I’m off to London to cover a musical about the Gwyneth Paltrow trial — because someone has to do it

In one of my most exciting adventures this year, I’m headed overseas to cover the musical retelling of Utah’s greatest export in recent memory — the Gwyneth Paltrow trial.

I’ll be traveling to Pleasance Theatre, a small performance venue in the heart of London. There, the production company Awkward Productions is debuting its latest show, “Gwyneth Goes Skiing.”

In 2016, Paltrow, the A-list actor turned Goop founder, and retired optometrist Terry Sanderson collided while skiing at Deer Valley Resort. Sanderson sued Paltrow for $3 million, claiming she had collided with him and caused multiple injuries. Paltrow countersued for $1.

The trial, which took place last winter in Park City, became a global pop culture spectacle viewed by millions via the cameras in the courtroom live-streaming the entirety of the proceedings. Multiple moments from the trial went viral online — Paltrow’s impeccable ensembles, Sanderson’s lawyer fawning, the internet’s collective crush on defense attorney and Clark Kent doppelganger James Egan, and Paltrow’s final words to Sanderson after the jury ruled in her favor: “I wish you well.”

It shouldn’t be a surprise, then, that the trial has been turned into a stage production, which, if the Pleasance Theatre’s description is any indication, promises 90 minutes of delightful chaos:

She’s the Goop-founding, Door-Sliding, Shakespeare-In-Loving, consciously-uncoupling Hollywood superstar. He’s a retired optometrist from Utah. In 2016, they went skiing.

On the slopes of Deer Valley, their worlds collided, and so did they — literally. Ouch. Seven years later in 2023, they went to court. Double ouch.

This is their story. Kind of. Not really. But also, it’s at Christmas.

Related

• A conversation with James Egan, the Clark Kent of the Paltrow trial

• The Gwyneth Paltrow ski trial is being turned into a musical

The advertisement isn’t giving me a whole lot to work with in terms of what to expect. All I really know for sure is that there will be at least two characters in the play, Linus Karp as Gwyneth Paltrow and Joseph Martin as Terry Sanderson.

Beyond that, I’ve had to make some assumptions.

I’m assuming “Gwyneth Goes Skiing” is a comedy, given a man in a wig will be playing Paltrow (although I would love to see this in a drama). I’m assuming it’s a musical since there’s an original music credit listed for Leland of “Rupaul’s Drag Race” fame.

And I’m assuming “Gwyneth Goes Skiing” will portray both the 2016 accident and the 2023 trial. So I asked Paltrow’s trial attorneys, Stephen Owens and James Egan, how they felt about their work being acted on the stage.

They both said they laughed when they read about the play. “The trial was extremely serious, of course, but there is some humor to be found in hindsight,” Owens said.

Owens and Egan told me that during the trial the atmosphere at their Epperson and Owens firm office was noisy — people from all over the world called and emailed to offer their thoughts and advice on the trial and the entire firm staff was busy fielding calls and sorting messages.

“We knew it would have some press but we had no idea the broad appeal it would have,” Owens said.

After the trial’s conclusion, work life returned to normal and things at the office have been quiet for the past nine months, they explained. Until news of the play broke.

“It was this surprise, out of nowhere fun and unexpected thing,” Egan told me. “Nobody was expecting a musical.”

Indeed, no one ‘round these parts saw this coming. Utah and Utah-adjacent social media have been atwitter (no pun intended) since learning of the production. I, for one, have a real sense of pride in my state for having hosted the trial of the century. The world’s eyes haven’t been so focused on us since the 2002 Olympics, and I’m thrilled that we have a chance to revel in that attention once more. Like a bunch of super seniors returning to our high school for the homecoming game.

And I couldn’t be more honored to be one of the first Utahns to see the play and report back. I promise to try my best not to embarrass our state in my journeys. I will refrain from asking random British citizens if they can tell me where I can find Harry Potter and/or Styles. I will not yell “MIND THE GAP” when in the Tube, as much as I may want to. And I will resist the temptation to greet anyone I meet with “Blimey, guv’nor.”

I also promise to deliver every last detail about “Gwyneth Goes Skiing” with all the reporting skills in my quiver.

“Prepare to be gooped,” the Pleasance Theatre description states. I have, and I will.

A version of this article first appeared in The Park Record.