What’s with the crime spree, Boise? Here are the safest (and least safe) cities in Idaho.

Is it me, or does the Treasure Valley suddenly feel like a big, dark alley?

Over the weekend, police investigated a killing in Caldwell, stabbings in Boise and Meridian, and a disruption at a prison near Kuna. Then police shot and killed a Garden City man early Tuesday.

What’s going on, Idaho? Is any place safe in this state anymore? With spring in the air, Boiseans have even discovered that we can’t hike a trail or swing a golf club without worrying about our vehicles being burglarized.

An annual report from SafeWise, “the leading online resource for all things safety and security,” addresses that question. Released only a few weeks ago, the “10 Safest Cities in Idaho 2021” uses FBI crime statistics to try to pinpoint our least dangerous places.

This isn’t a perfect science, but Safewise’s methodology seems reasonable. The analysis ranked 29 Idaho cities based on the number of reported violent crimes and property crimes, and then balanced that with census population data and a survey. “For the purposes of this report,” SafeWise adds, “the terms ‘dangerous’ and ‘safest’ refer explicitly to crime rates as calculated from FBI crime data — no other characterization of any community is implied or intended.”

Either way, I’m steering clear of Garden City.

Kidding! (Sorta.)

So ... Idaho’s safest city? Weiser. Crank up those fiddles and play a happy tune, Washington County. Weiser reported zero violent crimes (aggravated assault, murder, rape, robbery) and zero property crimes (burglary, larceny-theft, motor-vehicle theft) over the 12-month period in the report.

Rounding out the top 10 safest cities, from No. 2 to No. 10? Rexburg, Fruitland, Shelley, Rathdrum, Moscow, Preston, Rupert, Middleton and Hailey.

So which Idaho places are the least safe? To be clear, SafeWise never declares any city as unsafe. They wouldn’t want to offend anyone, right?

But you can guess who finished No. 29.

Sorry, Garden City.

Boise’s grubby little brother is growing hipper with breweries opening and development happening near the Boise River. But Garden City still has some cleaning up to do, at least when it comes to safety.

Rounding out Idaho’s sketchiest cities, from less-safe No. 28 to more-safe No. 20? Pocatello, Chubbuck, Twin Falls, Blackfoot, Mountain Home, Caldwell, Nampa, Buhl and Jerome.

The Gem State, as a whole, remains a pretty safe place, despite a stampede of newcomers. “The state’s violent and property crime rates fall far below the national average,” SafeWise reports, “and high numbers of residents protect themselves and their property. This could explain why 74% of Idahoans feel safe in their state — compared to 55% nationally.”

Idaho’s largest city, Boise, finished in the middle of the list: No. 16. Boring, but better than bottom of the barrel, right? At No. 11, Meridian just missed the top 10 safest cities.

Not every Idaho city was included in the report. Like, what about gun-loving Second Amendment sanctuary cities like Eagle and Star? “If you don’t see your city on the list,” SafeWise says, “it means that it was below the population threshold or didn’t submit a complete crime report to the FBI ... .”

Ultimately, safety is something we can strive for, but never fully predict.

The Washington County Sheriff’s Office — based in super-safe city Weiser — just reported a fatal shooting Sunday that involved two armed men.

No, it wasn’t in Weiser. It was in relatively nearby Midvale.