Ditching the shame that comes with stuttering: Advocates see more work to do

Stuttering, characterized by disruptions in speech flow, affects over 80 million people worldwide, but few seek help, according to the Stuttering Foundation.

Advocates and practitioners say that’s because understanding and acceptance of stuttering is still lagging far behind other minority groups who have gained a seat at the table in conversations of inclusion, and that is causing a lot of pain.

That was the motivation behind San Franciscan Maya Chupkov’s podcast, "Proud Stutter."

Launched on International Stuttering Awareness Day in 2021 with 41,798 downloads, the podcast is still in its infancy. But people from over 48 countries are tuning in to hear interviews with stutterers considering topics such as how stuttering affects families and the evolution of speech therapy.

This year, International Stuttering Awareness Day is in the fall, scheduled for Sunday, Oct. 22.

Chupkov, 30, spent most of her life “hiding and masking” her stutter. The community calls it “covert stuttering” when a stutterer navigates through conversations constantly swapping trigger words for others, inserting pauses and restarting sentences to “pass as fluent.”

Why hide it?

“Growing up, I was deeply affected by the portrayal of stuttering in movies and TV shows — for example, the character in 'Billy Madison' who stutters and is mocked,” said Chupkov, who saw the Adam Sandler movie as a young child. “It made me want to hide my stutter.”

Chupkov, with encouragement from her husband, decided to tackle the stereotypes head-on with a podcast built around conversations with fellow stutterers.

“The more authentic stories we tell, the more we can shift the narrative and move away from harmful stereotypes,” Chupkov said, adding that the number of stuttering jokes found in recent shows and movies is “disheartening.”

Society at large doesn’t understand the damage that assumptions about low intelligence, nervousness, shyness, lack of confidence, incompetence and flawed speech can do, advocates say.

Carneys Point resident Lucy Reed, 68, is one such advocate. The speech pathologist has dedicated her life to helping fellow stutterers.

“Stuttering can cause fear, anxiety and a constant need to monitor speech. It affects academic and professional opportunities and limits authentic self-expression,” said Reed, whose stutter caused “profound shame” that consumed her for 43 years.

Reed, who practices out of her Salem County home and is licensed in tele-therapy in eight states, said the breakthrough moment in her life came when she realized she wanted to “live authentically” and embrace the fact that she stutters.

“People who stutter live in constant fear and anxiety, avoiding situations where they might have to speak. They monitor every aspect of their lives, and it's a horrible way to live,” Reed said. “My goal is to help them overcome fear and shame associated with stuttering.”

Fear builds when someone is trying to hide that they stutter, and trying not to stutter only makes stuttering worse, she said.

“They should embrace their stuttering, allow themselves to stutter. And when that happens, the struggle and the tension, the fear, the shame, the anxiety reduce and the person communicates joyfully without fear and their natural fluency emerges,” Reed said.

She hopes to see New Jersey advocates do more to celebrate stutterers and their challenges — including an embrace of the October awareness day.

Help is out there

A number of resources are available, including from the Memphis, Tennessee-based Stuttering Foundation, which offers training videos for therapists and coping techniques for individuals. It has also donated its books to 16,000 public libraries around the country. The organization is a labor of love started in 1947 by Malcolm Fraser.

His daughter and fellow stutterer, Jane Fraser, runs the operation today. Fraser offers a tip that can be observed in action during "Star Wars" movies starring a famous stutterer, James Earl Jones.

Deliberate pauses when speaking can help significantly, Fraser said.

“James Earl Jones is an excellent example,” she said. “These pauses enhance the impact of the speaker's message. It's remarkable how strategic pauses can make a difference in public speaking.”

Other famous stutterers include Golden Globe Award-winner Emily Blunt, "Pulp Fiction" star Samuel L. Jackson and President Joe Biden.

This article originally appeared on NorthJersey.com: Stutterers left out of conversations of inclusion