Are liberals starting to see a downside to multiculturalism?
Back in 2015, Hamtramck in Michigan became the first American city to elect a Muslim-majority council. Naturally, liberals celebrated this milestone for multiculturalism, while leading media outlets hailed it as a triumphant success. “Residents in Hamtramck from different religious and cultural backgrounds coexist in harmony,” beamed the BBC.
Sadly, however, this verdict may now need to be reconsidered. Because Hamtramck’s Muslim council has just voted to ban Pride flags: the rainbow-coloured symbols of the LGBT community.
For the Guardian – which had previously run articles hailing Hamtramck’s “multicultural populace” – this development appears to have come as a terrible shock. Local liberals, it reported at the weekend, had initially welcomed the election of the Muslim council as “a meaningful rebuke” of Donald Trump and his “Islamophobic rhetoric”. Yet now they could only look on “in dismay” as “Muslim residents packing city hall erupted in cheers after the council’s unanimous vote”.
Karen Majewski, a former mayor of the city, said there was “a sense of betrayal”. Frankly, I suspect that what local liberals are mostly feeling is bewilderment. After all, if a Christian council had banned the Pride flag, liberals would have known exactly how to respond. Denounce the council for its queerphobic bigotry, and lead a furious protest march against heteronormative, patriarchal white supremacy. Simple.
Unfortunately, though, this council isn’t Christian. As a result, American liberals are being forced to contemplate an awkward dilemma. Their whole purpose in life is to defend marginalised minorities. But what should they do when one marginalised minority marginalises another marginalised minority? Whose side should they take?
Logically it should be the side of the minority being marginalised. Which in this case is people who are LGBT. But if liberals fight the ban on the Pride flag, the Muslim council could accuse them of marginalising Muslims, by refusing to respect their democratic decisions. Liberals, they could add, are guilty of cultural imperialism, by forcing Muslims to conform to certain values. They could even accuse them of Islamophobia. A thought to strike terror into every progressive heart.
These poor liberals. They spend their lives righteously defending minorities from conservatives – not realising that minorities can be conservative themselves.
Paws for thought
A schoolgirl in East Sussex has apparently informed her classmates that she now identifies as a cat. Some people, I’m sorry to say, have cast doubt on this claim. As a parent, however, I think it’s perfectly plausible. It explains why so many teenagers sleep all day, go out all night, and treat everyone else in their household with disdain, except when they want something. Clearly they identify as cats, too.
Even if they don’t, the phenomenon is more widespread than you might think. In February last year, Bristol University provided its staff with a guide to gender inclusion – and it linked to sources about people who identify as cats. They’re known as “catgender”, and their pronouns are “nya/nyan”. Although, since cats tend not to speak English, I don’t suppose it matters too much if you get it wrong.
At any rate, a teacher at the school in East Sussex is reported to have scolded a pupil for refusing to recognise her classmate’s new feline identity. I congratulate the teacher on taking such a principled stand. It just goes to show how far we’ve come as a society. During an episode of Celebrity Big Brother in 2006, George Galloway was seen making purring noises, lapping up a saucer of imaginary milk, and encouraging a fellow contestant to stroke him behind the ears. For this he was cruelly ridiculed. In these more inclusive times, however, I like to think he would be fully accepted as the adorable little pussycat he is, and rewarded with a delicious bowl of Dreamies.
Either way, it would be a mistake to dismiss the significance of this story. I predict it will have a major impact on British politics. From now on, in every interview Sir Keir Starmer gives, the poor man will be asked whether a woman can have a tail. Meanwhile, the SNP will allow convicted criminals to be housed in catteries. And the Lib Dems will call for every public lavatory to have a litter tray.
So no more of this hurtful prejudice and mockery. It’s time we treated the catgender community with respect. At least until they start doing their business in our flowerbeds.
Way of the World is a twice-weekly satirical look at the headlines aiming to mock the absurdities of the modern world. It is published at 7am every Tuesday and Saturday
