A Complete Timeline of Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga's Feud

Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga attend the opening night of 2019 BravoCon at Hammerstein Ballroom on November 15, 2019 in New York City
Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga attend the opening night of 2019 BravoCon at Hammerstein Ballroom on November 15, 2019 in New York City
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Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty

Costars and sisters-in-law Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga have had a hot-and-cold relationship for years.

Fans of The Real Housewives of New Jersey have watched the ebbs and flows of the feud for more than a decade, with one of the earliest onscreen flareups happening when Melissa's husband Joe Gorga, who is also Teresa's brother, called Teresa "garbage." Since then, Melissa and Teresa have traded insults in between uneasy stretches of peace for family's sake.

Teresa has accused Melissa of being a gold digger and of cheating on her brother, both of which Melissa denies. The pair temporarily called a truce when Teresa was imprisoned for fraud, but things between them began to decline again in the years that followed.

In 2022, Melissa and her husband decided not to attend Teresa's wedding to Luis "Louie" Ruelas after Teresa betrayed them while filming season 13 of RHONJ, according to a source.

Ahead, read a complete timeline of Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga's ongoing feud.

May 16, 2011: Melissa joins Teresa and the cast of The Real Housewives of New Jersey in season 3

Joe Gorga and Teresa Giudice attend the release party for Melissa Gorga's new single "On Display" at Hudson Terrace on August 12, 2011 in New York City
Joe Gorga and Teresa Giudice attend the release party for Melissa Gorga's new single "On Display" at Hudson Terrace on August 12, 2011 in New York City

Steve Mack/Getty

While Teresa had been a cast member since season 1, RHONJ fans first met Melissa in the third season of the reality show. In the season premiere, which aired on May 16, 2011, and was aptly titled "In The Name of the Father," Teresa's brother and Melissa's husband Joe Gorga called Teresa "garbage" at his son's christening. The comment led to a brawl between Joe Gorga and Teresa's then-husband Joe Giudice.

While Melissa and Teresa didn't directly interact in the clip, the episode later revealed that Teresa believed Melissa was taking her brother away from her. Teresa also didn't visit Melissa and the baby in the hospital following his birth and she threw away cookies that Melissa had gifted her for Christmas.

Following the premiere, Teresa and Melissa both spoke to PEOPLE about the now-infamous fight. "I totally blacked out after my brother told me to get out of his face or whatever he said. It's sad that my children were there; it's sad that my parents were there," said Teresa.

"I think the root of a lot of our problems is just that if Teresa says black, I say white," Melissa shared with PEOPLE. "We may seem similar but we are extremely different people."

June 24, 2011: Teresa accuses Melissa of being a gold digger

Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga attend the "Real Housewives Of New Jersey" Season Six Premiere Party on July 13, 2014 in Parsippany, New Jersey
Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga attend the "Real Housewives Of New Jersey" Season Six Premiere Party on July 13, 2014 in Parsippany, New Jersey

Manny Carabel/Getty

Teresa made it clear that she didn't trust her sister-in-law when she called Melissa a gold digger on the show. Melissa later told E! News that she was hurt by the accusation.

She said, "Joe and I have been married for seven years and have three kids. We went through a time where we couldn't even buy diapers. We had to sell every house we lived in ... Did I go anywhere? Would I ever? No. It hurts me that she would even put that out there, to put that in someone's head. And it doesn't even hurt me as bad as it hurts her brother."

April 23, 2012: Teresa accuses Melissa of cheating on Joe

Melissa Gorga, Teresa Giudice
Melissa Gorga, Teresa Giudice

Andrei Jackamets/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal

The cookbook author continued to spread rumors about Melissa on the reality show. In April 2012, Melissa responded to Teresa's claims that she had cheated on her husband.

As she wrote on BravoTV, "What if Joe listened to her and came home yelling and arguing with me in front of my kids, is that what she wanted? Leave him for a richer man? Really? Come on, evidently I have no idea what I was dealing with here, but I do think it's very clear to everyone what she is trying to do, so I'm not going to get into it that much. I think watching me and Joe it's quite obvious how we feel about each other."

July 2013: Joe Giudice and Joe Gorga get into a fistfight over Teresa

Teresa Giudice, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Melissa Gorga
Teresa Giudice, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Melissa Gorga

Patrick Harbron/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal

The feud took on a new dimension in 2013 when Joe Giudice and Joe Gorga got into a fistfight in season 7 of RHONJ. The fight began when Teresa told her husband that her brother called her "scum." Melissa was thrown against a window as she pleaded with Teresa to get help.

2013: Teresa, Melissa and their families reunite ahead of Teresa's time in prison

Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga appear on NBC News' "Today" show
Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga appear on NBC News' "Today" show

Peter Kramer/NBC/NBC Newswire/NBCUniversal

It seemed a truce was temporarily called in 2013 when Teresa and her husband were both sentenced to terms in prison. As reported by PEOPLE in July 2013, the two were indicted on federal fraud charges, including conspiracy to commit mail and wire fraud, bank fraud, making false statements on loan applications and bankruptcy fraud.

Teresa ended up serving an 11-month sentence, and the Gorgas were there to take care of her four daughters during that time.

2015: Teresa and Melissa make a pact not to fight

When Teresa was released from prison in 2015, she and Melissa agreed to bury their feud.

"I just want us to get back to how we were when you first met Joey," Teresa told Melissa in season 7. "I feel the same way," Melissa added.

July 7, 2016: Teresa and Melissa unite against Jacqueline Laurita

Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice walk the red carpet on October 15, 2016 in Uncasville, Connecticut
Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice walk the red carpet on October 15, 2016 in Uncasville, Connecticut

Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty

The sisters-in-law had a common enemy in castmate Jacqueline Laurita the following year. The two spoke to E! News about what happened with Laurita ahead of the release of season 7 of their show. Teresa said that she and Laurita were on the outs and explained, "I think that my relationship totally changes this season, with her, completely. And it was pretty shocking and I think she tried to be hurtful in certain situations."

Melissa then added, "I think [our trip to] Vermont is [a] big turning point. When we go away on the girls' trip, it was a big turning point for me, for my and Jacqueline's relationship. It took my rose-colored glasses off and it was like really seeing someone in front of me that I didn't see before."

May 19, 2017: Teresa opens a restaurant with Melissa and Joe

Teresa Giudice, Joe Gorga and Melissa Gorga attend the Gorga's Homemade Pasta & Pizza Grand Opening on May 18, 2017 in East Hanover, New Jersey
Teresa Giudice, Joe Gorga and Melissa Gorga attend the Gorga's Homemade Pasta & Pizza Grand Opening on May 18, 2017 in East Hanover, New Jersey

Paul Zimmerman/Getty

Teresa and Melissa were still on good terms in 2017 when they opened Gorga's Homemade Pizza & Pasta together. The two teamed up on the restaurant with Joe Gorga, who told PEOPLE, "My mother loved to cook; it was like her drug. I always told her I was gonna open up a restaurant for her. Then I got busy. While I signed a contract on this place we lost her. So this is for her."

January 2018: Teresa and Melissa's restaurant shuts down

Unfortunately, Gorga's Homemade Pizza & Pasta didn't stay open long. During an interview with The Morning Breath, Melissa explained, "I can speak about it mildly because it's a major situation, unfortunately. I will admit one thing: We are overwhelmed with the amount of people that are going. We had no idea it was going to be as busy as it is; that's first of all."

She added, "Second of all, yes, there are partners, obviously, that we've gone into it with. We were having issues with the management and the way they were running it. There were a couple shady things going on."

November 2018: Teresa tells Melissa to "control" her husband

Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga
Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga

Charles Sykes/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal

By November 2018, Teresa and Melissa were at odds again when Teresa accused her brother and Melissa's husband of not making enough time for his family. Teresa ended up telling Melissa she needed to "control her husband."

January 30, 2019: Teresa and Melissa choose opposite sides during a RHONJ cast fight

On season 9 of the reality show, the cast took a girls' trip to Mexico. However, during one dinner fellow costars Margaret Josephs and Danielle Staub got into an explosive fight, prompting Melissa and Teresa to take opposing sides.

Melissa tried to defend Josephs, while Teresa tried to defend Staub — new Housewife Jennifer Aydin even broke a glass and pointed it at Melissa.

"Teresa, this one's got you going in circles," Melissa said, referencing Staub. "You don't even know what you're saying anymore. You drank the f—ing Kool-Aid."

"You're drinking the Kool-Aid," Teresa replied. "Margaret says something about [Jennifer's] kids, she says something about Danielle. That's f—ing strike three for me. And it's not right. It's not right."

May 19, 2021: Joe Gorga demands a "public apology" from Joe Giudice

During the first part of the season 11 reunion, Joe Gorga told host Andy Cohen that he was still waiting for a "public apology" from Teresa's now-ex-husband, arguing that Giudice landed Teresa in jail.

"So have you been holding back your anger at Joe Giudice for a long time?" Cohen asked Joe, to which he replied, "A long time. An extremely long time. My parents held it in for a long time, because they had four granddaughters that they took care of and they loved. It was a very hard time."

Teresa argued that she'd "done nothing but defend my brother," and that her daughters were upset at how their uncle had talked about their father on the show.

Melissa then chimed in to say that her kids were also affected by the family's public fighting. "The other day, Antonia came into my room with an article, and she's like, 'Mommy, why does [uncle] Joe always write these horrible things about you?' Antonia's reading it too," she said.

At the end of the conversation, Teresa, Melissa and Joe agreed to put it behind them, with Joe telling his sister and wife, "We've made an agreement: it's done. After this we're never gonna say his name again, right?"

November 18, 2021: Teresa and Melissa star in The Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip

The sisters-in-law were both cast in the first season of the Real Housewives crossover series, which premiered on Nov. 18, 2021, on Peacock. In the series, Teresa and Melissa joined fellow Housewives Kyle Richards, Cynthia Bailey, Kenya Moore, Luann de Lesseps and Ramona Singer on a weeklong vacation to Turks and Caicos.

There was tension between Teresa and Melissa on the show, and argued about how Melissa was originally cast on RHONJ. "She was like, 'I'm not signing this paper if you cast my brother [Joe Gorga] and my sister [in-law on the show],' " Melissa claimed of Teresa.

Teresa has asserted that Melissa and Joe never told her they were auditioning for the reality show, although Melissa said she spoke with Teresa about joining the RHONJ cast after producers reached out to her.

March 16, 2022: Teresa does not ask Melissa to be a bridesmaid in her wedding

Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice attend the 2022 MTV Movie & TV Awards: UNSCRIPTED at Barker Hangar in Santa Monica, California and broadcast on June 5, 2022
Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice attend the 2022 MTV Movie & TV Awards: UNSCRIPTED at Barker Hangar in Santa Monica, California and broadcast on June 5, 2022

Jeff Kravitz/Getty

By March 2022, Teresa was planning a wedding with her then-fiancé, Ruelas.

While speaking to Cohen on Watch What Happens Live, Teresa said that Melissa would not be a member of her bridal party. After Cohen asked if Melissa knew, the bride-to-be replied, "Don't make a big deal. I mean, come on."

A few days later, Melissa responded to the news on her podcast, saying, "Yes, I watched Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, and I did find out on TV that I'm not gonna be in Teresa's wedding and I'm not a bridesmaid, which I'm okay with, I'm fine with. I understand, to each their own."

She continued, "I pretty much assumed that, but I guess my big caution is, are her new sisters-in-law in the wedding? Is it a no-fam wedding other than the four daughters? Her four, beautiful daughters and a couple of her friends? If that's the case, that makes perfect sense."

April 20, 2022: Melissa says she and Teresa aren't speaking

Melissa Gorga, Joe Gorga
Melissa Gorga, Joe Gorga

Charles Sykes/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank

Melissa gave several interviews about her relationship with Teresa following season 12 of Real Housewives of New Jersey. During an appearance on WWHL, Melissa said that she and Teresa were not on speaking terms.

May 3, 2022: Melissa says she and Teresa will never be best friends

A few weeks later, Melissa told Extra she and Teresa will never be best friends. As she put it, "I think that everyone was always rooting for us to be besties, but, and I just hate to let everyone down … but it's just, it's not going to happen."

Melissa also said, "I just feel like I've tried for so many years and you know … at some point you have to throw in the towel. You know, at some point you have to say, 'Okay, we're not going to be this, but we're family and we're going to respect each other.' "

May 16, 2022: Teresa and Melissa pledge to stop pretending to like one another

Melissa Gorga, Teresa Giudice
Melissa Gorga, Teresa Giudice

Greg Endries/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank

The "On Display" singer also shared that she and Teresa made a pact to stop pretending they are friends or that they like one another while filming the reunion episode for season 12 of RHONJ.

She said on the Mention It All podcast: "It's okay to say that [Teresa and I] don't have the best relationship and I don't feel guilty saying that because I tried really hard and I know that I tried hard — for my in-laws and for [my husband] Joe [Gorga]."

August 6, 2022: Melissa skips Teresa's wedding

Jill Zarin/Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/p/Cg8ccYUOEJO/?hl=en. Teresa Giudice Wedding
Jill Zarin/Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/p/Cg8ccYUOEJO/?hl=en. Teresa Giudice Wedding

Jill Zarin/Instagram Teresa Giudice

In early August 2022, PEOPLE confirmed that the Gorgas did not attend Teresa's wedding to Ruelas. Two separate sources told PEOPLE that Melissa and Joe had planned to be at the wedding until the Thursday before, when their own marriage was reportedly attacked while filming season 13.

One source said, "Teresa betrayed them in a way that's unforgivable. They're not going to celebrate Teresa's new marriage when all she does is try to tear apart theirs."

August 11, 2022: Melissa and Joe explain why they skipped Teresa's wedding

On an episode of the Melissa Gorga On Display podcast, the couple hinted at a few reasons why they didn't attend Teresa's nuptials and called the decision to skip the wedding "devastating."

"I will let all my listeners know this: obviously, there was something that went down at the [season 13] finale of filming The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Those exact details I obviously cannot say today. Anything that we have filmed is something that I am not able to talk about," said Melissa, before adding that "the full entire story" is not public knowledge at the time.

"I'm not going to sit here and say that there wasn't drama, that it wasn't crazy. Yes, there was a little aggression from certain people that could've been a little scary," she continued.

Joe added, "To me, it was devastating. It really was. It was one of the hardest days of my life. It was bad."

"We supported everyone who went to that wedding," Melissa later shared. "We sent them with love. We truly, honestly, even with everything that happened, we both will always love Teresa very much and hope that she has everything she wants now, and that her girls are happy, and that this is Teresa's happily ever after."

August 17, 2022: Teresa says she was "totally fine" with Melissa and Joe skipping her wedding

During an episode of her Namaste B$tches podcast, Teresa spoke for the first time about her reaction to Joe and Melissa skipping her nuptials.

"I found out a few days before my wedding that they weren't coming. I'm totally fine with it," she shared. "You'll see it play out on TV ... The way that everything played out with my wedding, everything that happened is the way it was supposed to be. I'm all about that. I'm all about good energy, and whoever wanted to be at my wedding was there."

As for why her brother and sister-in-law decided to miss the event, Teresa added, "You'll see it the way it plays out on TV, so I can't really say much on that."

October 15, 2022: Melissa says she's "done" with Teresa

While talking to PEOPLE at BravoCon, Melissa declared that she is "done" with Teresa.

"I got off the roller coaster," she shared. "I don't want to be on it anymore. We'll see what happens."

Melissa added that her focus is on her husband and kids — and not on mending her relationship with Teresa.

"I think that sometimes this goes on. How many times do you want to go in and out, in and out? Eventually you need to protect your immediate family," she explained. "We need to protect our marriage and our children and our life that we live. We can't always just try to put our hands out and it doesn't get reciprocated. We're tired."

January 26, 2023: Teresa and Melissa exchange jabs in RHONJ season 13 taglines

The feud between Melissa and Teresa is far from over — and they made that crystal clear in their season 13 taglines.

"You'll never see how toxic someone is until you breathe fresher air," Melissa said, likely referring to her rocky past with Teresa.

As for Teresa, she took a more direct route when hinting at the family drama.

"Blood may be thicker than water, but it's harder to clean when it spills," she said in a Bravo teaser clip.

February 2, 2023: Melissa addresses not attending Teresa's wedding

During an appearance on Sherri, Melissa talked about the "extremely sad" decision not to attend Teresa's wedding to Luis Ruelas in August 2022.

"I think everyone will see why we made that decision," she said, hinting at the upcoming RHONJ season 13 drama. "That was honestly the best thing for my family at the time. Sometimes you have to say, 'Enough is enough.' It's sad. It's a very sad situation."

Host Sherri Shepherd then asked Melissa if she and Teresa will ever mend their relationship. The reality star responded, "I don't know," before justifying her uncertainty.

"Sometimes when things are super toxic, it's hard to keep fighting that fight," Melissa said. "There comes a time, as we get older, that I need to worry about my children, my family and my relationship with my husband. It can't be so one-sided and selfish."

She continued: "I need to open my eyes sometimes and say, 'What is going to be good for the quality of our lives, and how toxic can you let something get?' "

February 7, 2023: Melissa says the "door's shut" on reconciliation with Teresa

Ahead of the RHONJ season 13 premiere, PEOPLE spoke with Melissa about the future of her relationship with Teresa.

"I mean, the door's shut right now [on a reconciliation]. Just is," she said. "It's exhausting if I'm being honest. I think I say that a lot this season. It's up and down, and in and out, and high and not high. I'm mad, I'm not mad. I'm going to stab you. Just, how about, get away?"

The reality star continued: "That's the point I'm at. I'm comfortable enough in my skin. I am secure enough that I don't feel guilty anymore. I know I've always done the right thing. Not perfect, but I've really tried to help and fix it, so I'm washing my hands now. I'm done. I'm done with the toxic."

Melissa concluded by saying that she and Joe are "done" but that they "wish her family well."

February 21, 2023: Melissa rejects Teresa's request to be a bridesmaid in her wedding on RHONJ

In an episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Teresa and Melissa argued during fellow cast member Danielle Cabral's mozzarella-making party. Teresa accused Melissa of not "rooting for" her and her fiancé before asking, "Listen, do you wanna be in the wedding? I mean if you would love to be a bridesmaid."

Melissa responded, "Well, why are you acting like you're doing me a favor?"

"I would love for you to be a bridesmaid in my wedding. I'm being for real," the bride-to-be insisted.

"I would never go back. It's like an ex boyfriend saying, 'I f----- up. I want you back.' No, you can't f------ have me back," Melissa said.

February 28, 2023: Teresa causes Melissa to cry with "chosen family" comment on RHONJ

During an episode of RHONJ, Joe didn't show up for Teresa's "Love Bubble" party after alluding that he might make an appearance with Melissa.

"I'm kind of frustrated that Joe isn't coming because this is just gonna be the next thing that Teresa decides to hold over his head," Melissa explained in a confessional. "[Teresa will] make him look like the bad guy for not coming."

Melissa predicted correctly. At the party, Teresa made a toast to her "chosen family." The jab at Joe caused Melissa to cry, and she excused herself from the party.

March 14, 2023: Teresa learns her "only option" is to "move on" from drama with Joe

Teresa invited cameras into a session with her therapist, Tegan Sorvino-Quille, during an episode of RHONJ. It was there that Sorvino-Quille asked Teresa to consider letting go of the idea that reconciliation between her and Joe is possible.

"If he doesn't listen, then moving on is your only other option," the therapist said after Teresa shared that she's scared to be around her brother because "his temper is out of control."