These Hilarious Halloween Jokes Will Have the Little Monsters Screaming With Delight

These Hilarious Halloween Jokes Will Have the Little Monsters Screaming With Delight
·4 min read

Trick or treat! Halloween has arrived! Prepare for candy, costumes and pumpkin spice lattes galore! If you're frightfully festive each holiday, you'll surely be a fan of our Halloween jokes. These ones in particular will make you laugh so much your head will roll. So while you're busy breaking out the fangs and glitter eyeshadow (since, after all, this is the season for rocking your fiercest costumes and putting your makeup skills to good use!), you can trade some of these fun Halloween jokes and puns with your little monsters. Our list also includes knock-knock jokes for kids and will keep you giggling all season.

If you're in need of more fun ideas to fill your holiday with joy, you'll be thrilled with our Halloween games, pumpkin carving ideas and Halloween crafts for kids!

Halloween Trick or Treat Jokes

  • What do birds say on Halloween? "Trick or tweet!"

  • Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating? Because they have no-body to go with.

  • Where do ghosts buy their Halloween candy? At the ghost-ery store!

  • What do owls say when they go trick or treating? "Happy Owl-ween!"

  • What do ghosts give out to trick or treaters? Booberries!

  • Who did Frankenstein go trick or treating with? His ghoul friend.

  • What Halloween candy is never on time for the party? Choco-LATE!

  • What do witches put on to go trick or treating? Mas-scare-a.

  • What does Bigfoot say when he asks for candy? "Trick-or-feet!"

  • Which type of pants do ghosts wear to trick or treat? Boo jeans.

  • What makes trick or treating with twin witches so challenging? You never know which witch is which!

  • What happens when a vampire goes in the snow? Frost bite!

  • What do you call two witches living together? Broommates

  • What position does a ghost play in hockey? Ghoulie.

Photo credit: fotostorm - Getty Images
Photo credit: fotostorm - Getty Images

Halloween Knock Knock Jokes

  • Knock, Knock! Who's there? Boo! Boo who? Don't cry … it's just my Halloween costume!

  • Knock, Knock! Who's there? Witch! Witch who? Witch one of you will give me lots of Halloween candy?

  • Knock, Knock! Who's there? Phillip! Phillip who? Phillip my bag with Halloween candy, please!

  • Knock Knock! Who’s there? Dishes! Dishes who? Dishes a very Halloween bad joke!

  • Knock Knock! Who’s there? Olive! Olive who? Olive your Halloween costume!

  • Knock Knock! Who’s there? Bee! Bee who? Bee-ware, there’s a full moon this Halloween!

  • Knock, knock! Who’s there? Butter. Butter who? Butter open quick, I have a funny Halloween joke to tell you!

  • Knock Knock! Who’s there? Fangs. Fangs who? Fangs for letting me in!

  • Knock Knock! Who’s there? Hans. Hans who? Hans off my candy!

  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ivana. Ivana Who? Ivana suck your blood!

  • Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Ben! Ben who? Ben waiting for Halloween all year!

Photo credit: Sergeeva - Getty Images
Photo credit: Sergeeva - Getty Images

Halloween Monster Jokes

  • What do mummies listen to on Halloween? Wrap music.

  • How do you make a skeleton laugh? You tickle his funny bone!

  • Which Halloween monster is good at math? Count Dracula!

  • Why did the Cyclops give up teaching? He only had one pupil!

  • Why didn't the skeleton go to see a scary movie? He didn't have the guts.

  • What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost? "You sure are boo-tiful!"

  • Where does Dracula keep his money? In a blood bank.

  • Why are ghosts terrible liars? You can see right through them!

  • Why don’t mummies take vacations? They’re afraid to unwind.

  • What is a vampire's favorite holiday, besides Halloween? Fangs-giving!

  • Where do fashionable ghosts shop? Bootiques!

  • What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet!

  • What room does a ghost not need? A living room.

  • What monster plays tricks on Halloween? Prank-enstein!

Photo credit: Peter Dazeley - Getty Images
Photo credit: Peter Dazeley - Getty Images

Halloween Food Jokes

  • What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I scream.

  • What does the skeleton chef say when he serves you a meal? "Bone Appetit!"

  • What is a vampire's favorite fruit? A neck-tarine!

  • What do witches put on their bagels? Scream cheese.

  • What do ghosts eat for dinner? Spook-ghetti!

  • What do skeletons order at restaurants? Spare ribs.

  • What does a panda ghost eat? Bam-BOO!

  • What tops off a mummy’s ice cream sundae? Whipped scream.

  • What’s a ghost's favorite yogurt flavor? Boo-berry!

  • What’s a vampire’s least favorite meal? A steak!

  • Why was the candy corn booed off the stage? All of his jokes were too corny!

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