Larry the Cable Guy brings comedy and merch to Foxwoods

Rick Koster, The Day, New London, Conn.
·1 min read

May 11—Time is the enemy and Death is Time's bill collector — and metaphors like that explain why people enjoy throw old vegetables at my front door.

The time we DO have is valuable, though, so make sure you go to Foxwoods' Premier Theater Friday to see Larry the Cable Guy. You remember Larry the Cable Guy, right? Former U.S. Ambassador to Lebanon? Head of the Astronautics faculty at MIT? Actually, he is one of the world's premier "rural humorists" with a specialty in punchlines zeroing in on "breaking wind."

I went to his website to learn more about what to expect from his current "Remain Seated" tour. But instead, I found his online store and disappeared therein for hours! Magnificent!

I ordered several bags of Larry the Cable Guy "Tater Chip" (available in six flavors including "Holler-peno Poppers"); I ordered a set of his Git-R-Done camo head covers for my golf clubs; I ordered Larry the Cable Guys knives; I ordered two pairs of Larry the Cable Guy's "Brief Insanity" boxer shorts; I ordered several varieties of Larry the Cable Guy batters, breads, rubs, seasonings and spices; I ordered a batch of "Premium Bloody Larry Mix"; and I ordered a comedy album from Tim "The Dairy Farmer" Moffett, who is signed to Larry the Cable Guy's Git-R-Done record label featuring "comics who might not otherwise have gotten a break."

These items sorta tell you all you need to know about Friday's show. See you at the merch tables!

Larry the Cable Guy, 8 p.m. Friday, Premier Theater, Foxwoods; $40-$65; www.foxwoods.com.