Jacksonville author: November a reminder that gratitude means more than fancy notepaper

I love pretty stationery ― especially the kind where my name is printed in a scrolled pastel font that makes me look like I hold a fancy title in a foreign land and live in a castle with 100 obedient cats. I know it’s hard to believe an ordinary name on card stock can conjure all that. Yet a blank notecard isn’t limited by possibility, only its weighty perimeter.

Gratitude is kind of like the stationery on which we write thank-you notes. It’s limitless in the places it can go. There have been countless studies that extoll the merits of gratitude. It has the power to not only reshape our brains, but almost every aspect related to a meaningful life.

According to an article by Harvard Health Publishing, “gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity and build strong relationships.”

We hear so much about gratitude in the month of November. We even see the word written in its own fancy font, as if it too ruled over its own castle. It’s a lovely word and we are given all kinds of suggestions of ways to harvest it in our lives (presuming that the sole reason of growing it is to keep it for ourselves). We are told to stockpile it, meditate on it and use it to make our lives more fulfilling.

Yet like so many positive messages that get twisted into an emphasis on self instead of others, we often forget how important it is to share gratitude. It means way more when it’s given away than when we keep it for ourselves. Gratitude gives life meaning, grows relationships and sustains us during the times between the hardships and the harvest.

We are often encouraged to feel gratitude because it makes us feel better, happier and healthier. While most of our gratitude originates from those we are closest to, it’s often these same people for whom we neglect to share our appreciation. Instead of giving gratitude to the people we love, we sometimes take them for granted instead.

Sometimes the words I’m most desperate to hear aren’t “I love you,” or “I’m sorry” or even “You look like a beautiful princess.” It’s “thank you.”

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“Thank you” means you see me. It means you feel my care for you and suggests that I’ve made your life better. It makes me feel like I did something that matters, which means more to me than all the fancy castles or loopy letters curving around the prettiest stationery.

Those plain but hardworking words may be the best prayer we can ever say. Ephesians 1:16 says, “I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers.” What if we were ceaseless in sharing gratitude? Can you imagine how the world might change if people actually knew how much they were loved and appreciated?

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The exponential kindness of expressed gratitude is way more satisfying than the morsels we get from merely feeling it. Say “thank you” to everyone you can and see just how much more gratitude you have to give away. Don’t save it for the fancy stationery or the finery on Thanksgiving Day. Get it out now and throw it like confetti from the top of a sky-covered castle.

What a joy it will be to see where it lands.

Lara C. Patangan is an inspirational author and speaker who writes about faith at LaraPatangan.com. Her first book, “Simple Mercies,” is available now.

This guest column is the opinion of the author and does not necessarily represent the views of the Times-Union. We welcome a diversity of opinions.

This article originally appeared on Florida Times-Union: Gratitude means the most when shared ― don't save it for Thanksgiving