Fans Are Getting Two Distinctly Different Experiences at Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour. Not All of Them Are Happy About It.

The Eras Tour concert film was supposed to end the divide between the Taylor Swift haves and have nots once and for all: Finally, everyone was going to be able to see a version of the tour that so many couldn’t thanks to unprecedented demand, absurdly high prices, and a Ticketmaster meltdown. In many ways, it worked: Hordes of Swifties flocked to theaters upon the release of Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour last week, resulting in a $92.8 million opening weekend box office, the highest ever for a concert film.

But in the days since the movie came out, a new divide has emerged among Eras veterans. For some of them, the grass still looks greener on the other side of the fence—or rather, the Eras screening one theater over from theirs looked way more fun than the one they were at.

“You guys really overhyped the movie experience, everybody stayed silent, no bracelet trades and everyone except me and my friend looked so serious,” wrote one fan on TikTok, in a post that received more than 67,000 likes. Comments on the video echoed the complaint: “no honestly i slaved over bracelets and glasses and everyone was antisocial and sitting it made me sad,” one person wrote.

Some of this hype came from Swift herself—when she announced the concert film in August, her social media statement included the line, “Eras attire, friendship bracelets, singing and dancing encouraged.” At real tour dates, fans have taken to dressing up and exchanging hand-beaded friendship bracelets, as well as vigorously singing and dancing along to the music, so Swift was setting the tone for the movie’s rollout, telling fans that they should feel free to pretend they were attending the genuine article.

Lots of fans did just this, and social media is also full of videos featuring Eras Tour screenings that might be described as pretty lit, complete with loud singing and people standing up to dance. In some, fans formed circles at the front of the theater, holding hands ecstatically, which was cute when most of the participants were little girls, and a little cultish otherwise. But not everyone was happy about these situations: Some of the videos depicting fans having semi-religious experiences at the movie were accompanied by posts like this one, where a user complained, “I’m at the worst screening ever cant even hear taylor :)” And indeed, other comments on that TikTok bemoaning the overhyped movie experience spoke up to say that they would prefer it that way: “unpopular opinion: i actually want my session to go like this. i don’t have tickets for the concert so I want to be able to see it and enjoy it,” one reads.

In response to all this, the Hollywood Reporter published an article about how the movie sparked a debate over theater etiquette among fans. While some fans did give off the distinct impression that they had never been to a movie theater, or possibly in public at all, that seems like only half the story: In emphasizing all the fans who were looking for a quiet, nonparticipatory experience, the article didn’t acknowledge the other fans on the opposite end of the spectrum, who were hoping for arena-style rowdiness. Appropriately for a singer that many fans refer to as “Blondie,” it was a bit of a Goldilocks situation. Whether they wanted a respectful watch and ended up at a rager or vice versa, many fans found themselves having the opposite theater experience to what they were hoping for.

Similar poles can be found in the discussion elsewhere. On Reddit, in the same thread where one user complained about being “seated next to a group of about 20 shrieking preteen girls,” another regretted their position near teenagers who seemed to be recording themselves the whole time—but still others wrote about the vibe inside their showings being “too chill” or “disappointing.”

A writer for the A.V. Club shared of her moviegoing experience, “[S]eeing all those weeping fans onscreen in a silent, mostly empty theater with not even an AMC-branded friendship bracelet in sight rang especially hollow.” But she went through the grass-is-greener phenomenon in real time, going on to write, “While no one was in costume in my theater, I did take a pee break halfway through, which revealed an entirely different crowd from an earlier screening that had just let out.” The other audience had “more pink, more rhinestones, more souvenir popcorn buckets, and at least two limited edition folklore cardigans, so the vibe might have been totally different.”

Of course, none of this means that plenty of fans weren’t able to find a happy medium of singing in their chairs, but it does speak to some of the difficulties of scaling the concert experience—Beyoncé, take note.

Feeling FOMO is obviously a huge part of the human condition, but could Taylor and her team have done anything to combat this? Some suggested separate tiers of screenings, so fans could opt into a rowdier or chiller experience, depending on what they wanted. The movie is actually only playing in theaters on Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays, according to Variety, with the rationale that it makes it more likely that theatergoers will get to watch it with a packed crowd. I would expect the evening-hour screenings to be the most raucous of those, so if you’re looking for a quieter experience, going in the daytime might be the way to do it.

Though I don’t have any recommendations for sidestepping the fun police, who seem to be legion, if your concern is that your screening isn’t serving up the energy you’d hoped for, there’s a remedy for that: Bring your own fun; be the change you wish to see in the world. Especially in theaters with reclining seats, the impulse to stay seated and quietly bob your head along will be strong. It’s natural; it’s baked into human psychology not to go against the grain. I felt a little sheepish standing up to dance in the screening I went to over the weekend, but I did it, and I’m glad I did. As Swifties know, part of living in the moment—“So make the friendship bracelets / Take the moment and taste it”—means accepting that you’re on your own, kid.