HPU family, police bond amid tragedy

Dec. 9—HIGH POINT — In the past year, the family of a High Point University student who died in a car crash and the High Point Police Department, which investigated it, have forged a deep bond amid tragedy.

On Dec. 11, 2022, Gavin Graybill was killed when the Toyota Tacoma he was driving slammed into the rear of the shopping center along Westchester Drive near the intersection of Burton Avenue. A police accident report indicates Graybill was going 55 mph when he crashed.

The Graybill family from Massachusetts says that during the investigation, which spanned a period of months, they took comfort during their mourning in the compassionate and thorough way that the police worked with them.

The bond developed most intensely between Lt. Jeffrey Crouse, one of the leaders of the investigation, and the student's father, Chad Graybill. Crouse and Graybill still stay in touch through phone calls, personal get-togethers and emails, a connection sustained as recently as the Thanksgiving holiday.

"Jeffrey involved me in a way that I felt part of the process," Graybill said. "I could focus my energy on understanding and not basking in the grief."

Graybill said the professionalism and caring began with the initial set of police officers, High Point Fire Department crews and paramedics who arrived at the crash scene and carried through to the investigators.

"I couldn't have designed a better group of people to help us through all of this," he said. "It is the grace of God that it happened with that group of people."

Gavin Graybill, 20, was the only person in the car that crashed into the shopping center just before 2:15 p.m. on the second Sunday in December of last year.

From the outset, police wanted to determine what prompted the wreck. Investigators concluded that the student took his own life.

"We actually found a suicide note," Crouse said.

The note was found at Gavin Graybill's residence in High Point. Police had to inform the family not only that Gavin Graybill was dead but that he had killed himself.

"Very early on in the investigation, we determined that it was a suicide, like within hours of the crash," Crouse said. "The parents' main concern was why did he do this. We told them we would do everything we could to find that out."

To keep their pledge to the family, the police did extensive interviews with people who knew Gavin Graybill and drew search warrants to examine his computer and electronic devices. The police spent two to three months seeking a reason.

Crouse kept Chad Graybill informed with phone conversations that would last an hour or longer. Graybill also made trips to High Point to speak with Crouse in person.

"We would sit down over a cup of coffee and talk, sometimes for hours," Crouse said. "Me and him have some of the same interests outside our professional lives, and we talked about that. About our faith in God, about being a father."

Crouse said that the police response to Gavin Graybill's death showed the family that officers were doing everything possible to try to pinpoint a clear reason why the young man took his own life.

"We never did," Crouse said.

Even after the investigation was exhausted, the police and Graybill family have remained in touch. Crouse regularly has conversations with Chad Graybill to see how the family is holding up.

"Me and him have connected with each other," Crouse said.

To show their appreciation, the Graybill family made a financial contribution to pay for a meal for every member of the High Point Police Department. It ended up with 350 employees savoring a classic Southern barbecue meal this past August.

In an email linked with the contribution, the family said they grieve the death of a loved one who died so suddenly and unexpectedly, but they take solace that it happened in a city with police officers who deeply care.

"I thought that was kind of special," Crouse said.

In a statement this week to The Enterprise, the university said that "the High Point University family remains saddened by the loss of Gavin Graybill. He was a cherished member of our community."

Nothing will fully heal the emotional wound of the Graybill family, Crouse said, but the High Point Police Department has done everything it can to help them cope with their loss.

pjohnson@hpenews.com — 336-888-3528 — @HPEpaul