An Encouraging Word: What is love?
A teacher asked her elementary school students to answer the following question: “What is love?” Here were some of their responses.
“Love is that first feeling you feel before all the bad stuff gets in the way.”
“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth.”
“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.”
“Love is when mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure that taste is OK.”
“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you don’t like to play with.”
“Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.”
“Love is when mommy gives daddy the best piece of chicken.”
“Love is when mommy sees daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Brad Pitt.”
“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.”
“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.”
Cute? Yes. But also thought provoking. Love is one of the most overused words in the English language. There are at least 13 definitions for love in the dictionary. And when you look up the word “love” in a thesaurus, more than 170 different words and phrases describe it.
So does love mean “you never have to say you’re sorry?” Is love only given when someone has earned it? Is love shown by letting a person go down the wrong road and offering no correction? Is love something we fall into or fall out of?
So how do we cut through the myriad of attached meanings we have given to one simple word? How do we return to the most important and fundamental definitions of love? We can go back to the source — to the one who created love in the first place: God.
Within the Bible we find there are four different words used for love. The first is Philia (FILL-EE-UH) — Brotherly Love. Philadelphia gets its name from it (the city of Brotherly Love). It is the love that guides how we should interact with each other. It is the love Jesus described in John 13:35.
Second, there is Eros (AIR-ohs) — Romantic Love. The Bible takes this Greek word and applies to the relationship between a husband and wife. Eros love is to be reserved and shared within the commitment marriage. This is the type of love Paul wrote about in 1 Corinthians 7.
Next comes Storge (STORE-jay) — family love. This is a natural love that forms between parents and their children. It pulls in siblings and expands to cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents. This kind of steady and sure love is easily learned and lasts a lifetime. Paul expanded Storge love to the church family in Romans 12.
Ultimately, there is Agape (uh-GAH-pay) love: the type of selfless love that comes from God and is practiced in the lives of those who follow Him. It is perfectly described by Paul in 1 Corinthians 13. When the Bible says that “God is love” 1 John 4:8, it is referring to Agape.
“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.” Properly understanding and applying these four types of love will make a difference. Let’s start today!
Tom Cash is the senior minister at First Church of Christ in Sault Ste. Marie, Michigan. He also serves as Chaplain for Hospice of the Eastern Upper Peninsula. On Facebook he is known as Yooper Pastor and Yooper Pasty.
This article originally appeared on The Sault News: An Encouraging Word: What is love?
