Cringey Tweets About Hookups Gone Wrong
Twitter is where many people go to share their moments of triumph, comedic observations and, of course, airline complaints. It’s also the platform where folks tend to reveal their embarrassing moments and utter fails.
Some of the funniest examples involve hookups gone wrong. If you’re looking for a laugh, keep scrolling. We’ve rounded up 28 hilarious and too-real tweets about hookup fails.
i was hooking up with a guy on vacation once and we got into a conversation where i shared something kinda intimate (for a vacation hook up). so i was like, now share something intimate with me. then he opened up to me about how he had a girlfriend and just cheated on her with me
— Cilantro.bb.95@aim.com (@bb_apes) February 24, 2021
Just finished hooking up with a boy and as he was leaving he said “we’ll be in touch” and I just wanna know if I got the job
— carol (@venmo4feet) March 16, 2019
a guy took me back to his place and I noticed he had a Jordan B. Peterson poster in his room 😵💫😵💫 gurl the way I ran at the speed of light
— val💚 (@umh_ok) January 16, 2022
Remembering the time I was hooking up with a guy that "wasn't looking for anything" but I stayed at his place once and his whiteboard had "get a gf" on his to do list
— court (@uspellCoUrTNey) January 31, 2022
One time I slept over this guys house and I felt a roach run up my arm. I screamed and told him about it. He said we should switch sides to sleep on lmaooooooo tell me why I sat up the whole night 💀
— kiwi✨ (@Kikileexo) February 9, 2021
My favorite part of hook up culture is knowing the guy who cried in my bed over his ex girlfriend & held my hand for 4 hours before never speaking to me again still watches my Instagram story every day
— 1984’s George Whorewell (@EwdatsGROSS) January 16, 2019
So the gist of the story is, I slept over at someone's place last night and I ended up sleeping until 2PM
He left to train at 2:08 PM and said he'll be back by 4
BY 2:16 PM HIS LAPTOP CHARGER EXPLODED AND THE ELECTRICITY TURNED OFF IN HIS PLACE— Iris (@irisvicencio) January 26, 2019
straight men have no concept of ambient lighting, i hooked up with a man with overhead lights you could perform surgery under
— Anne Sundell (@anne_sundell) April 2, 2022
Thinking about the time when I was 22 and hooked up with a guy from a bar who broke out his acoustic guitar post coitus and sang Hey There Delilah to me while wearing only his tube socks (2) and feeling the same intense second hand embarrassment as I did in 2006
— McErin☘️ (@colleen_eileen) March 11, 2022
One time I hooked up with a guy on a first date and then followed him on Instagram the next day and that was the part he said was “too much” lol
— Brittany Brave (@BritBrave) July 18, 2021
One time I hooked up with a guy and mid stroke he stopped and asked me to name 5 of his bands songs
— kirbys sucking powers (@_Jaimiferr) September 11, 2021
me hooking up with my ex pic.twitter.com/z7oXYY9QWb
— kristofer thomas (@kristoferthomas) May 25, 2021
i had a roommate tell me one of her friends went on a date and when they went back to her apartment he told her to go into the oven because it was a kink of his lmfao
— em ☭ (@lesoniax) March 17, 2022
One time I went to this dudes house and he asked me if I wanted to see his special box, proceeded to pull out a box of teeth and hair and a piece of mattress from the bed he lost his virginity on
— sk (@venuschasm) March 18, 2022
You ever look at someone u hooked up w and ur like damn ya I went through a little bit of a rough patch there lol
— Erica (@eerrriiicaa) March 21, 2019
you walk into your hookups room and see this...wyd? pic.twitter.com/NBytm56zm2
— phoenix (@urfemmebot) November 23, 2019
Leaving a hookup and knowing you’re about to be in some groupchats for all the wrong reasons is one of the worst feelings 😭
— Soel Jchillinger (@Soeljchillinger) November 24, 2020
I once hooked up with a guy who had no bed frame, no curtains, no furniture, and kept his clothes in a trash bag. He’d been living in this place for years AND he was in his 30’s. Nice guy. But it told me something. (It told me to run)
— Sara Schaefer (@saraschaefer1) January 5, 2020
one time i hooked up w a guy who at 4 AM said “okay so here’s the deal. if you leave now, I’ll call your uber, but if you sleepover, you have to call your own uber” and then i dated him for an entire year.
— Dana Donnelly (@danadonnelly) October 22, 2019
Was laying on the bed and recognized it wasn’t even his house 😶 , which I should’ve recognized from the start since he entered through a window
— patat (@Iannivx) February 10, 2021
She slept over and took all my boxers😭I have not healed
— JOSH KYEYUNE 🇺🇬 (@Josh_k256) July 18, 2022
Hit it off and hooked up with this guy last week and saw he posted a photo today ENGAGED hahahaha LA is wild pic.twitter.com/y0Hny3VMZz
— Ana (@nnahense) June 15, 2020
thinking about the guy who I hooked up with 8 months ago and his girlfriend who just tagged him in her "Happy one year" post on instagram
— jasminericegirl 🍚 (@jasminericegirl) August 24, 2021
me after hooking up with a boy, and then getting ghosted afterwards 😍 pic.twitter.com/8tDwPIqLdm
— emily (@niksdunkin) March 2, 2020
once i was hooking up with a girl at her place and she said she was gonna put on some "mood music" so she turned on paparazzi by lady gaga
— the hype (@TheHyyyype) March 19, 2022
if a guy you hooked up with is mean to you afterwards you are legally allowed to tell people he was into super weird shit and not in a sexy 50 shades way, in like a oh yikes, really? diapers? kinda way
— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) June 25, 2018
Two years ago I had a one night stand that went terribly wrong.
Today we are married.— Howard BK (@Real_Shandis) December 23, 2021
This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.
