Mark Bennett: Afghan 'happy' family safe and that he's helping others

Nov. 3—A father stood in waist-high river of sewer water, clinging to his wife and their young family.

It was the first step toward freedom and safety in the United States — and for awhile in a place called Terre Haute, Indiana.

For two dangerous weeks, Abdul tried to get through the chaos and crowds amassed at Hamid Karzai International Airport in Kabul, Afghanistan during August 2021.

Abdul, his family and all the other people desperately wanted to board an outbound flight to escape the uncertainty in Afghanistan as U.S. forces withdrew after 20 years of war and the Taliban began taking control of that central Asian nation. Several attempts by Abdul and his family didn't succeed.

Each time, the scene was pandemonium. Throngs of distraught people often pushed and shoved, shouted and argued, and children cried.

Finally, as the Aug. 31 deadline neared to evacuate before the Taliban's full takeover, Abdul received a tip about a place along the airport's perimeter that might enable him and his family to get through to a flight. They were told to go to a small bridge over a polluted stream.

But the bridge was packed with other people longing to escape. So, Abdul and his loved ones waded into the dirty water below to wait for their chance.

"I chose to go into the dirty water to save my life and my family's life," Abdul said last week.

For several days, they would leave their home and try to get into the airport by wading again into that smelly stream. Abdul hoped they would be there at the moment when a shift of American guards — who might recognize Abdul favorably from his job at the U.S. Embassy (a role that even his extended family was unaware of) — took over from others at the checkpoint. Abdul almost got through once, but he was alone and wanted to phone his family and tell them to hurry there to join him. Instead, the guards told him to go home.

Abdul wasn't going to leave without his wife, children and his nephew. Their lives could be in danger from Taliban reprisals, if they didn't make it out.

"I was very worried about my life and my family's life," Abdul said last week.

Then, they got break.

"When we returned the next time, we were all together and a nice American soldier must have felt sorry for us and literally plucked us all out of the dirty water and brought us through the gate," Abdul recalled in a narrative he co-wrote this past summer.

With only two backpacks of belongings, they boarded a flight and soon landed in the safety of Abu Dhabi in the United Arab Emirates. They stayed in Abu Dhabi until the following spring of 2022 and then came to America. On June 7, 2022, Abdul and his family arrived in Terre Haute. They became one of three Afghan refugee families to resettle here — assisted by community volunteers and the local group Operation Heart — before all moved elsewhere.

Abdul and his family lived here until moving in June 2023 to New Mexico, resettling — once again — in a town with more than a dozen Afghan refugee families. They moved to New Mexico as Terre Haute friends and retirees Arthur Feinsod and his wife Mary Kramer also moved to New Mexico.

During his family's year in Terre Haute, Abdul found work, local support and care for his family, English language instruction and peace.

"People of Terre Haute were very generous," Abdul said in an audiovisual Zoom interview last week from New Mexico, assisted by Feinsod.

Abdul and his family were inspired to follow Feinsod and Kramer to New Mexico by the presence of other Afghan families there. New Mexico also offered Abdul a work situation that reduced his family's housing costs. Feinsod, as president of the Interfaith Council of the Wabash Valley, developed a friendship with Abdul's family while helping connect them with the Islamic Center of Terre Haute, allowing them to practice their faith.

Abdul's family built friendships with numerous Hauteans, such as retired teacher Denise Sobieski, Feinsod explained.

Residents of Terre Haute "were really helpful people there," Abdul said.

"I had a good time in Terre Haute with all the community members who helped introduce me to the community and helped me with the housing," Abdul added. "I appreciate them. I had a good friendship with them."

"He's a very courageous man," Feinsod said of Abdul, who asked to be identified by only his first name.

Abdul and his family are among the 90,000 Afghan refugees who have been evacuated and resettled in the U.S. since 2021, according to the U.S. State Department's Operation Allies Refuge.

Adapting to American culture and the English language, and finding employment while assimilating, are among the challenges Afghans encounter.

Still, Abdul "is a man who likes challenges," Feinsod said. "He has lived with big challenges his whole life. Just getting out of Afghanistan was a big challenge, and he did great — he got out, and he got his family out, and also brought his nephew out."

Abdul works with a community services agency that assists migrants, including those from Mexico as well as other Afghan refugees. His wife works with them, too.

"I'm really happy to be beneficial to some of the Afghan families, a little bit," Abdul said. Listening alongside in the interview last week, Feinsod said Abdul was being typically humble. Feinsod cited an example of Abdul's generosity.

An Afghan refugee family in their New Mexico community needed to attend an important meeting on their immigration status in El Paso, Texas, but couldn't rent a car because of a denied credit card. They also needed an interpreter at that meeting.

Abdul and his wife decided to help.

"I told them, 'OK, I will go with them and use my car,'" Abdul recalled. "OK, I'll do my best to be an interpreter for them."

They left for El Paso at 10:30 p.m. and drove through the night to reach the meeting.

"That's the kind of thing Abdul will do," Feinsod said.

Abdul's kids range from a second-grader to preschoolers. They're learning English rapidly. Abdul said his second-grader's teacher in New Mexico told him and his wife that "she's never seen a student like this — she learned reading so fast." The youngster wants to be a nurse and a teacher someday.

As Feinsod pointed out, "If she were in Afghanistan today, under the Taliban, she wouldn't be able to do these things."

Since the Taliban takeover two years ago — according to UN Women, a United Nations organization — women and girls in Afghanistan have been prohibited from going to parks, gyms and public bathing houses; stopped from pursuing education beyond the sixth grade; and all but prohibited from working outside of health and education.

In their New Mexico town, Abdul's teenage nephew works in a local store and has risen to assistant manager. "He's very happy," Abdul said.

As for Abdul himself, he'd like to continue his own education. And he wants to continue helping his community, reaching out to others.

"I decided to accept challenges, to be a strong member of the community, in any community in the USA — Terre Haute, [here], anywhere," Abdul said. "Life is not easy for anyone. Life has a lot of challenges. Life has more difficulties. But you are the one to pass those challenges and get stronger and help each other."

Mark Bennett can be reached at 812-231-4377 or mark.bennett@tribstar.com.