HEY, WILLIE! Another vote for NASCAR over Formula One, unless you like math and robots
HEY, WILLIE!
During last Sunday’s combination of NASCAR on one channel and Formula One on another, I flipped back and forth but mostly watched NASCAR.
F1’s only excitement is in the first turn of the first lap. Three-second pit stops from the robots makes for no excitement to see where they start after a yellow flag.
At least in NASCAR, if it says the No. 22 car is 5.67 seconds behind, I know that’s behind the leader and not the car ahead of him.
In watching an F1 race, I need a calculator to figure out how far behind the leader all drivers are, except for second place.
NASCAR JOHNNY
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HEY, JOHNNY!
Modern F1 seems like a competition to see who can build the best ground-based space ship with the proper astronaut at the controls.
Largely through the Netflix series — “Drive to Survive” — they do their best to insert some human element. But to the fairly untrained eye, it’s mostly a matter of watching exotic machines do things cars aren’t supposed to do, and doing those things on wonderful race courses, often with postcard-worthy international backdrops.
Rest assured, things can and sometimes do go wrong with those lightning-fast pit stops. Just not often. They’re quite impressive, and frankly, NASCAR is gradually getting there, with the Next Gen car taking the fastest pit stops down to below 10 seconds.
While there’s still some human element involved in a NASCAR pit stop, there’s also a bit of Russian roulette: You never know when a lug nut will misfire and send a loose wheel bounding down the pit lane.
Actually, that sounds like a quality prop bet some gambling app should punch into the weekly offerings.
HEY, WILLIE!
We native Arkadelphians and Ouachitonians thank you for featuring our young man, our town and our school in your paper. In honor of your article, I have been wearing my purple Ouachita Tigers T-shirt around town.
Although you got your definition of Arkadelphia from Wikipedia, it is probably not quite accurate. The ancient Greeks considered Delphi to be the center of the universe and it was later a sacred city.
Philadelphia has always been labeled the “City of Brotherly Love” and Arkadelphia is most likely considered the city of the circle or center of the circle, although it is not the center of Arkansas.
DIANE IN DELAND
HEY, DIANE!
This is the latest response to our (over-)coverage of the Jags taking Gregory Junior in the sixth round of the recent NFL Draft. Junior is the first Ouachita Baptist Tiger taken in the draft.
Wasn’t expecting a crash course in geometry, geography and ancient Greek chatter, but there you go.
HEY, WILLIE!
If college basketball and the NBA can have different 3-point lines, why can’t they have baskets of different heights and move the NBA rims higher?
The game has changed big-time in the pros. These guys are giants compared to the peach-basket days.
MICK
HEY, MICK!
I go back to my genius solution from years back. Since many purists and dunk-happy fans would howl at raising the rims, how 'bout we lower the floor?
Do I have to think of everything?
Frankly, you might’ve stumbled on another brilliant idea: Actual peach baskets. True, there’d be a delay to retrieve the ball after each score, but judging from the size of the modern peach basket, it’d be damn tough to get a basketball in there.
HEY, WILLIE!
The 22nd edition of the Loo Cup will take place at the Trevose Golf Club in Padstow, England, starting May 23.
We were delayed three years in getting the 22nd event played, due to COVID — go figure.
We’ll have 32 golfers competing against Team Europe with the regular Ryder Cup format. We haven’t won in Europe the last three times we’ve gone there, but we’re still undefeated at LPGA International.
KEVIN
HEY, KEVIN!
The Loo Cup began 20-some years ago innocently enough — assuming you consider beer a quality alibi.
Some golf nuts would visit here from England and combine a genuine golf competition — at LPGA International — with several days of visiting local libraries and museums (or something like that).
It’s grown to the point that the locals will send 32 golfers to England next week, and next year the Brits will probably send 32 our way.
International diplomacy, just as Jefferson, Franklin, and maybe even Adams envisioned it.
And since we’re talking golf, yep, here’s the latest offering . . .
HEY, WILLIE!
I was playing the South Course at Daytona and was paired with an elderly gentleman. When we got to the seventh hole, along Beville Road, a funeral procession was going by.
The elderly gentleman took off his hat and put it over his heart. I said, "Wow, that's really nice of you."
He replied, “Ahh, that's the least I could do, since we were married for 43 years.”
MARK
HEY, MARK!
The handful of readers who hadn’t heard that one surely enjoyed it.
As did the big handful of my readers who had likely forgotten it. You know who you are.
— Reach Ken Willis at ken.willis@news-jrnl.com
This article originally appeared on The Daytona Beach News-Journal: NASCAR or F1? The choice is easy, unless you like math and robots
