image, appearance and her two -- that's right, <em>two </em>-- mirror fasts.
On her informed, thoughtful blog "The Beheld," Autumn writes about beauty, body image, appearance and her two -- that's right, two -- mirror fasts.

Kjerstin Gruys

Gruys went on a year-long<a href="http://www.ayearwithoutmirrors.com/"> mirror fast</a> during which she did not study her reflection in mirrors or other reflective surfaces, or look at photographs of herself.
Gruys went on a year-long mirror fast during which she did not study her reflection in mirrors or other reflective surfaces, or look at photographs of herself.

Christina Aguilera

"I am always in support of someone who is willing and comfortable in their own skin enough to embrace it," the singer said in a<a href="http://www.ianslive.in/index.php?param=news/Aguilera_wants_to_empower_women-389922/ENTERTAINMENT/15"> recent interview</a>.

Lena Dunham

At the 2012 New Yorker Festival, the magazine's TV critic, Emily Nussbaum, asked Lena Dunham, producer, creator and star of the hit HBO show "Girls," why <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/08/lena-dunham-new-yorker-festival-emily-nussbaum_n_1948596.html?utm_hp_ref=women&ir=Women">Dunham is naked in so many scenes</a>. Dunham responded, "I realized that what was missing in movies for me was the presence of bodies I understood." She said she plans to live until she is 105 and show her thighs every day.

Stella Boonshoft

The NYU student started the amazing <a href="http://thebodyloveblog.tumblr.com/">Body Love Blog</a>, where she posted this picture of herself and wrote an <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/stella-boonshoft/self-portrait-ask-me-why-_b_1987406.html" target="_hplink">open letter to those who feel entitled to shame others</a> for the size or look of their bodies.

Beth Ditto

This 5-foot-tall, 200-pound singer spoke openly about her weight to <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/01/beth-ditto-talks-skinny-privilege-fiancee-body-image_n_2057290.html?utm_hp_ref=women&ir=Women">The Advocate</a>, saying, "I feel sorry ... for people who've had skinny privilege and then have it taken away from them. I have had a lifetime to adjust to seeing how people treat women who aren't their idea of beautiful and therefore aren't their idea of useful, and I had to find ways to become useful to myself."

Mindy Kaling

In 2013 <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/26/mindy-kaling-body-image-parade_n_3991509.html" target="_blank">interview with Parade</a>, Kaling said that she was tired of being discussing her appearance: "I always get asked, 'Where do you get your confidence?' I think people are well meaning, but it's pretty insulting. Because what it means to me is, 'You, Mindy Kaling, have all the trappings of a very marginalized person. You're not skinny, you're not white, you're a woman. Why on earth would you feel like you're worth anything?'"