What happens when you run out of vitamin supplements? Probably not much ∣ Ervolino

Last Saturday, I finally bit the bullet and ordered something called Q-Defend on Amazon.

For the last six years, I had been getting a vitamin formula called ZBEC — 360 capsules of zinc, with vitamins B, E and C — delivered to my house every three months.

I took four capsules every day and my body seemed to like them. I rarely got sick and all of my internal organs seemed happy.

My glands, too.

Then, one day, I went out to the mailbox and…

Poof!

No vitamins.

I went onto the Amazon website, did some clicking and saw the dreaded words OUT OF STOCK.

This was during my big, fat COVID pandemic.

Lots of things were out of stock.

I did my best to cover my sadness, even though all of my neighbors had already seen me sitting next to the mailbox weeping and wailing.

One even came over to see what was wrong.

“You poor thing,” he said. “Are you OK? Did someone die?”

I wiped away my tears, nodded and said yes.

(I was embarrassed. What else could I say?)

“My grandmother,” I lied.

“Your grandmother? You’re kidding! How old was she?”

I quickly did the math in my head and realized that my father’s mother, who died in 1978, would have been 139. So, I just said, “I can’t talk about it right now.”

I then went back into the house and stared out the window.

Maybe they’ll be back in stock tomorrow! Or, the next day!

Alas, that didn’t happen.

I spent the following week wandering around the house and going through the 17 stages of grief.

Psychologists will tell you there are only five stages, but I added a few: cursing the moon, kicking the dining room table, screaming at the dog, etc.

I had also managed to convince myself that without those capsules, I wouldn’t be able to function.

I guess I got a little too dramatic about it. After two days in bed, with a cold compress draped across my forehead, one friend became annoyed.

He stood over my sick bed and yelled, “Now what? Are you going through zinc withdrawal?”

“That must be it,” I said, weakly. “We’re not all the same, you know. Our bodies need different things. For some reason, mine needs zinc.”

“Well, it is in rocks,” he said. “I could get you one from the backyard.”

“This is not a joke! Zinc is an essential trace element! And it has a flexible coordination geometry that allows proteins using it to rapidly shift conformations to perform biological reactions!”

He said I sounded like Wikipedia.

“Yeah,” I admitted. “I looked it up this morning.”

In the weeks that followed, I searched around online for substitutes, eventually deciding I might be better off ordering each of the ingredients separately.

So, I ordered a large bottle of zinc and additional bottles of B, E and C.

They arrived a few days later and the next thing you know, I was drinking my morning coffee while trying to swallow 17 pills.

It was crazy.

Days after that, I was Googling “ZBEC” and found a bottle on some obscure website for $95. It was the same brand (and size) that I had been getting previously for $24.99.

I considered ordering some, then looked at myself in the mirror and screamed, “Are you out of your mind?”

(Obviously, zinc withdrawal drives you mad.)

For the last few months, I haven’t been taking anything. But, over the weekend, I went back onto Amazon, searched “zinc” and discovered this Q-Defend stuff.

It was described thusly: Quercetin 1000 mg, zinc 50 mg, vitamin C 1000 mg, vitamin D 5000 IU, bromelain, elderberry. With artemisinin, sea moss, echinacea and garlic.”

Sounded like a salad!

I had no idea what quercetin was, so I looked it up and found this: “Quercetin is a plant flavonol from the flavonoid group of polyphenols.”

(In case you’re interested, I still don’t know what it is.)

Do you take vitamin supplements? Do you take minerals? Botanicals?

I don’t pretend to understand all of this stuff and I’m well aware that some people thrive without any vitamins whatsoever.

I do believe, though, that if something works for you, and you like it, and it’s made by a reputable brand, there’s probably no reason not to take it.

So, at this writing, I am anxiously staring out the window, waiting for my new vitamins to arrive.

This is eerily similar to how I was a year and a half ago. Then, days after learning my ZBECs were out of stock, I saw my carrier put a substantial looking package in my mailbox.

Yes!

I dashed downstairs, euphorically, certain that the whole “out of stock” business had been some terrible mistake.

Instead, I found a small box of chocolate truffles, with a card that said, “So sorry to hear about your grandmother.”

This article originally appeared on NorthJersey.com: What happens when your vitamin supplements run out? ∣ Ervolino