I know how Americans think – and they’ll make Trump president again
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I have awaited Donald Trump’s return with mixed feelings. As I complained in a previous column, he still owes me the £20 I lent him for a taxi when he was in London pre his White House sojourn. The man’s a thief and he should be in jail.
Actually, there is nothing in the Constitution to stop a convicted felon from becoming president. In 1920, Eugene V Deb ran for the White House while imprisoned in the Atlanta State Penitentiary for sedition. It was an unsuccessful campaign, largely because Deb was a socialist, which is more of a crime in America than encouraging your supporters to run amok in government buildings. There are surprisingly few barriers to becoming president, as Mr Trump’s career continues to illustrate.
In fact he’s a walking lesson on the Constitution and how ridiculous it has become. A candidate need only be over 35, a “natural born” citizen, and have lived in the US for 14 years. (These last two provisos were to prevent the English from attempting a comeback.)
But the Founding Fathers never foresaw anyone like Donald Trump. I’m weary at the thought of having to think of new names to call him. The Mango Mussolini? The Tangerine Tantrum Thrower? I will bet you all the money he owes me that Trump will become president again.
I’ve lived in America and I know how they think. Where the grass grows high and horned cattle roam the pastures, his words are regarded as occult wisdom.
These sorts of people, who once wore overalls and hickory shirts, loathe conventional career politicians because they think they’re laughing at them. In their presence, the average American feels uneasy. But Trump makes John and Jane Doe feel enfranchised, powerful even.
The Democrats, and many Republicans, have only themselves to blame. They’ve trampled all over the American Dream. You probably think the American Dream is about the nuclear family, a bi-annual Elk Lodge dinner and a Kentucky Bluegrass lawn. Think again. It’s about being an ageing, skanky tycoon who gets to marry a hottie and feel up pneumatic 27-year-olds at the same time. Just ask any biographer of Louis B Mayer.
Of course, a bunch of Americans, primarily from California, will keep reminding us how sacred the Constitution is and how their country is the moral utopia of Mr Smith Goes to Washington, when it’s really the most sex-obsessed, plutocratic nation in history. For every Jimmy Stewart, there are seven Donald Trumps.
