Growing up without my dad: Velton Locklear IV
I grew up being told I was the “man of the house.” Despite the fact that I was only six-years-old, I had to be strong for my family. I was forced to face this reality after my dad was killed in action in Iraq on September 23, 2006.
At that time, my family and I were living in Hawaii. We moved around every few years to new locations where my father was stationed. I learned to meet new friends and enjoyed seeing different parts of the country. It wasn’t always easy, but I believe I have grown to be the smart and intelligent young man my father would have loved to see grow up.
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My father was Sgt. Velton Locklear, III, a U.S. Army infantryman who was born at Fort Bliss and followed in his father’s footsteps. After he enlisted, he deployed twice. On his second tour of duty in Iraq, he was killed when his vehicle encountered a roadside bomb. He received a Purple Heart and a Bronze Star among his many other decorations. My father was a brave man, and I am proud of him.
But when he passed, things became very hard for our family and me. His sacrifice was hard to accept, but as I have grown, I have learned that he risked his life so my family and I could have a better future.
It wasn't easy growing up without a father. I was sad when I saw other kids have their fathers go to our football games, or when I saw kids play catch with their dads at the park. It was especially difficult to watch videos of soldiers returning home to their kids. To this day, I still feel a small amount of pain when I see a person in uniform.
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Growing up, I had to teach myself to be a man. As hard as it was, I am thankful for my mother and her dedication to raising me and my brother as best she could. My mom is the strongest person I know, and she is the reason I am the man I am today. Even after losing her husband, the father of her two young boys, she still managed to graduate college and raise me and my brother to be mature, smart, and capable of getting accepted into good universities.
Although my father is not with us today, his spirit still lives with my family and me, and will forever. I’m dedicating my college years to him, and when I graduate, it will be in honor of his sacrifice to this country. I wish my father could be here to see how far I have come. Since I was so young when he died, I don't remember much about him. However, after hearing stories from my family, I smile when I realize I share personality traits or when I look at photos of him and see similar features. The more I look, the more I understand why a member of my family says, “You look just like your daddy.”
Because I lost my dad at such a young age, I didn’t have the same emotional reactions as my family did. When visiting his grave, they tell my brother and me, “It’s okay to cry.” But at six years old, all I could do was stare at his grave and stay quiet and shy.
As the years have passed and I’ve matured, my childhood is harder to think about. Very few understand the courage it takes to put your life on the line for something you care about. I’ve dedicated my future to my father’s sacrifice to this country and, one day, I hope to be a good father with kids of my own. When they ask me what my dad was like, I will tell them, “He was a hero.”
Velton Locklear, IV is a student at the University of Hawaii at Manoa and a recipient of the Freedom Alliance scholarship which is awarded to children of military heroes.
This article originally appeared on El Paso Times: Memorial Day tribute to Velton Locklear, III
