Let's Talk About the Massive Bull Semen Explosion in Australia

Evan Romano
Photo credit: Peter Olsen Photography - Getty Images

From Men's Health

  • A fire in Australia led to a massive explosion of 100 bull semen-filled cylinders.
  • No, I did not expect to be thinking about this at any point today.
  • It's a "huge blow" to local farmers.

There was a huge fire at a cattle breeding facility in Australia, and at least 100 cylinders filled with bull semen were destroyed in the aftermath of a blaze that took hours to extinguish.

Look, when I woke up this morning I wasn't expecting to read about a giant semen explosion, either. But we're here, it's a thing that's happened, so now we're all in this together.

This was a breeding facility, so these cattle were being artificially inseminated. And, well, they've gotta store that stuff somewhere. Clearly the answer was in these (now-destroyed) cylinders. According to the local Country Fire Authority Gippsland commander, Chris Loeschenkohl, when his team was tackling the fire's blaze, there were "projectiles" flying at them—the tops of the cylinders, forced off by the rapid expansion of what was inside.

"The liquid inside the cylinders was rapidly expanding and essentially the lids of the cryogenic cylinders were just popping off the top and projectiles were being thrown from the building," Loeschenkohl told the local ABC network, in quite possibly the most disgusting thing ever uttered.

There was money lost here as well. Not only was the facility itself completely destroyed, but the cylinders of bull semen—valued between $342 and $684 (converted to U.S. dollars)—were, too. Bull semen is supposedly sold by the "straw," which, again, is just quite simply not anything I imagined I'd be learning when I woke up to go to work this morning.

"We're coming into the [Artificial Insemination] season, so there would have been substantial amounts of semen inside the tanks that we've lost, which was owned by our local farmers," said Yarram Herd Services Committee vice chairman Aaron Thomas. "It can range in value from $5 per straw to $95 per straw."

Thomas also said that losing the 100 cylinders of semen would be a "huge blow" to the local farmers. No, I do not believe that he actually used that wording, either, but here we are.

I think that's all we've got to talk about here. I hope you all have a wonderful rest of your day.

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