You might find you save time if you 'pass' on appetizers
QUESTION: I recently attended a reception and meeting where they passed the appetizers instead of having them on a table filled with food where guests helped themselves. The waiters brought a napkin and there were several choices during the two-hour event. Do you think that is a good idea for a party? I liked it because I did not have to wait in line.
CALLIE’S ANSWER: Yes, this is called "passed hors d'oeuvres" when it's before the meal has begun. They usually are a bite size of food. Appetizers usually are served seated, indicating a meal is about to begin. Do whatever you prefer for your party.
LILLIE-BETH’S ANSWER: This circulating method of serving appetizers is used often during the cocktail hour before a dinner event or in events that are cocktail parties alone. Serving hors d’oeuvres this way is a convenient way to give guests a bite while still letting them network and visit with others. They’re usually bite-sized, easy to eat and not messy. Guests can take the ones that look appealing to them or decline them all together.
HELEN’S ANSWER: There are many events in the 5 to 7 p.m. time slot that have appetizers or small amounts of food passed during the evening, particularly when wine and drinks are served. If dinner is not included, then it is great to have something to eat. Sometimes a whole table is devoted to appetizers, but I think having someone pass them around is very festive. For a party, there should be several wonderful bite-sized choices available. Be sure the appetizer is one that your guest can juggle with a drink in hand and can be eaten in one or two bites, without dripping sauces on themselves. Also something with a bone that has to be disposed of is not a good choice for passed hors d’oeuvres. I agree with our reader that not waiting in line has some merit.
GUEST’S ANSWER: Yvette Walker, assistant dean, University of Oklahoma Gaylord College of Journalism and Mass Communication: It's not at all unusual for higher-scale events to have waiters serving the guests appetizers. It makes sense, especially following COVID-19 and even post-COVID protocols. From personal experience, there are pros and cons. You can get up close to the food and tell the waiter what you prefer. However, I've also been at parties where the wait staff was limited and people were waiting for a waiter to come to them. In that case, it would have been faster to get the food.
Since 2009, Callie, Lillie-Beth and Helen have written this generational etiquette column. They also include guest responses from a wide range of ages each week. So many years later, Callie is 20-plus; Lillie-Beth is 40-plus and Helen is 60-plus. To ask an etiquette question, email helen.wallace@cox.net.
This article originally appeared on Oklahoman: Passing out hors d'oeuvres can be convenient, more sanitary
