How to Graciously Thank Someone for a Gift — No Matter What It Is
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While giving a gift is one thing, sincerely saying "thank you" for one that you've received may be just as important. Whether the gift is something you've asked for, dropped hints about, or not seen coming at all, you want to make sure that the gift-giver feels appreciated for their efforts.
How to thank someone for a gift in the right way depends mainly on what the gift is and how you've received it. There may also be the intent behind the gift that's important to acknowledge, especially if they're gifting outside of the usual occasions like Christmas or a wedding anniversary.
While an offhand "thanks" is better than nothing at all, it costs you next to nothing to be as generous as possible with your words of appreciation.
The Power of a "Thank You" Note
No matter what the gift is, one of the best ways to express your gratitude for it is by sending a thank-you note.
"A handwritten thank-you note is still the gold standard when receiving gifts. This holds true even if you said 'thank you' when they handed you the gift," says Jodi Smith of Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting. While sending thank-you notes is expected when receiving gifts for weddings, showers, and funerals, there's no need to limit it to these bigger life events.
"Cards are little gifts in the mail," says Tami Claytor, etiquette coach at Always Appropriate. Sending a card is a small way to reciprocate the joy and surprise that you felt upon receiving their gift. And as far as the note's content goes, you can keep it short and sweet. Claytor says, "It should include appreciation for the thoughtfulness of the gesture and how the gift will be used."
Where to shop thank-you cards: Crane Stationery, Etsy, Hammerpress, Minted, Paper Source, Papier, Papyrus, Target
When Is a Thank-You Text OK?
If the gift in question doesn't seem like one that warrants a handwritten card, sending a text is the next best thing. For example, someone treating you to dinner is an occasion that Claytor says is appropriate for a thank-you text. "Of course, you say 'thank you' in the moment, but you can follow up via text letting the person know how much the meal was enjoyed," she says.
Also, if you've received a gift through the mail, like a subscription box, it's a good idea to let the sender know that it hasn't been lost in shipping purgatory. "A quick 'thank you, it arrived!' via text or email is a thoughtful gesture before writing the handwritten note," says Smith.
Make It the Gift That Keeps Giving
Some gifts, especially the ones that feel the most personal, deserve even more acknowledgment. "The best way to thank any gift-giver is by purposefully showing them the value that their gift has provided you," says Patrick Kucharson, who writes the Better Gift Coach newsletter.
Over time, if the well-chosen gift has become one of the most useful or delightful things that you own, it'll probably make the sender's day to let them know that."My favorite way to do this is by starting a tradition of remembering to text them from time to time with photos of me enjoying the gift," says Kucharson.
Don't Try to One-Up Them
After you've received a truly awesome gift from someone, you might feel that you have to reciprocate in the future by buying them a present that's equally as excellent (or expensive).
Fortunately, the etiquette experts say otherwise."Gift-giving should not be a competition," says Kucharson. "Expect that someone giving you a gift is aligned with the true north star of gift-giving: selfless investment in relationships."
Because everyone's financial situation is different, a small splurge for one person could be a lot of money for someone else — so don't worry about having to match the monetary value when it's your turn to give.
"An appreciative recipient wouldn’t enjoy a gift that caused undo hardship on the well-wisher," says Claytor.
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