If the sound of a deep, melodious voice describing food in a commercial makes your stomach growl, wait until you hear Stefan Johnson's soothing words about french fries.
In early June, the professional voice actor took to TikTok to use his pipes for something else besides commercials, promos and animations — instead, he decided to talk about his favorite (and least favorite) fast-food fries.
On Johnson's website, his voice is described as being "masculine, ominous, warm, rich, deep, sexy and smooth." And when he discusses hot, savory, carb-filled french fries — it's easy to feel all those things.
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Since Johnson, who is based in Ohio, posted the video on TikTok, it's received nearly 250,000 likes and thousands of adoring comments.
To kick off the review, Johnson addressed Rally's and Checker's fries which, in Johnson's opinion, are not up to par.
"People consider this one to be the pinnacle of the fast food fry. It's fluffy on the inside, it's crispy on the outside, very well seasoned. I can get down with it. But there are better out there," Johnson said.
Next, he addressed the temperature troubles inherent in an order of McDonald's fries.
"My problem with these are unless you're eating them at 5,000 degrees, they're worthless. The second they get remotely cold, they're inedible," Johnson admitted.
Calling McDonald's fries "inedible" might make Johnson's ranking more controversial than the best and worst fries in America list that caused a frenzy in 2019.
— L.A. Times Food (@latimesfood) February 12, 2019
Moving on to Wendy's, Johnson explained that an integral part of the perfect fry comes down to a delicate balance of how it's salted. Despite his respect for other Wendy's fare, like the Baconator burger, Johnson is not a fan of the chain's inconsistent salt-to-fry ratio.
"I absolutely love Wendy's with all of my black little heart, but Wendy's fries, they're always hit or miss. Either they over salt them, or there's not a single grain of salt on them and I can't get jiggy with that," he said.
While Johnson did not address the divisive waffle fries at Chick-fil-A or In-N-Out's notoriously dry spuds, he did give a shoutout to Arby's — not to the chain's sandwiches (which he labeled as "trash"), but to its curly fries.
Finally, to top off his rating, Johnson ended by talking about another well-known chain, which has been commended for its fried chicken sandwiches on many occasions.
"Everything at Popeye's bangs — including these," Johnson shouts to the camera to really hammer home his love for chicken chain.
So, what's this voice-over artist-turned-french fry connoisseur's final french fry rating?
Popeye's: 10 out of 10
Arby's: 9 out of 10
Rally's and Checkers: 7 out of 10
Wendy's: 4.5 out of 10
McDonald's: 4 out of 5