It’s hard to swallow what Michelle will do to raise money for BAHS

“I found you some cat food I think you can eat,” my pal and fellow Belleville Area Humane Society board member, Cori Jurgensmeyer, recently told me.

She pushed two tiny tins across the table toward me. I picked them up and examined the ingredients.

Both were all natural. No fillers or by-products. One contained shredded chicken. The other, beef in tender bite-sized pieces.

“You can keep the beef one,” I told her. “I don’t eat red meat.”

I do, however, eat chocolate. And so I devised a plan ...

“I’ll dip the cat food in chocolate to get it down,” I told my BFF Lydia Kachigian.

“Getting it down is one thing,” Lydia said. “But keeping it down is another story.”

This story begins with a “Slumber PAWty” — an annual BAHS fundraiser, during which participants pledge to the spend night in a kennel with a shelter animal in exchange for donations.

I’d be out of town the night of the event so I pledged to eat Fancy Feast dipped in chocolate instead. I set my fundraising goal at $2,000 — my minimum for eating cat food — and set about soliciting donations on Facebook.

Over the next several days, I followed my friends’ responses.

“Cat food dipped in chocolate? Yuck!” my friend Kelly Carron posted. “Do you know what they make that stuff out of?”

Despite her concerns, Kelly donated to the cause. So did a lot of other people.

“My understanding is you’ll eat anything dipped in chocolate,” my pal, Jim Dissett said. “So this really isn’t much of a sacrifice is it?”

Well, Jim, I didn’t think it would be. But the closer I got to my $2,000 goal, the more my pledge left a bad taste in my mouth.

“Did I say I’m eating ‘Fancy Feast’ dipped in chocolate?” I jokingly texted my fellow BAHS board members. “Typo! I’m eating ‘a fancy feast’ dipped in chocolate. That shows you the difference punctuation can make!”

Thank goodness for Cori. If she hadn’t found a gourmet version of Fancy Feast cat food consisting only of shredded white meat chicken and sunflower oil, I’m not sure what I’d do.

“Oh you know what you’d do,” my pal, Lydia said. “You’d hold your nose and eat it anyway.”

Full disclosure: Last year, I ate a peanut butter-flavored dog treat topped with chocolate sauce for the same fundraiser. That stunt brought in $3,300 dollars for the shelter.

I like to think my animal-loving pals would have contributed regardless. But I wanted to make them laugh while they were doing it.

“So last year you raised $3,300 for eating a peanut butter dog treat — and this year you’re only getting $2,000 for eating chocolate-dipped cat food?” Lydia mused. “Cat food is a lot grosser. They should be coughing up donations like hairballs.”

Hmmm. She does have a point ...

How to donate

My BAHS Slumber PAWty fundraiser will continue online through noon Sunday, March 26. If you could find it in your heart to access the link below and help a cat-food eating columnist out, that would be PURRRfect! To donate online, please visit https://www.shelterslumberpawty.com/story/Jq69gf.

Donations via checks can be made out to the Belleville Area Humane Society, 1301 South 11th Street, Belleville IL 62226, just write Michelle/Slumber PAWty on the memo line.

All donations are tax deductible. The homeless animals thank you — and so do I.