Funny Tweets About Kids' Halloween Costumes, From Exhausted Parents
Halloween season brings many fun traditions for families, like carving pumpkins, putting up spooky decorations and eating too much candy. Then, of course, there is the all-important costume selection process.
From issuing strange requests to constantly changing their minds, kids don’t make the Halloween costume situation easy for parents. But at least they can turn to Twitter to find humor in the frustration and vent a little.
Below, we’ve rounded up 27 funny tweets from parents about kids’ Halloween costumes.
My nine year old has requested the following Halloween costume: cute baby wolf, but spooky, NOT SCARY.
I...don't think Target sells this.— Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) October 18, 2019
True love is standing in the Halloween store the night before Halloween with a smile on your face as your 5yo picks out a "cooler" costume.
— Jennifer Lizza (@outsmartedmommy) October 30, 2013
I waited a long time to have this damned baby so he has three Halloween costumes and they’re all elaborate and insane.
— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) October 31, 2020
Me: Halloween will be cold. You'll need layers.
7-year-old: Like two costumes?
Me: Like a sweatshirt.
7: I'm a double witch.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 30, 2019
Our family rule is that if the kid's costume costs more than $50, they have to wear it to school at least four times after Halloween.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) October 22, 2015
One minute you’re running around the city from club to club, being young and wild and free.
Then you blink and you’re a parent driving around to a million stores to make a Unicorn Ostrich Halloween costume.
Life’s a trip, man.— Amanda Marcotte | Mediocre Mommy (@storiesofamom) October 12, 2019
The scariest thing a parent can face on Halloween is getting their preschooler out of their costume and to a potty in time.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) October 25, 2015
My daughter wants to be really scary this Halloween so instead of a costume she is going to carry a school fundraising packet to every door.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 27, 2018
Ah, October: when you order your kid’s Halloween costume early so they don’t sell out, then spend the rest of the month keeping them from wearing and ruining it before the 31st.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) October 14, 2018
Me: What do you want to be for Halloween?
6-year-old: Pikachu.
Me: We could do that.
6: With a costume that really zaps people.
Hard no on the Taser.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 11, 2020
Neighbor: Your kids’ costumes are so cute! And what’re you supposed to be?
Me: *bundled in a blanket, gripping a hot toddy in a sippy cup* AT HOME IN BED WATCHING GORDON RAMSAY RERUNS— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) October 31, 2019
Slowly learning to wait til last possible minute to get my kids' Halloween costumes to account for the 763 times they change their minds.
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) October 14, 2013
Son: dad can you help me with my Halloween costume?
Me: sure, what are you going as?
Son: a refrigerator
Me: that’s not scary
Son: the door’s been left open overnight
Me, shuddering quietly: holy shit— The Dad (@thedad) October 31, 2018
My favorite October 30th tradition is my kids trying to change their mind on their Halloween costume.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 30, 2016
My thoughts are with any parent whose child has "confidently" picked out and purchased their Halloween costume already.
— Scary Mommy (@ScaryMommy) September 4, 2019
The most frightening Halloween costume is those cheap plastic vampire teeth for kids. The mere sight of those drool-filled disease traps lying around the house gives me chills.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) October 7, 2022
6YO didn’t share candy so I told her that 4YOs costume was much better than hers, but only after reassuring her that our favorite child was also 4YO
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) November 1, 2019
Some people go to Vegas to gamble. I order my kid a costume from China hoping it will arrive before Halloween.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) October 18, 2022
Shoutout to parents who were trying to plan ahead but are already returning a Halloween costume.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 13, 2021
5-year-old: How many Halloween costumes can I get?
Me: One.
5: We need more Halloweens.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) October 11, 2019
Most years: Get Halloween costume at the last minute and it doesn’t fit properly
This year: Got it super early, kid changed mind at last minute and costume doesn’t fit properly— Mom On The Rocks (@mom_ontherocks) October 26, 2019
Kid: *wearing last year’s Halloween costume*
Me: You really like that costume.
K: I love it.
Me: Is it your favorite?
K: It is!
Me: And it still fits you.
K: I fits perfectly.
Me: You should wear it for Halloween.
K: No.— Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 15, 2019
No greater bastion of parenting desperation than the Halloween costume aisle on October 31.
— Will Gray (@WillGrayGC) October 31, 2019
[Halloween shopping for kids]
Wife: So how about a monkey costume for our youngest?
Me: I don't know. I think he's more...
[Youngest flings poop on to my face]
Me: ...it's perfect.— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) September 23, 2019
My 7 year old just told me that she wants us to do a theme costume this year for Halloween. She wants me to dress up as Abraham Lincoln and she's going to go as John Wilkes Booth.
Click "follow" for more parenting tips.— KnowComment (@KnownComment) September 20, 2021
My son needed a last-minute Halloween costume so I wrapped him like a mummy with my CVS receipt.
You can also scan him for $2 off Advil.— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) October 30, 2021
Daddy....?
No, you cannot change your mind on your costume. Halloween is tomorrow, too late.
I just wanted a snack.
Oh, ok.— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 30, 2018
This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.