Emily Ratajkowski has opened up about the courage it took to end her relationship with ex-husband Sebastian Bear-McClard.
The 31-year-old spoke candidly about getting a divorce from Bear-McClard, who she shares two-year-old son, Sylvester, with, during Thursday’s episode of the Going Mental with Eileen Kelly podcast. During the conversation, Ratajkowski recalled how unhappy she was before walking away from her marriage of four years.
“I didn’t have the courage to leave for a long time. I was really, really unhappy,” she said. “I was, like, 100 pounds and I had just had a baby. I got really skinny ‘cause I was not OK.”
She revealed that she “tried to take antidepressants” at the time, while explaining that she did “everything” she could to try to make herself happy.
The model also recalled how she’d questioned herself throughout her marriage and shared her opinion on gaslighting, which is when someone manipulates you into questioning what you think or feel.
“I was sure there was something wrong with me. I think so much of what I learned coming out of that relationship is to trust your instincts,” she said. “Gaslighting is a real thing.”
During Thursday’s episode of Going Mental, host Eileen Kelly also asked the model about cheating speculation and if it led to the end of her relationship. While she opted not to address these rumours, Ratajkowski did discuss how many of her fans were surprised by the allegation that Bear-McClard had cheated on her.
“It was so interesting that that was the reaction to that news, because I was just like: ‘Duh, men are trash, ladies,’” she said “Like, it doesn’t matter who you are, or how perfect you are, whatever.”
Ratajkowski then revealed how her life changed after the breakup, as it allowed her to get to know herself better.
“I didn’t understand that it was actually going to be so nice to come back to myself,” she said. “And like to return back to how I see the world, how I understand things, my instincts, whatever…You’ll be shocked by how much better life is.”
However, she also acknowledged how hard it was for her to “walk away,” as she noted she still wanted to “have that family,” which included her ex-husband and their child.
The Gone Girl star officially filed for divorce from the director in September 2022, four years after the pair first tied the knot.
During the interview, she said that she was choosing not to share additional details because of ongoing legal proceedings and for “privacy” reasons.
“We’re not officially divorced, so, it’s just even, you know, for privacy and for legal reasons, and all of that,” she explained.
In February, Ratajkowski also made headlines when comedian Eric André posted NSFW photos with her on Valentine’s Day, which seemingly confirmed their relationship. However, days after the post was shared, she shared a cryptic message on TikTok about her relationship status and hinted at the end of a “situationship”.
Throughout the last few months, Ratajkowski has also opened up about returning to the dating scene and the recent media scrutiny around her love life. During a January episode of her podcast, High Low with Emrata, she expressed how the paparazzi has made dating “kind of difficult” for her.
“I’ve been trying to casually date and not get cuffed up, and it’s been hard to do that and keep mindful of the people that I’m seeing,” she said. “Any time I go on another date, everybody knows.”
She also specified how these paparazzi photos of her dates have affected the potential of some of her relationships.
“It’s screwed up a couple of these situations,” she added. “Because it got out there too fast and then the pressure of it all just became so heightened, and it’s like I don’t even know if I like this person.”