This Calorie-Counting Bracelet Is a Triumph in Lazy Dieting

Molly Mulshine
The Healbe GoBe (Screengrab via IndieGoGo)

The Healbe GoBe (Screengrab via IndieGoGo)

There are a ton of diets (and diet apps) in the world, and none of them actually work. The only thing that will truly make you lose weight is to eat fewer calories than you burn every day. And to do that, you have to do math. Nobody wants that.

So we were thrilled when we stumbled upon the magical Healbe GoBe (?!?!) bracelet. It counts the calories you consume and burn by monitoring cellular glucose levels through your skin. All you have to do is show up.

The oddly named device also monitors your heart rate and daily exertion level, and acts as a FitBit‐esque accelerometer in case you feel like exercising for some reason. The Healbe GoBe can also tell you your stress levels, hydration levels and sleep status, in case you aren't sure whether you're conscious or not. It also automatically sends the data to an app on your iPhone or Android, thereby decreasing your made‐up diet workload even more.

Healbe GoBe has exceeded its $100,000 fundraising goal fourfold, having currently amassed $440,000 from depraved dieters just like you and me. They're hoping to make the bracelet available "as soon as June 2014," their IndieGoGo says. Until then, maybe try one of these insane tech diets to hold you over?