Elise commentary: A conversation about joy and humanity

“Stop Apartheid.” “Free Tibet.” These are four words those of us who are of a certain age heard over and over in our youth and adulthood. The latter imperative is still an issue today.

What we (or at least I) never considered were the two men, one Christian, one Tibetan Buddhist, who sacrificed their lives to mend the brokenness in their respective countries and to guide us to compassion and joy.

Both Archbishop Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Llama have been in our consciousness for decades. Despite coming from extremely different backgrounds (Tutu grew up in squalor and poverty; the Dalai Lama lived a life of privilege), the men – friends for decades – have more in common than some people might expect.

Both have an understanding of suffering. Archbishop Tutu (his friends call him “Arch”) believes that, in order to have compassion towards others, we much first experience suffering. The South African Anglican bishop notes that God’s plan for us to suffer can be viewed as an opportunity to help those in need.

The 14th Dalai Lama, known as His Holiness, is the spiritual head of the newest school of Tibetan Buddhism. He views suffering as the natural order of life.

However, he also believes that by practicing Buddha’s teachings, we can protect ourselves from more suffering. Quality of life depends not upon external development or material progress, but upon the inner development of peace and happiness.

If we first establish peace within our minds by training in spiritual paths, outer peace will come naturally. If we do not, world peace will never be achieved. Without inner peace, outer peace is impossible.

A documentary regarding the friendship between the two leaders was brought to my attention by a very nice woman at St. Andrew’s Episcopal church in Amarillo, Texas on Palm Sunday. She recommended the 90-minute film on Amazon Prime called, “Mission: Finding Joy, Happiness in Troubled Times,” directed by Louie Psyihoyos and released in 2022.

The conversations took three years to film and are based on Finding Joy, a book of interviews and recollections of the times Arch and His Holiness spent together for several hours at the Dali Lama’s residence in Dharamsala, India.

The documentary includes Douglas Abrams, co-author of the book, and at least six others, including Arch’s daughter (a priest in her own right) and His Holiness’ translator, Thupten Jinpa Langri.

In the film, we hear from several scientists as well. Some claim that “joy” can, in fact, have a profound effect on the physical body. One scientist ran brain scans on individuals who meditated and were relaxed in mind, and compared them to those who were less introspective and more focused on the outside world.

The result was that the individuals who had reached a level of consciousness existing separate from the body had more healthy immune systems and fewer physical ailments.

As far as I know, this is only anecdotal evidence, and I am certainly not one to understand the science behind their conclusions.

From what I understand, there is a difference in happiness and joy. We can all have happy moments in our lives. But joy is different. It is deeper and has a sense of rising or expanding. It is extreme elation.

Through that kind of joy, we can unlock a sense of purpose and hope which ultimately releases us from emotional poverty. For God's children, the power of joy is never-ending. Joy enables us to experience others the way that God does.

There is a scene in the film I remember vividly because it disarmed me at first.

The two men were seated on the ground in India while school children approached them one by one. A girl, perhaps a young teen, told Bishop Tutu and His Holiness about great struggles and sorrows in her family. Among other wounds, she had to leave her parents behind in Tibet, an unimaginable trauma.

The girl started crying as she relayed these facts to the two men. The Dalai Lama’s response initially angered me. He told the girl she must have courage and that she needed to build the strength inside her body and mind in order to move forward.

Bishop Tutu, however, expressed his deep sympathy and condolences about what happened to the girl. He may have even said, “I’m so sorry.”

From my codified way of thinking, and as someone who has a degree in Counseling, I immediately accepted – even rejoiced – in the Bishop’s response.

It was only later, when I had time to contemplate the scene, that I came to understand His Holiness’ remarks. Indeed, for the girl to have a peaceful, joyful mind, she would ultimately have to summon courage and build upon the strength already within her.

Two different responses and, in the end, neither better or worse than the other.

Later in the film, Archbishop Tutu uses the term “ubutu.” This is a word meaning "humanity" and is sometimes translated as "I am because we are" (also "I am because you are").

I am reminded of Martin Buber’s concept of an I-Thou relationship. It is so simple; yet, we often don’t often recognize it as it happens.

For example, say you take a cab from La Guardia Airport in New York to your hotel. Perhaps the cab driver is someone to whom you are drawn because he or she reminds you of a person in your life, or the driver is very warm and friendly.

In such a case, there can pass between the two of you a moment when your hearts, prisms of light, coalesce into a stunning new image, and you are aware – even for the briefest moment – of your shared humanity. There is no separation because of gender, religion, class, ethnicity, employment. You are one in that moment.

A similar example can occur while you run an errand like the grocery store. You may ask a produce manager about the difference in the kind of nectarines or pears. Again, a quotidian moment in your day, but one that, given openness of heart and care, can become an extraordinary nanosecond of souls united in their shared experience of God.

Archbishop Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama – both spiritual leaders and Nobel Peace Prize winners – differ in approach to their God, but they both see charity, hope, courage, compassion and shared humanity as the main reason to be in this world.

Desmond Tutu died on December 26, 2021 at 90 years old and was buried on January 1, 2022. How fitting that a man of God died the day after Christmas, when he and we celebrate the birth of Christ.

His Holiness must miss his friend greatly, but he also believes that he will see him again, if not in Christians’ view of Heaven, then along the path to becoming a more perfect version of whom we were meant to be.

This article originally appeared on Amarillo Globe-News: Elise commentary: A conversation about joy and humanity