Forget the hate mail: Wilmington LGBTQ center provides strength to local youth

For the executive director of the LGBTQ Center of the Cape Fear Coast, current attacks on gay and transgender youth are more than just speeches given at recent school board meetings: they are a danger to the health and safety of young people across the region.

“I want every LGBTQ youth to know that their identity, their personality, who they are and who they love is 100% valid, and that they have people who know that to be true, who are willing to stand with and beside and in front of them where it's necessary,” Caroline Morin said.

Morin stepped into her role as executive director of the center around a year ago, amid a transformation from what was called the Frank Harr Foundation to a more recognizable name to continue growing its advocacy work.

Morin also took the job amid yet another political attack on the community she committed to serve.

Nationally, recent months have seen Republican lawmakers ratchet up their anti-LGBT rhetoric. Twenty state legislatures have considered so-called “Don’t Say Gay” bills, which could rid school curriculums of any mention of the LGBT community and its history. Florida signed one into law in March.

In New Hanover County, parents have taken to public forums like school board meetings to demand the removal of books referencing the LGBT community and accuse the school district of “grooming” children through a “gender support plan,” which isn’t currently in use by the district.

But for many LGBT youth in Wilmington and across 11 surrounding counties, the LGBTQ Center of the Cape Fear Coast has acted as a safe haven, where they can connect and socialize with peers and allies.

'Our humanity is valid'

The organization hosts a bi-monthly Wilmington Pride Youth Group, a confidential gathering for seventh through 12th graders to meet in a safe environment facilitated by the center. The location of the meeting is never publicly shared and a key aspect of the group is to maintain privacy for youth in need. Those who attend the group play games, work on art projects, develop social and life skills and talk with one another about whatever they want.

“I think we've all been seeing the way the LGBTQ identity has been politicized and weaponized for people's agendas,” Morin said. “The thing that I continue to try to remind our youth and adults … we're really not asking people whether or not our humanity is valid. We're not asking people whether our rights are valid. We are telling people that our humanity is valid.”

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LGBT youth are statistically far more likely to be attempt or commit suicide, along with experience depression and other physical and mental health issues than their straight peers. That’s why having a community like the youth group is so important, Morin said, especially for those who are experiencing harassment or discrimination because of their sexuality or gender identity.

There’s strength in numbers, Morin said, which is why the center itself rarely experiences harassment from the community.

“We're sending a message that like, really, regardless, you can send me hate mail, you can do whatever you want to do, but like I'm going to show up every day and unlock the door,” she said. “We're still going to show up to do this work.”

The center also offers resources to adults in the LGBT community and their allies, and Morin said their goal is to support people seeking their resources “cradle to grave.” The center offers other programs for youth like the Youth Steering Committee to help connect students with volunteer opportunities and Safe Space Training on how to help LGBT youth feel included in whatever space they’re in, among others.

The center holds a variety of other informational sessions, support groups and social events, and it has a drop-in center at Princess Street.

Working to educate

Morin said one of the most important aspects of the center is education. It offers educational programs like the Safe Space training to help schools, businesses, churches and other organizations learn about stigmas and misinformation around the community and push for more justice for the LGBT community.

Right now, Morin is the only full-time staffer at the center, and she does what she can with the resources available. Eventually, she said she hopes the center will have the funding to expand operations to a full five days a week with more full-time staffers so it can continue educating and promoting inclusivity and pride in the LGBT community.

“I always encourage people to like think about the last time you went somewhere where you felt deeply unwelcome. Hold that feeling and then think about how you might feel if you felt deeply unwelcome in that way every day of your life,” she said. “This is America. I thought we all agreed that everybody was supposed to be happy, healthy and free. And those things are not being upheld when we exclude LGBTQ people.”

Youth can contact the center to participate in the Pride Youth Group by emailing wpyg@lgbtqcapefear.org. The center takes donations and is hosting several events and fundraisers throughout June to celebrate Pride Month.

Reporter Sydney Hoover can be reached at 910-343-2339 or shoover@gannett.com.

This article originally appeared on Wilmington StarNews: LGBTQ center hopes to grow, support Wilmington-area youth