Healthy relationships: Many events will mark Domestic Violence Awareness Month in Centre County

Jennifer Pencek
·4 min read

With October serving as national Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), Centre Safe and partners like Penn State’s Gender Equity Center are joining forces to spread education and prevention efforts across the region and remind the community that #Every1KnowsSome1 impacted by domestic violence.

The term domestic violence refers to abusive behaviors including degrading remarks/cruel jokes, threatening looks, constant monitoring, economic exploitation, punches and kicks, sexual abuse, and homicide. All these tactics are used by abusers to gain power and control over their victims. Unchecked, domestic violence almost always increases in frequency and severity.

Domestic violence comes in many forms including:

  • Physical abuse

  • Verbal abuse

  • Emotional abuse

  • Sexual abuse

  • Financial abuse

  • Stalking

Many victims suffer all forms of abuse. Verbal and emotional abuse may be more subtle than physical harm, but this does not mean it is less destructive to victims.

People often struggle with the fact that a victim may not leave their abuser or leave right away. Remember, we may like to think we know exactly what we would do in a particular situation, but you never know what you would do until you are in the same situation and obviously every case is incredibly different. While it may seem like a simple decision to those outside the relationship, victims of abuse often face multiple barriers to leaving, including:

  • Financial dependence

  • Worry over the abuser getting in trouble

  • Fear about other friends, colleagues and peers finding out

  • Desire to keep family together

  • Hope that the abuse will stop

  • Pressure from family

  • Denial

  • Shame

  • Lack of resources

  • Other types of fear

Many people believe that victims of domestic violence will be safe once they separate from the abusers. They also believe that victims are free to leave abusers at any time. However, leaving does not usually put an end to the violence. Abusers often escalate their violence to coerce a victim into reconciliation or to retaliate for the victim’s rejection or abandonment of the abuser.

Abusers who believe they are entitled to a relationship with victims or that they “own” their partners view a victim’s leaving as the ultimate betrayal. Because of this, leaving an abusive relationship can be an extremely dangerous time. This does not mean victims should stay. Living with an abuser is highly dangerous because the violence usually escalates and becomes more frequent over time. However, if a victim is planning to leave, safety planning is extremely important. Advocates from Centre Safe can work directly with victims through our hotline and assorted services.

In 2022 alone, Centre Safe supported more than 900 clients navigating domestic violence. It is on all of us to decide how we plan to support survivors, honor those lost to domestic violence, and work together to eliminate this pervasive form of abuse. I know this crime can seem so overwhelming and big, but if we choose each day to spread awareness, stand up for others, and acknowledge the normalization of this behavior, we absolutely can and will make a difference.

Events during the month include:

Turn the Courthouse purple

All month — The Bellefonte courthouse will be lit purple in honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Purple Lights Campaign

All month — Support victims/survivors of domestic violence by displaying purple lights during October.

Empty Place at the Table

Empty Place at the Table honors the lives lost to domestic violence in Centre County from 1998-2023. Visit a display to learn parts of victims’ stories and honor their lives taken too soon.

St. Mark Lutheran Church Snydertown — All month

Grace Lutheran Church, State College — Oct. 1-15

Penn State Gender Equity Center — Oct. 3-31

Moshannon Valley YMCA — Oct. 2-8

State College YMCA – Oct. 9-15

Penns Valley YMCA – Oct. 16-22

Bellefonte YMCA – Oct. 23-30

Screening of ‘Alice, Darling’

Oct. 5, 5-7 p.m., Flex Theater on Penn State Campus

This film offers a haunting look at how difficult it can be to leave an abusive relationship — and the value of a solid support network.

The Clothesline Project

Oct. 9-27, various locations at Penn State

The Clothesline Project is a movement giving voice to those who have been silenced, sending the message help is available and there is a path to healing.

Domestic Violence Awareness Month Proclamation

10 a.m. Oct. 10, Commissioners meeting, Willowbank Building, 420 Holmes St., Bellefonte

Magic Show with Jon Dorenbos

Oct. 18, 6:30 p.m., Heritage Hall, Penn State

When Jon Dorenbos is on stage, he emphasizes the importance of choice and shares his childhood tragedy. When he was 12, his father murdered his mother. Jon chose to rise through adversity and accomplish goals.

Purple Thursday Campaign

Oct. 19

Tabling in the HUB-Robeson Center from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Wear purple to support those who have experienced domestic violence and abuse and stand in solidarity with victims and survivors.

Jennifer Pencek is the executive director of Centre Safe, which provides free and confidential services for anyone in Centre County, including counseling, advocacy, legal support, outreach and education, shelter, transitional housing, and safe custody exchanges/supervised visitations via its Child Access Center. Centre Safe’s 24/7 hotline is toll-free at 877-234-5050. Learn more at www.centresafe.org .