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Mike DiMauro: Dr. I: What if Taylor Greene hit third for the KC Royals?

mike dimauro, the day, new london, conn.
·4 min read
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Aug. 7—Idle Thoughts, while waiting for high school football, college football, pro football, fantasy football, betting on football and, well, you get the idea:

Dr. Idle, Dr. I to close friends, noticed that last weekend, the first two batters Kansas City Royals' order were Whit Merrifield and Bobby Witt Jr. (Merrifield was soon traded to the Blue Jays).

It got Dr. I thinking: Had the Royals enlisted U.S. Rep. (and apparent political pundit) Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) to hit third, they'd have had Whit, Witt and Nitwit.

— Oh, how Dr. I will miss the late summer night drives home listening to the Vin Scully on XM Radio.

The greatest. Retired the trophy. And nobody else ever called a no-hitter in iambic pentameter. (And if you've never heard Scully's lyrical call of "two and two to Harvey Kuehn," go back and listen.)

— Dr. I was among the first to point out that Connecticut has become a two-season state: winter and road construction.

Now the Department of Transportation continues its assault by changing exit numbers and listing notable attractions with signs on Route 9.

Dr. I saw a sign for the "Ivorytown" Playhouse the other day. One problem: It's the Ivoryton Playhouse. Only been there for 90 years.

Dr. I wonders: If the same people were in charge of road signs in the D.C. area, would they direct traffic to the "Washingtown" Monument?

— Note to Frankie Montas and Andrew Benintendi: It doesn't count until you do it for the Yankees.

— Mad props and bon mots to ESPN for "The Captain."

Best line so far: David Wells threw his arms up in frustration on the mound when three fielders failed to catch a pop up/bloop single. Jeter to Wells later in the dugout: "We don't do that (stuff) here."

— Public Service Announcement I: The 21st Annual 9/11 Tour de Force bike ride begins Sept. 9 and goes 300 miles to benefit fallen law enforcement officers. Waterford High softball coach Andy Walker and several other locals involved. Donate at app.donorview.com/VQjrn.

— Public Service Announcement II: The annual Kiwanis Club Golf Tournament is Sept. 16 at Shenneossett. Proceeds to benefit the club's community service fund. Contact Ted Nelson (ted@tjnelsonhomes.com) or John Russell (johnrussell319@hotmail.com) for more information.

— From a UConn men's basketball season ticket holder: "My Gampel tickets for two seats last year were $640. This year, $1,350. For eight games and four I do not want to see. No thanks."

— Congrats to former Fitch wrestler Billy Goff, who won his UFC fight by knockout last week in Las Vegas. Goff earned a UFC contract as well. Looking forward to following his career.

— Per an ESPN.com story on the travails of college football:

"While the NCAA does have a rule against using NIL as a recruiting inducement, most don't believe it matters. Nearly 80 percent of respondents (to a survey) said NIL represents a black-market pay-for-play system that is being used to secure recruits and transfers."

And unless the CIAC awakens, the same thing, on a smaller — but no less concerning — scale will happen here.

— A belated happy birthday to The Great One, otherwise known as happily retired Ch. 30 anchor Gerry Brooks.

— Which has a worse batting average this summer: The Supreme Court or Joey Gallo?

— ECC Summer League basketball semifinals Monday night at Summit Sports and Fitness in Norwich: Waterford vs. Norwich at 5; Windham vs. Montville at 6.

— Dear New London Leaders: You are absolutely positive that NOTHING can be done about these delinquents on their dirt bikes scaring the bejesus out of innocent drivers?

Nothing?

Baloney. Some people around here need to start doing their jobs.

— Summer always feels better with empty seats at Fenway.

— Rutgers is selling football season ticket packages at Costco. (No, really.)

— Why are Yankee fans suddenly acting as though Jordan Montgomery is Steve Carlton?

— Not that Dr. I would ever defend Tom Brady (who couldn't beat Eli Manning), but he got four games for deflating footballs and this miscreant Watson only gets six for being a predator?

— So do you have your popcorn ready get for the UConn football opener at Utah State?

Throw out the records when those two behemoths meet, right?

— Prediction for Sept. 3: Notre Dame 27, Ohio State 26. (This is called the reverse jinx.)

This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro