Daughter of Tai Dam refugees, former Gov. Robert Ray's grandson share their love story
Jasmine Vong and Jeffrey Newland first met as students in government class at Roosevelt High School. Vong would slip to the classroom's back section, sitting in her natural shy way, and Newland would notice her.
The two grew up in the same circle of friends, attending pre-prom pictures in groups and hanging out on weekends, but their love story came full circle later. The duo's friendship grew as college students at the University of Iowa, where they would tailgate before Saturday football games at Kinnick Stadium. After one of them, Newland told a mutual friend he had developed a crush.
In 2018, they started dating after commencement at Iowa. The couple has been together for five years, but the love shared between them is a result of almost five decades of Iowa history.
"I feel like I took my family's story a little bit for granted. I wasn't really aware until after the fact," Vong said.
She is the daughter of Tai Dam refugees, and Newland is the grandson of the late Gov. Robert Ray, the 38th governor of Iowa, who served from 1969 to 1983. The Tai Dam, an ethnic minority who had settled in Vietnam and Laos, fled to refugee camps in Thailand after South Vietnam and Laos fell to communists in 1975.
The Tai Dam hoped to keep their community and culture intact and asked to be resettled together. The U.S. State Department under President Gerald Ford resisted resettling such a large group in one place, but Ray stepped forward and pressured federal officials to allow the Tai Dam refugees to come as a group to Iowa.
This summer, the couple will marry in a downtown Des Moines ceremony in front of more than 300 people.
More: Iowa is capital of Tai Dam free world
From a circle of friends to a full circle love story
In the mid 2010s, Vong was driving down a Des Moines street with her mom, Pastor Somkong "Kong" Vong.
"In that moment, I had shared, 'I am talking with this guy Jeff. We're just hanging out,' and I think she knew. She asked me, 'Do you know who Jeff's grandfather is?' and I kind of looked confused and I was like, 'No I don't,' and she told me the story of how Gov. Ray brought the Tai Dam people to Des Moines, Iowa," Vong said.
"I knew that my parents had moved here from Laos and then they worked so hard to get to where they were and provide a better life for me and my siblings and then, just from watching them work so hard, it obviously motivated us to work just as hard to get to where we are in life," she continued.
After their respective undergraduate programs in Iowa City were complete, Vong, who is a microbiologist for a probiotic company, moved back home to Des Moines while Newland went on to Florida to study optometry at Nova Southeastern University in Fort Lauderdale, about 30 miles north of Miami.
Halfway through his four-year graduate program, Vong said, "Jeff, you've got to start dating me or I'm gone," according to Newland. They did, and they have been a couple, dating long distance and then in Des Moines, ever since.
“We came back. I’m glad that we made that commitment to each other because it did work out. It was tough certainly,” Newland said. “(We were in) different time zones and that sort of thing, but a couple hurricanes and a pandemic made me come home a little earlier.”
Newland, who works as an optometrist for Associated Ophthalmologists PC in downtown Des Moines, has been back in the city for around two years. Vong works as a biologist for ProbioFerm, a probiotic manufacturing company.
“It just makes it special too just because we’ve known each other for so long, but technically we didn’t really date until 2018,” she added.
'I hope our children are curious about their grandparents'
In July 2018, Governor Ray died at age 89.
"My grandfather was never anything more than just grandpa,” Newland said. “He wasn’t a — in my eyes as a young child — he never was a powerful man.”
In October 2021, Vong's mom, Kong, died after a nearly 10-year battle with ovarian cancer. The two will honor Ray and Kong, a longtime pastor at Lifesong Church of the Open Bible in Des Moines, by starting a family and sharing their story.
"I hope our children are curious about their grandparents and the people before them," Newland said.
More: Iowa History Month: When Southeast Asians came to Iowa
The pair will wed this August at the Greater Des Moines Botanical Garden at 909 Robert Ray Drive in Des Moines.
"My grandfather ... never wanted to be the most important or the loudest in the room, you know? He was always (saying), 'Let's lead by example,'" he said. "And I think we can do that, we can do that. The state of Iowa can do that, too."
On the eve of their wedding ceremony, they plan to host a backyard barbecue celebration with traditional Tai Dam cuisine at Newland's parents' home, where Vong will wear a traditional Tai Dam dress.
"It just felt right to incorporate our culture in some way," Vong said.
Jay Stahl is an entertainment reporter at The Des Moines Register. Follow him on Instagram or reach out at jstahl@gannett.com.
This article originally appeared on Des Moines Register: Iowa Gov. Robert Ray's grandson, Tai Dam descendant to marry in August
